19A/N: hi...don't hate me for this one, just an idea. Also disclaimer absolutely NO underage stuff will happen here, maybe referenced past sasuke and sakura when they were both underage but adult sasuke will keep his morals together long enough do not worry, everything will be consensual
It was a bitter winter day when he got the news. Sasuke had been at home while Sakura ran errands. He was cooking dinner for when she returned, he even had a bottle of wine picked out. They'd been starting to try for a baby and even if they didn't need any assistance, he wanted to set the mood a little. Because after being together for ten years, it was just nice to show that you cared, that you were still trying. He conceded that he should put in a little more effort that day in particular.
"I'm gonna run out to do some errands, okay? I forgot a few things at the store and I have to mail our bills. I'll be home soon though," she informed him as she gathered her coat and keys. She pressed a quick kiss to his cheek and was out the door.
Sasuke bid her goodbye and breathed a sigh of relief as soon as she was gone. At least she was talking to him. They'd gotten into a big argument over, honestly, nothing. They were both just worried about the future and started yelling, fueled purely by emotion. Sakura was already talking about schools and baby-proofing the house and Sasuke felt like he wasn't ready to even think about it. But he'd made Sakura wait a long time for him, he could never forget that, so he did think he should give in a little. He just didn't admit it then.
She called him a coward and he called her needy and the argument stopped because they were both too hurt, too tired to even continue.
He had set the table and brought everything to low heat when he got the call. It was his brother, Itachi. He almost told him to call back later because Sakura would be home for dinner soon and he wanted to be sure to greet her, maybe carry any bags inside for her. Itachi calling was nothing to be alarmed at since he often bothered Sasuke at home, but Sasuke's heart dropped to his stomach when Itachi started with, "I'm sorry, it's Sakura."
Itachi was a police officer, a first responder, and he was never one to waste his words. He wouldn't have called unless it was necessary.
Sasuke's body shut down and operated on auto pilot. He turned off the stove, knowing Sakura would yell at him if he burned their house down. He put the water pitcher back in the fridge because otherwise the ice would melt in the warmth of their home. He turned off a few lights to save energy. He got in his car and drove a few blocks to the address Itachi gave him. He doesn't remember when he started screaming.
What was most unfair was that the other driver came out unscathed. He had been drinking and drove in the wrong lane, hitting Sakura head on when she tried to make a left turn. The authorities watched the red light camera footage and said there was nothing that could have been done, she couldn't have seen him coming. The icy roads didn't help.
Sasuke wanted to kill the man so badly. He knew he would've if given the chance.
He stood watching the smoking remains of her car until Itachi clapped him on the shoulder and told him it was time to go home. They didn't let him see the body, there was no point. They had said their last goodbye when she walked out the door earlier that day.
He loses weight because he starts walking everywhere. Every time he passes the street corner where it happened, he curses under his breath and starts walking faster, but it feels like some invisible force is trying to get him to slow down. Why should he look? The pain is there even when he isn't thinking.
He cries. He cries more than he would like to admit. Sakura was everything to him and to have her ripped away from him so cruelly and so quickly made him feel like there was a hole where his heart should have been. Ten years together wasn't enough, only a lifetime would have come close to sufficing.
He hates himself. If he had gone instead, if he had held her back for just a moment to tell her he loved her, if they had been in the car together—he wouldn't be feeling this way.
The guilt, the sadness, the anger, the pain, all of it is there. It's expected given the way he loved Sakura.
He's at the grocery store of all places when it happens. He recognizes that he needs to take care of himself, just a little. People had been delivering food to his house, but mostly things that Sakura would've liked. He just wants a fucking sandwich. He thinks proudly to himself that Sakura would've been glad that he was trying. Maybe if he was good enough, he could get her back, some way, somehow.
He picked up a soft loaf of bread from the bottom shelf, thinking he'd just eat sandwiches for the entire week because why not. Then when he straightened up and looked down the aisle, he promptly dropped the loaf on the floor and his jaw went with it.
He had to be seeing things. There was just no way.
Standing in front of him was Sakura, looking just as sweet as the day they'd met.
"There you are," she says with a pretty smile, like she'd been looking for him.
A/N: I don't have everything figured out for this universe, but it'll be focused on SS rather than Sakura living her life (like will her parents know? Idk let's ignore that and focus on Sasuke's angst LOL) and while I'm interested in figuring this out, I also have no intentions of abandoning my other fics. Everything will just take some time for me to update :-)
