29Hello everyone.
after a Mother's resolve I've got a new story for you guys.
Hell, I even have another one coming up in Oregairu pretty soon I hope.
Please enjoy reading the story and let me know what you think.
It was but a few months ago that Hikigaya Hachiman had joined the service club. There were many instances where the club members had tried relying on one another. During these times Hachiman had met many new people, though for some reason they were mostly girls.
One by one each of the requests for the club were solved, but at the cost of one of the members. Time and time again his worthiness and prowess showed in his actions so slowly but surely everyone came to acknowledge him in a fashion. An acknowledgement he never received before.
The first signs started at brief nods from familiar faces in his class, starting with Kawasaki Saki. It didn't take long for others such as Ebina Hina and Kakure Tobe to follow. Certainly there were some that remained cold or ignored his very presence, but it was far better than the outright hostility he had received before.
Yet with this acknowledgement, Hachiman didn't dare to stray from his path of loneliness.
It wasn't because he feared rejection. He was already rejected by all his peers before. Even now Yukinoshita refused to be his friend, twice.
It wasn't because of hurting his own feelings. Feelings were only detrimental to his way of living, a necessity to fuel the club requests.
It wasn't because he wanted to socialize, because from the time he could remember he was destined to be an outcast. The precious few times at the playground where no one wanted to play with him. During breaks at kindergarten all the way up to middle school. It was the sheer loneliness that drove him to find meaning in cosplay and reading whatever he could find within arms reach.
There was also his addiction to gaming as it was an easy way to temporarily forget the deep void that settled in his heart yet at the same time those very stories of love, friendship and adventure showed him what he could not have.
The hero was happy. The hero was strong and had willing followers, people that would lay their lives down for his and he in return for them. Their adventures bringing them to new places, to new friends and eventually a happily ever after.
Hachiman just knew a happy ending wasn't in store for him.
Not because he couldn't love his wife and children. Komachi knew how kind and loving her brother was under his rude exterior.
Not because he didn't want to provide for a family. His career as a househusband grew from a desperate need for affection.
It wasn't because of the fact that he was called creepy in all sorts of creative ways. Hachiman was quite handsome, as he thought so himself.
The one and only reason his social life wouldn't amount to anything were his eyes. His small, beady, creepy, empty eyes. In all honesty Hachiman could say that his overall value would drop from a solid eight to somewhere closer to zero. He would know best... after all he saw them each and every day staring back at him, staring at the effect his eyes would have on people in the streets and in school, how they would immediately change their behavior towards him. His loneliness, his fears and nightmares. His days of being alone, being ignored and rejected. There was only one cause.
It was all in the eyes.
Inside of the clubroom where the sun was slowly turning the sky from a bright blue to a more deep orange reddish, the signs that another day was coming to an end. Two of the occupants were quietly doing something for themselves. Yukino was reading a biography of Yukichi Fukuzawa, one of the leading figures that changed feudal Japan to the modern economy it is today. She would take small nips from her tea and if looking extremely close her eyes would rest on a resting figure at the end of the long table, her long locks hiding the small tinge of pink on her cheeks.
Yui was far more exuberant in her activities as her fingers danced over the screen of her smartphone, replying to messages and scrolling through apps that kept her closely informed about the activities of her friends. But once in a while she would lock the screen and look at her clubmate resting his head on his hands, near silently as his body would shake with every breath.
At times their attention would be grabbed by a deep exhale followed by Hachiman burying his face deeper into his palms before resuming his quiet slumber. the girls would check on him before smiling at the other and continuing their activities. a sudden deep breath, different from the others, grabbed the attention of the room once more. The telltale signs of awakening very much present as Hachiman yawned and sleepy eyes blinked in sleepiness.
For a moment his eyes were unfocused before a small thud in front of Hachiman grabbed his attention. The delicious smell of lukewarm tea filled his nose as Yukino placed his custom-made pan-san cup in front of him, her long fingers slowly untangling from the ceramic.
Hachiman followed the pale fingers all the way up until they were softly pressed on a pair of smirking lips. He knew he was baited when he saw her eyes sparkle in pure mischievousness. He simply didn't get the fact that Yukino was becoming increasingly more attracted to him, a small kiss sign was easily ignored.
Yukino was never one to care too much about his eyes, though they did and still do make a perfect way to start any word game with her clubmate.
a soft grumble followed by a small ''Thanks Yukinoshita.'' was all his outwards appearance would show, but a quiet uncommon giggle did put some color on his cheeks. Yukino sent him a final warm look before walking back to her seat. Yui softly smiled at their little moment that happened increasingly more often.
Hachiman's throat bobbed twice as he emptied his cup of tea with his eyes closed. Enjoying the smooth flavour of the tea leaves and remembering his daydream. Yui addressed him, causing his attention to shift to her. They would speak of the upcoming exams, with Yukino interjecting to clean the sweat stains he left behind on the table with a smile, before he would explain the most important things to know about the social studies. Anything else would be Yukino's forte.
''...and after subtracting the result at y the answer to x becomes clear.'' Yukino voiced as she would go through the questions with Yui, very well knowing that Hachiman was listening as well.
