68Reconstructing Rome
By Indygodusk
Chapter 40
"I sometimes fancy ... that Rome ... will crowd everything else out of my heart."
NATHANIEL HAWTHORNE, The Blithedale Romance
About a week after Kindall woke up, Meredith was feeling mostly okay with the world when she noticed an annoying buzzing sound that refused to stop. She didn't want to stop working on her current problem but the sound just kept getting worse and worse. About to yell at someone, she looked up with a deep, angry breath and saw her computer screen flashing.
Breath whooshing out again, she sheepishly realized that she was the one to blame. She must've forgotten to turn off the reminder alarm about her weekly practice on the gun range with McLean. Of course, the practice wasn't happening anymore because he was still too freaked out by the memories to hang out with her in an enclosed space.
Irritated, she slapped the alarm off and went back to the engine schematic spread out on the table. At least McLean and King had stopped flinching when they ran into her unexpectedly, but Rigo still skittered back when seeing her. She'd hoped they'd be over it by now, but they still seemed to be avoiding her, the jerks.
Twenty minutes later, Dr. Kavanaugh stopped by her desk, his face screwed up with distemper. She'd been glad when he'd returned to Earth after the siege, but then he'd turned around and come back to Atlantis. Whatever gains in status or respect he'd hoped for with his absence hadn't materialized. Like a yo-yo, the unpopular scientist had requested reassignment back to Earth last month. It was frustrating because the man had actually shown several bursts of intelligence, he just didn't apply it consistently or very well and was a miserable, cowardly, and annoying human being without the genius to make such traits tolerable.
Unfortunately for him and everyone else who had to deal with him on Atlantis, the bureaucracy was taking forever to approve the transfer. Meredith found him more irritating with every interaction. Somehow he'd even offended Elizabeth and she worked hard not to hold a grudge against anybody. Meredith hoped they'd be able to finally ship Kavanaugh off for good the next time the Daedalus came back around.
"Dr. Mckay, I am a highly trained engineer deserving of respect, not your errand boy," Kavanaugh huffed, holding out a folded over note.
Arching a brow, she took the paper. "If you want respect, you have to earn it. So far you haven't. If you don't want to be an errand boy, don't run errands." Looking down dismissively, she unfolded the note. It was short and to the point, written with slanting letters in bold black ink.
Practice or Perish, Mckay.
The word perish had been underlined twice. An angry hiss escaped her clenched teeth like steam from a boiling kettle. How dare he?! McLean was the one who'd canceled practice to avoid her, not the other way around! Crumpling the note in her fist, she threw it into the trash.
Kavanaugh, the rat, looked a lot less annoyed after viewing her angry reaction. He put a hand over his mouth to hide a smirk and strolled out. If looks could kill he'd have a smoking hole in his back.
Logging out of her computer with sharp keystrokes, Meredith rolled up the schematic on the table and stowed it back in its cardboard tube for safety. Yanking her hair back into a ponytail she secured with a rubberband from the top of the nearest desk (an action she was sure to regret later when her hair ripped out on trying to remove it), she stomped off to confront McLean in person on the gun range.
When she stormed inside, ready to fire off a barrage of angry words, she found McLean nowhere to be found. In fact, the only person around was the sergeant on duty. He barely looked old enough to be legal, with long, skinny limbs and a protruding Adam's apple that kept bobbing as he swallowed uncomfortably beneath her angry glare.
"Where's McLean?" she snapped at him, angry at the thought of wasting her time practicing with guns when she could be doing more important things like saving the galaxy and discovering how stargates worked.
"He already left, ma'am." The kid wisely leaned back from her angry glare.
He obviously wasn't too bright though, because in the next instant the sergeant was on his feet and ushering her into a free lane to start shooting things. He was lucky she didn't shoot him. He handed her the largest caliber gun she was cleared to use. Shooting with that beast wasn't practical as she'd never carry something like that out in the field. She also couldn't get off more than three shots before her wrists started trembling like tree branches in high wind. However, even with ear protection, there was something viscerally appealing about the loud bangs thumping through her body and the huge holes the bullets left behind in the target sheets, even if, or perhaps especially when, her aim was off.
McLean sometimes pulled it out for her when she needed to work out her frustrations. Handing it to her must be a lucky guess on the kid's part. Unless McLean had planned this? But that would be nice and she didn't want to think of McLean as nice.
