Mistletoe

Summary: They never saw the mistletoe. They would stand under it for the rest of their careers, never realizing it was there. S/J

Author's note: This story was written in reponse to a prompt on Gateworld - "Jack and Sam are standing under the mistletoe. They do not see it. Daniel and Teal'c do."

~for Claudia~


Daniel let out a small laugh. It was an ironic laugh, The sad kind, not the snorty kind. Teal'c raised an eyebrow and looked curiously at his friend. Daniel indicated to his right. General O'Neill and Colonel Carter were talking, standing just a touch too close together. If anyone else was looking, they wouldn't notice anything out of the ordinary. But Daniel and Teal'c knew better. Sometimes standing just too close was all they could manage. Even then it was a luxury. A subconscious acknowledgment that they were tied together.

But still, Daniel could tell that they were restraining themselves. Being so careful. Every conversation between them held a tension that had nothing to do with gate efficiency or battle tactics or whatever it was that they were talking about. And they were being so careful not to let that tension show, that they didn't even notice they were standing so innocently, so perfectly under a sprig of mistletoe. It was their whole life. Ignoring the obvious. And what was so obvious to Daniel would never be acknowledged by his two friends. They would stand under that mistletoe for the rest of their careers, never realizing it was there.

Jack was losing concentration. It was always difficult to concentrate when Carter started talking. Not because what she said was boring, although it often was, but because there were far better things to be doing. Watching her eyes, for one. They practically glowed when she started to babble. And not in the Goa'uld way. In the 'mother who is proud of her baby' way. It always made his mind wander. Then there was the hair. For a woman who would still be beautiful if she was bald, she had an amazing head of hair. It swished to and fro so beautifully, so fluidly. And if he stood close enough to her, too close, he could just feel the breeze of her breath on his skin. He wondered if she knew why he stood so close to her. And every word that she uttered was like a magnetic field, pulling him closer to her. He had to restrain himself. He was on 24 hour watch by his most critical supervisor. Himself. He wasn't to laugh too much, wasn't to look in her eyes for too long. He could never touch her and it was generally best if they were never alone in a room. He had already scanned the area around him. Teal'c and Daniel weren't too far away.

He looked over at his friend. Daniel had a sad smile on his face and was looking above Jack's head. Worried that Daniel was reading his mind, Jack looked up as well.

Mistletoe.

And he suddenly understood the look on Daniel's face, and wished he wasn't there. He had no right to know, to understand what was going on, but that smile said it all. He clearly didn't miss the irony.

Daniel's eyes met Jack's for a moment and the younger man nodded. Within seconds, he and Teal'c were gone. Jack gritted his teeth. They weren't supposed to understand. And they weren't supposed to leave. Leaving made things more difficult. Now they were alone.

He hadn't noticed that Sam had stopped talking. He turned his attention back to her and saw her looking at the place were his eyes had just been. The mistletoe.

She didn't even laugh nervously, like she might have a few years ago. She didn't say anything. Her left thumb rubbed the small ring on her finger and she looked at him, her eyes only just betraying a look of defeat.

"Merry Christmas, sir," she said, quietly, guiltily.

"Merry Christmas…Sam."

It was as stale as a month-old biscuit. And after all this time, it was all they could manage. But if either of them could see past the endless numbness they saw in the other's eyes, they might just be surprised at the immensity of the passion beyond it. Eight years worth of wounds could never quite kill what was between them. And no fiancées or galactic wars ever could.

They didn't know it yet, but it would be the last Christmas they spent alone.

~fin~