''..that feeling...Hikigaya-kun are you staring indecently at us again?'' She asked with a faux-scared voice. ''Aaughh.. Hikki!'' Yui added with a squeak and a glowing blush, holding her arms in front of her chest.
''..damn you, Yukinoshita..'' He grumbled with a dull stare at Yukino. ''..and I don't stare. I only observe what is happening around me.''
Yukino deadpanned at him, causing Hachiman to look away from her glacial stare. Yui adding a disappointed ''Hikki..'' prevented him from doing it overly obvious again.
Since it would happen quite often, it didn't take long for the girls to continue again, and for Hachiman to look at them. Two of the girls he spent the most time with, two of the girls that helped him become a different person. a better person in the long run.
They would smile more at him, and actually meaning the smile. Not a smile out of obligation. Out of reflex his eyes drooped and a tiny touch of affection could be found in them. Hachiman's lips stretched upwards, showing a touch of his teeth and was reminiscing their activities.
The two girls he asked for help...to find something genuine.
''...two girls I might come to lo-''
The sheer audacity of his imagination caused Hachiman to sputter and cough, gaining the attention of the girls. Both girls were surprised by their clubmate's deep red cheeks. Yet through the coughing his eyes were on theirs. Once Hachiman had his breathing back under control, he shyly moved his eyes away from the girls. Preparing for another salvo of perverted accusations. Instead they closed the distance and stood next to him.
It was Yui that closed the distance first as she grabbed his shoulder from the back, slowly rubbing them with her soft hands. She sent his inquisitive stare a broad smile as she continued her ministrations. Yukino acted more tempered as she simply stared at him with different looks. She was very precise in the use of body language, sending mixed signals of interest and fear, open and dangerous, or want and desire.
Hachiman's eyes bulged from the last signals as he stared up at her, not daring to believe them as her stare turned back to normal, though a bit warmer than usual. His stare was fixed on her own, searching for any sign of deceit and actual truth.
''..Creepygaya-kun... please don't keep staring at me with those eyes, I am fearing for my chastity.'' She spoke with twinkles in her eyes, but the message she was trying to convey shot right past her intended target.
Though his eyes were much smaller than average, they were certainly as expressive as any other. The hopeful emotion in his eyes wavered for a moment before shattering completely. No warmth or coldness was visible, much like the first weeks of joining the club. Yukino felt slightly scared when his empty eyes locked unto her own as he stood up, not too gently having removed Yui's arms.
''H-ey..'' Yui started with an undignified squeak, but quickly caved in when Hachiman's eyes were on hers. The girls were quiet as Hachiman grabbed his bag and walked to the door.
He slid open the door and left with a quick goodnight, leaving his clubmates behind with several conflicting feelings.
On the outside Hachiman looked the same as always as he walked through the streets, leaving his school behind him in the distance. It was a sunny day where even with the sun slowly setting there were still many people outside enjoying the weather.
People that walked towards him would nine out of ten times look at him. They were of all ages and all sexes, but their reactions were almost identical. After all these years you'd say Hachiman was no longer bothered by the stares that would quickly change into disgust, fear or guarded. Though the reaction of children was mostly curiosity or happiness in case of Kawasaki Keika. But no, the distinct disapproval doesn't become easier.
Everyone has a breaking point, a point of no return that Hachiman is about to reach. He slouched even more than usual as he stared in front of him. Walking the path to his home the same way as always. No particular thoughts, no exciting monologue and no surprise visits from one of his acquaintances. Nothing or nobody to make him forget his train of thoughts. ''brrp brrp.'' his phone suddenly buzzed, causing his eyes to regain a semblance of activity as he took his trusty folding phone out of his pocket.
It didn't take long for him to decipher his sister's message 'Bring home groceries creepy Onii-chan. You sister is very, very hungry and waiting at home for you. Ah! that sweet comment costs you a lot of Komachi points~' When he read the text a small smile did creep on his lips, but it soon caused people around him to increase their pace. A few passive blinks of his eyes before the smile turned into a fine thin line.
The reason he should be content with what he has.
The reason why finding something genuine is only a dream for him.
''Beep beep beep beep''
''Trrrrr...Trrr...Trrrrr...''
Hachiman had just finished buying the groceries in the store he always visited on his way home. Only now the street he used every day was filled with men and heavy duty equipment to close up a sinkhole that didn't exist that very morning. Trucks coming to dump a lot of sand, concrete mixers and men removing large parts of asphalt. Standing behind the warning signs he watched some of the work being done, something he always liked to do, and looked around to follow the temporary signs that would bring him to where he needed to go.
Soon he was directed to an old derelict marketplace close to the rail line. He used the bridge daily to cross it but he was forced to go through a place he had never been before. Like many of these marketplaces, only traditional stores such as a barber, fish store, vegetable store and tatami salesman. There were many closed stores between them, likely never to be opened again. The road was not very accessible since much of it needed some renovation, missing some parts of asphalt and much of the old painted advertising was washed away by the countless seasons that had passed ever since.
But even in such a marketplace there were plenty of filled vending machines storing his beloved coffee. The first sip brought some life back to his slouched appearance as he quietly moved on. But just as he got outside of the marketplace a new shop had opened on a very unexpected location. Right under the bridge. There wasn't anything special about its appearance with only two balloons floating in front of the door and a girl that handed out flyers to anyone that walked the road past the shop.