Just when she thought she couldn't hold up the gun anymore, no matter how much fun she was secretly having blowing targets to smithereens, she felt someone tap her left shoulder cautiously. She started to tense up when they tapped her left arm and slid into view. It was John. She blew out a breath and relaxed.
Carefully putting the gun down on the table in front of her, she turned to face him. "What do you want?" Her question was half-crabby and half-breathless.
"Can I help? You look like you're ready to shoot something smaller."
Meredith scowled and ticked up her chin. "I'd actually like to shoot someone larger," a certain Marine who looked like a black Mr. Clean in fact, "but I'm ready to leave."
"C'mon, you just got here and practice is important. I'll grab you something else while you catch your breath. We can shoot together." Smiling at her and not waiting for an answer, John left to talk to the young sergeant manning the gun cage by the door.
To get away she'd have to make it past both of them. Rolling her shoulders, Meredith grumbled under her breath and gave in. She'd have to make McLean pay later. Or track him down and make him get over his problems so he'd be friends with her again. That might require her to go out of her way to do something nice for him. How inconvenient. What would he even think was nice? Could she get away with being so irritating he couldn't avoid her anymore instead? One way or another, she was done with his avoidance. It had been almost two weeks. Wasn't that enough?
All thoughts of McLean disappeared as John returned. His happy expression as he came bounding back with more guns for both of them to shoot was too cute to resist. Besides, she secretly liked the way he put his arms around her to correct her stance and technique.
She paid attention to everything about John just a little too much considering they still hadn't talked about that kiss the night he'd given her Valentina. Or kissed again since then, though they had hung out every day and even done work in the same room a few times. Why hadn't he kissed her again? Was he waiting for her? She wanted him to make the next move. Maybe she should tell him that instead of getting more and more impatient and frustrated.
After practicing shooting, she found herself agreeing to eat dinner with John instead of going back to working on the engine schematic as she'd originally intended. John had a way of upsetting her plans, but she rarely regretted it. She enjoyed being alone with him too much.
As they cleaned up she noticed that John was anxious about something. Since he was trying to hide it, she didn't bother asking, assuming it had to do with his military duties. If something had happened to make Atlantis less safe and it wasn't urgent, she'd rather sleep well tonight and find out about it at the staff meeting tomorrow. Of course, he might also just be worried that the mess had run out of his favorite green salted chip things.
In the hall, they got into a spirited discussion comparing the capabilities of Russia's Mi-28 Havoc versus America's AH-64 Apache attack helicopters. It made her forget about her worries as she argued her position enthusiastically. John focused more on tactical function and handling while Meredith's arguments emphasized structure, since you obviously needed good structure to get good function.
Meredith was so caught up making sure she won the discussion that she didn't see James Kindall as they passed him in the hall until she accidentally whacked him with a sweeping gesture.
"Are you sure you should walking around yet?" she asked, looking James up and down critically. "You're still too pasty and those claw marks are barely healed."
"The zoologists tell me that claw marks are sexy," he said solemnly with twinkling eyes.
She scoffed and rolled her eyes at him. "The zoologists read too many paranormal romance novels."
"Well, a man still has to eat," Kindall said with an easy shrug, sending her a half-smile. "I'm on my way to the DFAC for dinner."
His expression cooled as his eyes drifted to John, who was standing pressed against her side with his hand tucked into the small of her back. She'd been too caught up in their debate to notice how much John was touching her. She generally tried not to pay too much attention to John's touches as a defense mechanism for her poor heart, though she failed more often than not.
Although John kept himself apart from most people, he made up for it with casual touches to those people he trusted. She was pretty sure he had no idea he was even doing it. Luckily Teyla and Ronon didn't seem to find anything odd about it because John got flustered when people pointed it out and tried to stop himself, making everything weird until he got over it.
It had added to the tension in her early days here in Atlantis because she'd kept seeing John go to touch her and then jerk back, barely stopping himself. Or he would touch her and then she'd have to glare at him because he'd lost that privilege. Once she was on his gate team and they'd settled back into friendship, one where they both pretended to ignore the sexual tension, John's unconscious touches had gone back to normal and she'd gone back to trying not to read too much into them or be too obvious arching into them like a stroked cat.
