7Hello. This is my first The Mentalist fanfiction. Be warned that most of my stories deal with angst and pain. If you were looking for fluff, this is not the place to be. ;)
*** TRIGGER WARNING*** /child abuse and mentions of sexual abuse in this chapter and later chapters/
Teresa Lisbon shivered as she stepped out of the shower and onto the soft rug. She grabbed the towel hanging on its hook and wrapped it around her body which was already covered in goosebumps. She looked over at the clock which read 6:00 a.m. and sighed. Today is going to be rough, she thought as she dried off her legs and made her way up to her torso. Lisbon hung her towel back on the hook, exposing her body to the slightly warmer, but still frigid air in her bathroom. She made her way over to the sink and grabbed her toothbrush. After brushing her teeth and drying her hair, she turned to leave the bathroom. The thought to turn around and examine her back nagged at her. Really, Teresa? Now? She knew that she did not need to get into this again. Especially today.
Seventeen years ago today, she walked in on her father who had put bullet through his head a few hours prior to when she got home for school. She had stayed late that night for band practice and stepped cautiously into the house with her clarinet case in one hand and a bag of groceries in the other. Her brothers were at a friend's house that night, which was normal when she wasn't able to be home with them. She always told them when she had practice so that they could catch a ride with one of Tommy's friends after the school day ended.
Her head buzzed as the memories of that night flooded her mind. The metallic smell of blood assaulted her nose as she walked in the front door of her house. There was no sound other than the low murmur of the ABC Chicago News rambling on about the weather for the week and the upcoming sports for that evening coming from the living room. The images flashed through her mind. Blood spattered all over the way. The upper portion of her father's head barely intact. The look of horror on her neighbor's face when they came over after hearing her scream and cry for help for what she felt like was ages. The way her brothers reacted when the policeman told them that their father wasn't coming home after spending hours at the station.
The images flashed through her mind until she was dizzy and she managed stumble over to the toilet to sit down. Lisbon bowed her head and took in a few shaky breaths as her fingers made their way down to her stomach to feel the thick, raised scars that were scattered all over it and the rest of her body. The bruises and broken bones healed, but the scars were a reminder of what it was like growing up in that house. She walked over to the mirror, turned around, and peered over her left shoulder to inspect the scars on her back. She found it hard to believe that they were still there. Although they were somewhat faded, the long marks from being whipped with a belt entirely too hard were still visible. This was something that she learned to deal with, an unfortunate circumstance in her past which she buried under case files and the satisfaction of seeing justice served. The scars on her back, still red and angry, were hers. They were something that she could hide with great ease and she took comfort in the fact that nobody on the team knew they were there. Jane didn't even know about it. She knew that there was nothing shameful about it, even Rigsby had a colorful past, but she was their boss. She had to be tough for all of them and there were just some things that they didn't need to know. There was no way that she was going to let them see her as some sort of weak, helpless child. She looked up at the clock which now read 7:05 a.m and hurriedly applied a bit of mascara and lip balm. She then left the bathroom and went to her bedroom to get dressed.
She opened her closet and picked out her favorite blouse and found a pair of pants to go with it. She pulled them on and then put on her boots and her blazer. Teresa glanced at herself in the mirror on her way out of the door and took note of her slightly disheveled, but still professional looking hair. She hadn't had time to straighten or curl it due to her episode in the bathroom that morning. Jane will surely notice the change and be as insufferable as ever.
Teresa made her way out to the car and felt the engine start up as she turned the key. Her heart was pounding and she felt another wave of anxiety threaten to consume her again. She swallowed hard and tried to calm down bit. It's just another day, Teresa. Get it together, go to work, and then you can come home and relax. She told herself. And by relax she meant get drunk off of boxed wine and tequila and spend her Saturday nursing the hangover that she would certainly have from the night before. She breathed deeply and shifted her car into drive. That sounded like a plan.
Lisbon arrived at the CBI Building at 7:45 a.m. and headed to her office. She always got there early to savor the peacefulness before calls started coming in to tell them that they had another case. The building was empty other than a few essential personnel, some young agents doing their best to impress their bosses, and a certain CBI consultant who enjoyed sleeping on the couch most nights. She rolled her eyes at the sight of him stretched out on the couch with his Red John files spread out across the table next to an almost empty cup of tea. Lisbon walked over to the table and straightened up his files. She bent down and grabbed the blanket that he had thrown on the ground and draped it over his shoulders, reminding her of all of the nights that she had tucked her brothers in and gave them a kiss on the forehead. The latter was something that she would leave out in this case. She then turned around and picked up his teacup and headed to the sink in the break room.
The agent turned on the water and squeezed some dish soap in the water and let the suds form before she washed his cup and a couple of the old coffee cups and that were left there from the night before. She then drained the sink and picked up the dish towel that was laying next to it. If she wouldn't have been so distracted, she would have felt someone coming up behind her to grab the dry cups that were now on the counter. She about jumped out of her skin when she saw a hand coming up beside her and grabbing a coffee cup to put in the cupboard. Lisbon jerked around to see Jane holding a cup and looking at her questioningly.
"Oh. I'm sorry. Did I scare you?" He said in a soft voice, already knowing the answer by the way her eyes darted before finding his face.
"No, I just.." She trailed off, not knowing a good excuse for being so jumpy today. He looked into her eyes, obviously concerned, and then slowly turned to open the cupboard door above the coffee maker.
"You just what, Teresa?" Jane pushed. He could tell something was off by the way that she tried to avoid eye contact and by the way that her hair was not done up in her usual neat and very Lisbon sort of way. He looked away but noticed the way that her brow furrowed and as she pursed her lips.
"Never mind, Jane. Nothing. Really." She insisted as she pasted a smile on her face and folded the towel that she then placed back onto the counter. He nodded his head. She was relieved that this answer had satisfied him for now. Jane then turned around and began making himself a cup of tea while Lisbon started brewing a pot of coffee. The clock read 8:10 a.m. when Minelli walked into the break room to inform her of a new case.
"Morning Lisbon. Jane. Got a case over in Roseville. The victims are a 16 year old girl and her father. Looks like a murder suicide." Minelli stated shortly. "Your team is on it." Lisbon felt her stomach begin to knot up with a sense of dread. She did not want to deal with this today.
"Boss." Lisbon called out rather quickly, "I uh- we don't usually investigate those. I mean... they already know what happened, right?" She asked, hoping that they could just hand this one over the the Roseville PD.
"Roseville is swamped. They just busted a drug ring centered in one of their hotels and they asked us if we could help them out on this one. But it shouldn't be bad. Like you said, they already know what happened. It should be an open and shut case." He stated as he poured himself a cup of regular coffee and strolled out on the break room.
"Of course, boss." Lisbon replied calmly, but failed to hide the look of displeasure on her face. "We'll get right on that" She mumbled as her eyes met Jane's curious ones. This was going to be a long day.
Alright. That's chapter 1. Please leave a review and tell me what you think! :)