The girl was dressed in a gothic maid outfit, smiling as she approached the commuters and handing them a flyer. Some of the males blushing brightly as they took the flyer with trembling hands. Hachiman ignored the scene in front of him and kept moving on, only staring at the girl in passing he never stopped or waited for a flyer.
''Hey Sir! One moment please!'' a female voice suddenly yelled as she moved over to Hachiman. Once there she stood in front of him and stared him in the eye, moving her face from the left to the right while holding him still. Hachiman was very confused when her brown eyes actively sought his own, staring at them from all sides before a sudden glint in her eyes told her all the she needed to know. A bright smile appeared on her face as she said ''Please, this way sir. Our newly opened store can surely help you.'' and she pulled Hachiman with her to the door. With one fast pull the girl opened the door and pushed Hachiman inside.
''Mr. Kojima is in the back.'' She said before closing the door, leaving Hachiman confused behind and continuing with her work.
Though he was a bit confused, Hachiman was calming down as he listened to the tasteful music coming from the back of the store. As he looked around there were wooden shelves everywhere, filled to the brim with all kinds of handcrafted glasses, glass-frames and trendy monocles. His temporary curiosity was interrupted when slow footsteps from behind one of the shelves came closer. an elderly man wearing a pair of smart glasses and a kind of his face approached him with a cup of fresh coffee.
''Good afternoon young man. I take it Chisato had something to do with your appearance here?'' He asked with a kind voice. Hachiman nodded and sat on one of the chairs where the man pointed at. ''I see. My apologies for her actions, she always picks the - how should I say - interesting ones walking outside.''
His calm voice and gentle smile put Hachiman further at ease as he let his eyes roam through the room. The elderly man quietly stared at him before sipping from his tea in the same way as Yukino did.
''I see you have a good eye young man.'' he started softly, placing his cup in his palm. ''Through the years I've helped many people with their needs for a decent ocular instrument. From the repair of glasses to crafting lenses. Not everyone had the means to pay for glasses so I allowed their payment in items and craftsmanship.'' The man spoke with such reminiscence that it even affected a long such as himself.
''Now young man. I've noticed that you have quite peculiar eyes, don't you?'' The man gently asked as Hachiman's face scrounged up slightly. The man chuckled at his expression and quickly added ''I've seen almost any and all kinds of eyes. From those with diseases, those that were blind and those that were disfigured. There is no need for worry young man.''
Hachiman swallowed deeply as he looked at the man anticipating his reply. The now empty cup held between his hands, feeling the grooves of the earthenware pressed under his thumbs as he rolled the cup in thought.
''..I-I don't really know where to start..'' He slowly started as the man calmly listened to his soft voice. ''..but I was born with these small creepy eyes.'' The man looked deep in thought as he stood up and walked up to Hachiman. He removed his glasses and stared at Hachiman, a soft frown quickly appeared on his face. ''This won't do young man. Come with me to the back of the store.''
The duo walked only a few meters to the back, but the store immediately changed. No longer the traditional but a state-of-the-art ocular measuring machine greeted Hachiman as he was directed to the stool next to it. Out of his chest pocket the elderly man retrieved a pair of white gloves and walked up to the machine.
''Don't worry, this is a tonometer. I'm using it to check your eyes'' The man softly spoke as he held Hachiman's chin and directed it on a soft bar underneath the machine, putting his eyes at the correct hight to look. ''I will perform a few routine tests and see if there is anything I can do for you. This will of course be free of charge.''
The man's soft voice guided him through each of the tests, slow circles he had to follow with his eyes, objects that were close and moved further away until he could no longer discern them and flashing lights to trigger his eye muscles.
Suddenly the man hummed in delight and turned the machine off. Hachiman was slowly release from the machine with black spots still flashing through his vision. ''Now young man, I happen to have some good news and some bad news. Which would you like to hear first?''
''I can use some good news, sir.'' Hachiman replied shortly after. ''The good news is that I can't help you in my store. This means that you don't need glasses of any sort.'' The man chuckled softly, but turned serious soon after. ''The bad news is that I am referring you to an ophthalmologist at the Chiba university hospital.''
''Now, now. Don't be scared.'' The man said as Hachiman's face slowly turned white. ''Your eyes are not damaged, though you have some problems with focus and discerning objects from a distance. I have seen it many times before, but not at your age. To be sure I will refer you to my son in the hospital.''
Hachiman calmed down a little as the elderly man wrote a letter at his desk before pressing two stamps on it and handing the letter to him. ''You look like you have suffered quite a bit young man. Just remember there is more to a man than his eyes.'' Like a good host the man walked Hachiman to the door to let him out. a respectful nod from Hachiman was the goodbye the man received before a soft 'thank you' filled the air.
''Good luck.'' The elderly man finally thought as he saw Hachiman walking away with the letter tightly gripped in his palm and closed the door.
Since last night, Hachiman had been nervous for the first time in a long, long time. He came home and was greeted by his sister, who noticed something was going on but as a good sister would wait for him to open up to her and simply glomped him for taking too long. Having to do both dinner and the dishes had nothing to do with it.