Meredith had known to the day when John had surrendered to the fact that they were going to be lifelong friends because that was the first time he'd touched her. John had grabbed her arm and pulled her over to look at something, followed by a shove during lunch and a pat on the back at dinner when she'd made a particularly good joke. Since most people avoided touching her, it had been strange at first, but she'd quickly gotten used to it. She liked the touches and liked that John liked touching her. It was better for her heart not to think about it more deeply than that.
"Colonel Sheppard," James said evenly.
"Sergeant Kindall," John said, their eyes clashing despite the even tones of voice.
As far as Meredith knew, James liked John and vice versa, so she wasn't really sure why tension suddenly crackled through the air. "Why are you guys looking at each other like that? Is it a military thing? A guy thing?"
When neither one answered she waved her hand through the air. "Whatever, nevermind. James, we're on our way to dinner too. Do you want us to walk with you to make sure you don't collapse along the way or get abducted by the zoologists for some pagan sex ritual?"
"The zoologists are nice. He'd probably enjoy himself," John said in a pleasant voice touched with just a hint of strain.
Meredith wrinkled her nose and gave John the side-eye. "Nice? Who wants nice? Unless you're a prepubescent choirboy."
Huffing, James shook his head and looked away. "Nah, don't worry about me. I'm still a Marine. I won't let myself get abducted by any zoologist. Well, not unless they're both naughty and hot." He winked and leered at Meredith.
She gave him an unimpressed look. "Fine, but don't come crying to me if you get into trouble. Besides, I'm telling you now that there are no zoologists hotter than the ladies in engineering. Like attracts like." She dusted off her shoulder and smirked cockily.
James grinned at her. "Oh, I noticed."
John twitched.
Darting a quick glance at John, James chuckled and leaned forward, looked at her through his lashes for some reason. "Have a nice dinner, Meredith. I'll see you tomorrow night for our date."
John's hand on her back closed into a fist. When she looked over at him, his expression was strangely flat.
She wasn't sure why James had lingered on the word "date," unless he wanted to hide what was going on from John as his commanding officer. James had "somehow" broken his laptop again (she was sure it was while losing at video games) and was too embarrassed to admit it to the quartermaster since this was the third time in two months and he'd been in a coma for part of that. He also had several reports that were almost overdue because he'd been laid up in the infirmary and typed slower than an arthritic sloth. Slow except when videogames were involved, that is.
The military guys got so into playing that they slammed the keys to make their virtual guns fire faster and angrily shoved the laptops away when losing. James was pretty even-tempered in real life, but not so much in the virtual world. Maybe because it was safe for a big man to lose his temper there. Of course, she'd learned about his virtual temper because she got very competitive with videogames too and had beaten the pants off James the last time they'd played. It might've been a factor in his pounding his laptop so hard that it broke. He'd vowed virtual revenge as soon as she fixed his machine. She'd smiled sweetly and agreed to fix his laptop so they could have a rematch… as soon as he got his reports typed up and turned in. The pain on his face had made her feel very big-sisterly and reminded her of good times with Jeannie, though Jeannie might not agree.
"Sure, see you tomorrow night," Meredith agreed with a nod.
"Sergeant," John said coldly in clear dismissal.
"Colonel."
John nudged Meredith forward and increased their pace until they'd left James behind, turned the corner, and reached the transporter by themselves.
However, once in the transporter, John didn't direct them towards the DFAC. Taking an audible breath, John keyed in a different section of the city, moving his body to block the screen so she couldn't quite see what destination he'd selected.
"Where are we going?" she asked, frowning.
Not answering, John nudged her out into the corridor. Both ends were blocked off by locked doors. It looked familiar. Very familiar in fact, though she hadn't been there in months.
"Oh," she said softly, feeling strangely off-balance.
Shoulders tight, John watched her reaction from the corner of his eye as he input the code to open the locked door leading outside to the private pier. The surrounding towers had been abandoned when she first discovered this place so this area was hidden from view from most of Atlantis. She'd thought it a secret from all of Atlantis until John had told her that he could see the edge of the pier from the corner of his new office's balcony.
It was how he'd known she'd built him a Ferris wheel before she'd decided if she was going to tell him or not.
"I wasn't sure if you ever even used the Ferris wheel." Her voice sounded weaker than she liked but her chest felt too tight to draw in enough air to make it louder. Seeing the small table complete with tablecloth that John had set for two didn't help her equilibrium.