Before going to bed he called the number on the letter and got connected to the doctor's assistant. After giving the name on the letter he was quickly scheduled for the next day. For tonight, where his parents were once again not home, Komachi joined him as it would be a cold night. Like many nights before they spent a few minutes talking about their day and cuddling up close. Creepy eyes or not, Komachi would never look away from him.
"I love you onii-Chan. Most in the world..." Komachi whispered when she wrapped her arms tightly around Hachiman and rubbed her face in his neck. Her breathing slowly evened out and a small smile stretched on her lips. Times like these have become increasingly more often and Hachiman was truly happy during these moments, but for some reason the more time he spent with others the more time Komachi tried to claim for herself.
His eyes lingered fondly on his sister, running his fingers through her small purple locks. "...mm..-compoop...Hachiman.." she quietly moaned out.
For a few more minutes Hachiman enjoyed the soft feeling of his sister' body against his own before he too fell asleep.
The next day in school he had more trouble than usual to follow the lessons. Where he would pay attention during Hiratsuka-Sensei's lesson he had no problems with sleeping during the other classes, but the fact that he stayed awake prompted many of the teachers to ask him questions during class, something he utterly hated.
During lunch he couldn't be bothered to go to his normal place, so instead he went to the rooftop to catch some fresh air.
Hachiman brought some food and a tea from home, he couldn't take any high sugar drinks as was mentioned in the letter. He brooded momentarily before the heavy door to the roof opened and a familiar figure appeared. Kawasaki Saki looked surprised for a moment before closing the door behind her. "Hikigaya, I didn't expect to see you here." She said as she took a seat next to him. Over the months she tried to get to know him a little better, but not enough for her liking.
"I wanted to get some air but I didn't want to walk too far." Hachiman replied with a calm look, though his eyes were fixed on the ground.
Having to deal with her siblings and knowing him a little better, Saki shuffled closer to him, nearly having her thighs and shoulders touching his. "...uhm Hikigaya, is everything alright?" She asked with a surprising amount of warmth in her tone.
Hachiman slowly blinked before his eyes met hers, her blue hair waving in the wind causing him to blink. Her eyes didn't look uncomfortable as they inquisitively peered in his own, though his stare brought a small tinge of pink on her cheeks. For Hachiman, her sudden stare caused a flush the size that Isshiki would make to appear on his face and looked away. The loner duo were both pink in the face, their distance shortened unaware to both of them, but they were down to earth enough not to lose themselves in a fantasy.
"...uh..Kawa-saki..?" Hachiman began as he looked at his classmate again. "..If I tell you, will you keep it to yourself?"
Her swift reply was a forefinger to the head. "...Hikigaya who am I supposed to tell and be honest, no one in class would want to know. Also I am not like the others to gossip and I-..." Saki began to ramble on as her cheeks turned back to pink again the longer she talked "...and even if someone asked me I wouldn't try to..sniff.. sorry for rambling on." Her upbeat voice slowed down and became almost apologetic. "...Baka you know what I mean..if my friend wants my help I will give that...especially to you.." Hachiman stared at her for a few moments, causing her to turn her head away, before he softly began to chuckle. He stopped soon after when she started to shake and sniffle. "...I didn't know you considered us friends, Kawasaki." Hachiman said kindly as the shaking stopped, Saki turned to him with red eyes and replied "why would I consider you a friend. You helped me out several times with school, Tashi also talks about you and Keika is adoring you. You only met her twice and she still talks about you, dumbass...why won't you understand."
Hachiman was about to reply, but the sneer on Saki's face prevented him from speaking. She stabbed his chest a couple times with her finger. "...if you were going to say that you don't understand your appeal I'm going to kick your ass!"
But Saki wasn't done yet as she grabbed his collar and shook him. "You insensitive jerk. You are only concerned about others, only help others and not yourself. You can be so kind, so thoughtful, so adorable but you only focus on your negative points."
Het breath deepened as she spoke favorable of him, her face flashing through anger, adoration and affection. When she was finally done she breathed heavily, her chest pressed against his and their distance closed to almost nothing. Hachiman noticed their closeness the same time as Saki did and sputtered for a moment. He didn't push her away and kept her close to him. His lips stretched in a solemn smile as he looked at her eyes growing large from their closeness. "Kawasaki, what do you think of my eyes?" He asked and stared at her.
She stared blankly at him before blinking and softening her gaze. ''Sometimes you really are blind, Hikigaya. Sure, your eyes creeped me out the first couple of times I looked at you but no one is perfect. Anyone that only cares about the way your eyes look isn't worth your time or kindness.'' her hands crept up his face and held his cheeks in place. Hachiman's lips opened slightly as he was listening to her words. Her purple eyes showed no signs of deceit or lies.
''..kuch..if you say it like that, I have no choice but to believe you, Kawasaki.'' Hachiman finally spoke, his eyes no longer guarded as he looked at her. Saki nodded as she released his cheeks but didn't move away from him. She looked at him, her eyes feverously and unconsciously licking her bottom lip. Her lips moved, trying to form words but wasn't able to as the bell rang and interrupted their time together. The sounds of laughter and opening and closing doors could be heard as everyone moved back inside. It was obvious that Saki wasn't all too happy as a proverbial dark cloud loomed over her head.
''Kawasaki..'' Hachiman said calmly ''We have to get up.''. His words caused her to pout in disappointment, but made no move to get up. Hachiman sighed and wrapped his arms around her and pulled her closer to him.
Saki kyaa'd which caused him to chuckle softly, causing his body to reverberate with hers. Their closeness felt wonderful to both of them and they enjoyed it momentarily. Two loners that both knew that always being alone and always being chosen last still needed a human's touch.
Unfortunately the both of them still got a lash out from Hiratsuka-sensei for being late.
The duo, one with a bump on his head, left Hiratsuka-sensei's office after classes. ''Your smart mouth will one day get you into more trouble or turn you into a masochist'' Saki said with a frown. She was strong and had no problem saving Hachiman from violence, but when he would say dumb things he had the pain coming. Her strict tone soon turned to a more meek one, her confident pose become more feminate when she turned to him. ''...so Hikigaya, will you go to club now..?'' Saki asked.
The young man next to her was tentatively rubbing the bump on his head before he looked at her. He shook his head and said ''I have to go to the hospital today, so I'll only let them know that I'll be going out for the day.'' a concerned look appeared on Saki's face as she laid a hand on his. ''I hope its nothing bad.'' She asked softly and received a small smile in return. Hachiman described last night's event at the store and the appointment he made.
''Heh..that would only happen to you Hachi-Hikigaya!'' Saki said and blushed as she almost called him by his first name. Hachiman lifted a single eyebrow at her strange behavior. ''..I don't know what to expect...somehow I'm nervous...an eye specialist is going to check them out...you know, what if..'' Saki was slightly troubled by his words. His fears were justified and she'd offered to come with him, but she had to pick up her sister Keika and her other siblings from daycare.
''I-I'm really sorry..'' Saki voiced softly. ''If I could I would've come with you, but I need to pick up Keika and the others, do the groceries, clean up before dinner, cook dinner..'' she rattled off a whole list of activities. Hachiman was deeply surprised and happy at her suggestion. ''..I appreciate the thought, Kawasaki. Maybe... next time?''
''..ahh..sure I'd like that.'' she answered with a cute blush. ''`uhm..would it be alright if I walk with you? Keika's daycare is pretty close to Chiba university.''
Hachiman thought for a moment before nodding. ''I don't mind the company. Do you want to come with me to the clubroom or wait outside?'' The choice was quickly made as Saki dashed off to retrieve her outdoor shoes and came back to him with a sheepish smile. ''Looks like someone is excited to go for a walk'' he teased her. Though there was no explicit meaning by his teasing, for Saki it was a way to get closer to him as she rewarded him with a bright smile.
They continued walking, their shoulders often brushing the other but neither seemed to mind, until they reached the clubroom. It was Hachiman who became a bit down when he spotted the door, remembering the way he left the day before. He sent Saki a small nod when she leaned against the wall right next to the door when Hachiman slid it open without knocking.
''How often do I have to say it, Hiratsuka sensei. Kno-'' Yukino said as she lifted the gaze from her book, but quieted down when she spotted Hachiman. There was some unease in her eyes before addressing him. ''..I am glad to see you again, Hikigaya-kun. I thought you might have scurried off for a week or two, but I am glad I was mistaken. You can take pride in that.''
Hachiman returned her challenging gaze with one of his own, but he didn't have time for an epic battle of wits. Instead he waved at Yui, who was tapping on her phone but sent him a bright smile, before looking back at Yukino. In the past Hachiman was easily intimidated by her stare, but lately she mellowed out more and she become more meek in his presence. Like now her eyes widened instead of narrowed and rubbed her elbow shyly. ''I came to tell you that I will not be here today. I have a personal appointment.'' Hachiman said to his clubmates.
Yukino frowned a bit before asking ''..and what kind of personal appointment could you have, and have you told our advisor?'' Hachiman bristled a bit but replied shortly after. ''It's a medical appointment at the university hospital.''
''Ehhh..! Hikki are you okay?'' Yui asked as she dropped her phone on the table and walked up to him, feeling him up. ''..bahh get off, Yuigahama.'' Hachiman said as he pushed her away slightly, though Yui ignored it almost completely and kept holding onto his arms.
''Yuigahama, you should let go of that thing before his lust gets the better of him.'' Yukino half-shouted as she stood up. ''Uhh..this isn't the first time we have been close, Yukinon.'' Yui replied before looking away. ''..but..he..Hikki doesn't really like it when I touch him.''
The room was filled with silence after Yui uttered those words. The pair of hands that were hanging losely in her grip came to life as they grasped her back. cold, ivory fingers wrapped around her small ones, causing a quiet gasp to release from her lips. When Yui looked up at the owner of said hands and saw the final remnants of an internal battle in his small eyes. There was only one strong emotion that prevailed. It was his kindness. Hachiman stared in her widened brown eyes and uneasily spoke ''...I don't hate it when you touch me..I'm just not at ease with it yet. Give me some time to get used to it, will ya?'' and grinned like a villain. Yui listened closely to what he said, slowly making circles with her thumb on his palm. She was more in tune with the physical kind of affection and if Hachiman could help her more with the emotional side of things it would further their relationship even more.
She enjoyed touching his hand with a messy smile on her face before remembering who else was there. With a snap of her neck she looked at Yukino, who looked like she swallowed a lemon, and signed her to come to her. Slowly she stood up, straightening her skirt and jacket before she walked to her clubmates with a meek expression on her face. When she was within arms reach, Yui pulled her towards her and Hachiman. She unclasped her hand of Hachiman' and lifted Yukino's to meet his.
She fumbled slightly when the handshake she had in mind missed and instead caused their fingers to clasp around the others. Neither of the two had any strength in their hands to clasp tighter. Yui felt like she was being left out when her clubmates shyly stared at their fingers. Yukino wasn't one for giving up as she curled her fingers and clasped his hand. Though she was burning up like a lobster her smile was very much present. Hachiman tried to ignore his bubbling feelings when he could feel her soft and slender fingers grasping him tighter. To not let her win he stroke her thumb with his own, running from her first phalanx to the nail of her thumb before returning to the starting point, causing Yukino to gasp softly. Her eyes that at first were locked on their hands was now shyly seeking his own orbs. Her gaze was projecting happiness and uncertainness at their current situation. At once she took a step closer and laid her left hand on his right shoulder, slowly stroking the cotton beneath her fingers. Being this close to him reminded her of the fact how tall Hachiman had become as she had to lift her face up to look at his eyes.
Their intimate dance of fingers slowly continued and their eyes remained focussed on the other. But before any other developments could happen, a sudden cough broke the silence in the room. Upon looking where the sound came from, three pairs of eyes focussed on Saki standing in the door opening. She looked with a frown at Hachiman and pointed at her wrist. Hachiman quickly let go of Yukino, much to her displeasure, and left the room with a quick goodbye, followed by Saki.
As the sound of footsteps quickly disappeared since they were speeding off, Yukino stood silently next to Hachiman's chair before sitting down in his chair.
Yui didn't care as she didn't mention, but was a bit conflicted when she said ''..hmm..didn't Hikki say he had a personal appointment? so..why was Saki-chan there?''
The two girls would speak to no one what happened that afternoon, but secretly looking forward to spending more time in close quarters with Hachiman.
Saki was a bit perturbed after leaving school Hachiman noticed. She replied to all of his questions but could see some tension in her body language. ''Why do you look so disappointed, Kawasaki?'' He asked. She stared at him before sighing in exasperation. ''...you really don't understand girls...idiot..'' She replied before wrapping her arm around his. Hachiman could feel his arm being squeezed between her soft biceps and her large breast, constantly rubbing him as they walked. As they walked locked together, Hachiman could spot a consistent blush on her face, spreading even further as she noticed his eyes on her but continued to walk.
Eventually they reached the university grounds and they had to go separate ways. It was a new experience for Hachiman as Saki made sure that he wouldn't forget they really were friends. Some additional threats like a good beating quickly caused him to cave in. ''Friends call each other by their first name, Hachiman...remember it.'' Saki whispered when she gave him a quick hug. ''..I did listen to what Yuigahama-san said in club. I will give you some affection from time to time. Good luck Hachiman, please let me know how it went tomorrow when we have lunch together.'' Hachiman had no chance to reply as she sped away to her sister's daycare, not giving him the chance to refuse her invitation.
Hachiman followed the way she walked. Her skirt swishing from side to side, her long pale legs a near perfect mix of fat and muscle. When he thought about that he quickly walked away, never noticing Saki's small smirk as her eyes tracked his moving body. The rest of the day and night she would be wondering how she had become so bold towards him, answering awkward questions from her siblings as she couldn't keep her blush in check.
It didn't take long for him to reach the hospital as the door opened and the cold stale air greeted him. Inside the signs directed him to the right floor. When he read 'department of ophthalmology' he knew he was at the right location.
Hachiman was swiftly approached by a nurse who helped him with a short survey. Questions regarding eyesight, pains and other possible issues were addressed. She quickly left and let him now that she would call him once the doctor was ready for him. He took a seat in the waiting room, passively watching the news on a nearby television. After half an hour and at least a dozen patients being addressed from several rooms it was his turn. a white door opened and a nurse stepped out with a map calling his name.
She brought him to a room and was told to wait once more. This time it only took mere minutes before a man with a white coat entered. He had a kind smile on his face as he approached Hachiman and introduced himself as 'dr. Kojima'. After introducing himself, Hachiman gave the letter he received in the store to the doctor. His interest was immediately piqued when the doctor whispered 'father' to himself.
''Alright Hikigaya-san. The letter is pretty clear as I can see some connections to the answers you've given us in the survey. Please take a seat over here and I'll find my slit lamp in the next room.'' The doctor said as he walked away.
Within moments he came back with a device that looked like two microscopes attached to each other. He put the device on a desk in front of Hachiman and moved Hachiman' chin and forehead on the support grip. ''Now keep your head as still as you can. You will feel a bit uncomfortable when I turn the biomicroscope on.'' the doctor voiced calmly as he sat on the other side of the device. He flipped the switch and a buzzing sound filled the room momentarily. For a good part of ten minutes the doctor looked through the microscope, before turning the device off. ''I noticed some issues with your eyes, so I will have to do a more thorough examination. This can hurt you quite a lot. I will have to ask for my assistant's support.''
He pressed a key on his phone and a moment later his assistant stepped in. They spoke in medical terms that Hachiman didn't understood. The assistant went out of the room again, and Hachiman was asked to lay his head back. ''When my assistant returns I will use some medical eye drops. It will take fifteen to twenty minutes before they become active and I'll perform the same tests again. Keep in mind that it can feel painful and you will most likely feel lightheaded for the rest of the day.'' Hachiman nodded that he understood what the doctor said and waited for the drops to be applied to his eyes.
Never had Hachiman felt such pressure in his eyes. It caused him to feel very nauseated and the nurse applied some stomach medicine to prevent him from throwing up. When the doctor checked him again after fifteen minutes he redid the same tests as before and after ten more minutes was finally done.
''I don't know how to bring you the news, Hikigaya-san. But I have gotten some very strange results.'' the doctor said. ''At first I did the normal tests, checking whether your eye muscles were working properly. I could instantly see they weren't due to the size of your pupil and iris. The contracting of your pupil was minimal once again due to your small iris. I have never seen anything like it, nor heard of it. At that moment I thought to myself that you were either a completely new case or there was something more. That's why I've applied the eye dilating drops to look deeper inside.''
Hachiman watched the doctor stand up and took a notebook from a leather bag. The man booted it up and looked up something for a moment.
''I have your medical file here, Hikigaya-san. There is nothing in particular here, but I am concerned about the fact you haven't been to a doctor since you were four years old. I do see that you've had a problem with your lymph nodes when you were three years old but I can't find any documentation regarding solving that problem. Come here for a moment.'' The doctor asked Hachiman to take his shirt off while he took out a pair of latex gloves. He gestured for Hachiman to lift his arms up as he felt around his body for the areas where lymph nodes could be found.
Hachiman ooff'ed a few times in recoil from the pain, causing the doctor to simply look surprised. ''I am deeply concerned with the fact that your nodes are so large and that you haven't visited the doctor with this issue. I do think I have determined what your eye problem is nonetheless.'' he finally said as he threw his gloves in the trash bin.
''I have determined that you have a severe case of Miosis. It's an eye disease that excessively constricts the pupil and can lead to eye problems later in life. During the second test I looked at your eye muscles, the retinal blood vessels and the optic nerve. I am glad to say that I couldn't find any indication of damage.''
''..hmm..Doctor does this mean that my eyes will remain like this?'' Hachiman asked after letting the doctor's words sink in. ''Though I have lived for a long time with them, it would be nice to look normal...''
The doctor looked at him and sent him a strenuous smile. ''Hikigaya-san, your eyes should never have looked the way they do now. In fact, I would say this is the smallest iris I have seen in at least ten years and that patient suffered from severe senior Miosis. If there had been a doctor that treated your lymph nodes your eyes would've been fine I'd say.''
As the doctor talked and explained what he was going to do, Hachiman was assaulted by all the words that caused him pain due to his eyes. 'Go away creepygaya...your eyes look like fishigaya...why are you staring at us froggy...Hikigaya-kun, I am fearing for my chastity with those eyes on me..' His quiet stare was noticed by the doctor when silent tears leaked down his cheeks, joining at the bottom of his chin before falling down on his shirt. ''..mmmhm..?..ah..thank you.'' Hachiman softly croaked out when the doctor gave him a tissue. ''I was young a long time ago and I know how cruel they can be.'' said the doctor as he opened a drawer and took a paper out. ''..I am not in a position to tell you what to do, but given my own experience with ocular problems you should be thoughtful about how to tell your friends and family.''
''I am prescribing you a two-week program of antibiotics. You should start feeling better after about a week, and your iris and pupil should slowly start to grow to their normal size. This will go slowly but it shouldn't take any longer than two weeks.'' The doctor said as he wrote the prescription and gave it to Hachiman. ''You can hand it over at the pharmacy in the lobby of the hospital. Since you don't have Miosis due to a tumor or by drug abuse they won't need any additional information from you.''
The doctor rummaged through another drawer and picked out a pair of glasses with dark glasses. ''This is a medical pair for you. It's not the same as sunglasses since it doesn't allow as much light in as regular ones. You need to wear these for the full two weeks to prevent your eyes from contracting too much due to the sunlight. After the two weeks you can simply remove them when you please. If you can give me a moment, I will write you a medical note to show at school.''
The next morning Hachiman woke up in a daze. Yesterday he did as the doctor told and received the antibiotics with an explanation from the pharmacist. Two capsules every morning before school and in two weeks he would have normal eyes. Who would have thought.
When he got home he was immediately accosted by his sister who backed off almost as soon when she saw no difference in her brother. ''a change of eyes or not, you're still a creepy brother.'' She said with a smile.
''..I wonder what I did to deserve that Komachi-chan...'' He deadpanned as she stuck out her tongue and began to make preparations for dinner. They enjoyed the night together and she was excited to hear there would be a change in his eyes. Many tears flooded that night. 'You're no longer embarrassing me in public' she said grinning wildly.
After washing up and bringing Komachi to her school, Hachiman biked to school wearing his new glasses. When he entered the school the first reactions were different than before. Hachiman was an infamous person in school, recognizable by his eyes, but when wearing glasses his fellow students were much friendlier as he received several greetings from unknown students.
At the start of each of his classes, Hachiman explained the situation and showed the note from the doctor. Some of his classmates like Yui and Saki were interested in the content, just like Hayama and Miura but they kept quiet. After the lunch bell rang Saki pulled Hachiman from his seat before he had the chance to put his books in his bag. Lunch itself was a nice moment as Saki made some rice krispies for him. He told her a little about his exam and that he was healthy but refrained from talking about his eyes turning to normal after two weeks.
After classes ended for the day he waited for Yui in the hallway, waving to Saki and Totsuka and noticing some stares from others that didn't recognize him. He ignored everyone around him and received Yui's bag to the shoulder for not listening to her. The two walked to the clubroom with Yui staring at his glasses and him looking back at her. She puffed her cheeks when he wouldn't talk about it.
They entered the clubroom. ''Yahallo Yukinon.'' Yui said happily as she skipped to her best friend. ''`Yo..'' Hachiman calmly said as he walked to his seat, scraping the chair over the floor.
''Good afternoon Yuigahama-san, Hikigaya-kun.'' Yukino replied as she put her novel down. She moved up to the tea set as Yui asked Hachiman about yesterday, specifically if he was on a date with Saki. Gently she filled in the cups as she listened with one ear to her clubmates' conversation. ''Leave me alone, Yuigahama...'' Hachiman said as he held Yui off with one hand and holding his novel in the other. ''She had to be close to the hospital so we went together.''
''..ehh Hikki! We would've come with you if you asked.'' Yui replied with a pout. ''We could've treated it as a club outing.'' Hachiman looked at her like she was crazy, but knowing her she meant well. ''..I appreciate the gesture, but I wasn't allowed to bring children that would ask and touch everything in the room.'' Yui didn't like that all as she began pinching Hachiman, causing him to drop his novel.
''H-Heey! Get off me and keep your hands off my glasses.'' Hachiman muttered as he held her off, rubbing her hair and pulling her cheek. A sound between a whine and a squeal left Yui's mouth as she clobbered him with her fists. Moments like these made the club to what it was. ''..a-and I didn't want to take your glasses, I just wanted to take a closer look.''
Hachiman deadpanned as he looked at her rubbing her wrists with a small blush on her face. She couldn't see his eyes but she could feel them on her as she looked away with a 'caught' look. The magic was broken when Yukino put two cups of tea in front of their seats, staring at the duo in annoyance. She walked around the table and looked at Hachiman. Since she couldn't see his eyes and she saw how he prevented Yui to take his glasses she took a thinking look as she stared at him.
''Hikigaya-kun has definitely grown over the last couple of months. He is still addicted to that coffee of his but I can't see anything on his skin. It seems Hikigaya-kun is able to sufficiently care for his body. Hmm...he is handsome enough I suppose.'' Yukino thought deeply, but her cheeks reflected part of her thoughts.
''..I don't know what I think about your glasses...I do commend your choice to refrain from scaring others with your appearance though.'' Yukino finally said after thinking momentarily.
She couldn't see the effect of her words as Hachiman's glasses hid his eyes, but his silence spoke for itself. He returned to his light novel but the words no longer resembled a readable sentence and just stared at the page. Yukino waited for a reply but quickly noticed the room was no longer as warm as it was before.
''...Yukinoshita...is it so hard to not constantly criticize me..?'' He softly muttered, though loud enough to being heard by Yukino who stood rigid when she heard his cold voice. ''...I am taking a break from club for the coming two weeks. I-I just can't see you. Goodbye...''
He left the room without ever touching the cup of steaming tea.
After leaving the club room, Hachiman didn't feel like going home yet. He was upset with himself en Yukino for criticizing his appearance again. At times she was kind and affectionate, but just as many times callous and mean. He enjoyed their word games but when she constantly points at his weaknesses it will only take so long before it becomes annoying. As he walked through the city, a lot of people would look at his, most likely due to his dark glasses, and no one would become suspicious of him. There were no sudden movements of people looking away, people holding their possessions closer to them or walking away from him subtly.
He stopped in front of a vending machine, looking in his pocket for some change. The setting sun reflected his image back to him and saw the dark glasses reflected. Hachiman slipped the glasses down his nose that he could see his eyes but no one else could.
After a single day there was some improvement, not much but some. His iris became slightly large and so did his pupil, but they were still much too small. At least it was improvement, Hachiman thought as he lifted his glasses back to their proper place.
''Sigh..''
''I guess it really is all about my eyes.''
Hope you guys enjoyed the first chapter.
What should I do about a relationship? I'd love to hear any suggestions you guys might have.
I want Hachiman to be forced into a normie lifestyle. Something he can't deal with but slowly adjusts to. His relations will change for the better or the worse and he will have a very interesting development around chapter 5-6. I am aware Hachiman was mentally all over the place and I might change it slightly in the future.
Please don't hold me too much on the Miosis diagnose. To me it was good enough for the story, if you don't like it..well too bad I guess. Next chapter will feature at least Shizuka, Haruno and Iroha.
Stay healthy in the very strange time we live in. #StayHome