Ushering her out with a hand on her shoulder, John secured the door behind them and led her over. Two covered trays sat on the table. "I come out here whenever I can sneak away. Riding the Ferris wheel you built me is one of the ways I stay sane out here. I wish I'd had it last year after the Genii invaded. I probably wouldn't have pissed off so many people in the days coming down from that incident."
Looking away and clearing his throat, he pulled out her chair and helped her scoot in. With a different man, she might refuse the help because he'd read something into it about her being weak. However this was John, so she didn't need to posture. He knew she was smart and capable. From him, the chair thing was a gesture of respect and care. She liked it.
"How did you get the table set up so fast for dinner? You were with me the whole time in the gun range and I didn't see you call anybody." She looked down and ran her fingers across the nap of the dark blue tablecloth. It was patterned with small, interlocking diamonds. A soft breeze fluttered the edges against her legs.
Meredith was doing her best not to jump to conclusions, but this really looked like a date. It looked like a Date with a capital D. If it wasn't, she knew her heart would end up bruised and hurting.
She should just be brave and ask John what he was doing, but she wanted it too much, so she didn't.
Licking his lips, John took the cover off the first of two silver trays, tapped it to turn off the warming element, and set it aside. It held two plates of tasty-looking mystery meat in dark brown gravy with orange and yellow carrots coated in flecks of green herbs and something shiny that was hopefully real butter.
The trays were technology the original expedition had repurposed from the Ancients. They'd probably had a different original purpose but no one had figured out what and once the kitchens had co-opted them for take-out the scientists had been content to move on to other mysteries while enjoying food kept at the proper temperature so it tasted fresh and wouldn't grow harmful bacteria even hours after it had been forgotten in the pursuit of higher knowledge.
"I set this up before I went looking for you and found you in the gun range," John told her as he sat down. He uncovered the second tray, which had been set to stay cold and held sliced melon and a single red jello cup. Meredith bit her lip at seeing her favorite red jello, something the mess had been out of for much too long. That John had found it for her had to mean something. Didn't it?
The smell of the gravy curled up pleasantly in her nostrils and made her stomach growl. John sent her a quick smile and passed her an empty plate. "I heard that. Go ahead and dig in." He grabbed his own plate and started dishing up his food.
Opening and closing her mouth, Meredith decided to eat now and ask questions later. Eating was easy and the answers might not be. She speared a piece of meat and plopped it into her mouth, letting out a faint moan as it practically disintegrated on her tongue, it was so tender. John took a bite and hummed in agreement. Their eyes met in mutual appreciation while their mouths were busy chewing.
The conversation started up once they started in on the carrots and before she knew it all of the food was gone except for the single red jello cup. "I'll fight you for it," she told him half-seriously. She hadn't had red jello in months. She didn't know how John and Ronon kept finding rare treats on Atlantis but she needed to get in on that action.
"You're on," John said, surprising her since she'd expected him to chivalrously offer her the whole cup.
John held his hand out perpendicular to the table with his thumb extended. "Thumb war?" The corners of his mouth twitched up.
Eyes narrowing to hide their mirth, Meredith took his fingers and raised her thumb to match his. "You think to win against the Roman empire? Your hand may be bigger, but my fingers are more feisty."
John's teeth flashed and his eyes hooded. "I like feisty."
Before she could respond to that provocative comment he began counting and moving his thumb from side to side. "One, two, three, four, I declare a thumb war."
Their thumbs jumped and clashed, wrestling for dominance as they tried to pin each other. It remained relatively civil for about five seconds and then Meredith stood up to get better leverage and almost pinned John's thumb. "Ha!"
John laughed, shoved the table out of the way with a screech, and twisted his arm to the side, narrowly escaping her pin. Fingers getting sweaty, she tried to outfox him but his fingers had a longer reach, even with him still sitting down. The only reason he hadn't pinned her yet was because her sweaty thumb kept slipping out of his grip and she had no compunction about cheating, but her fingers were tiring and getting sore.
Seeing the writing on the wall, Meredith twisted around and plopped down onto John's lap, torquing his arm awkwardly. While he was still surprised she pinned his thumb down and trapped it with her free hand. "And I win!"
Dropping his head onto the curve of her shoulder, John started laughing almost too hard to speak. "Ch-cheater!" he gasped.
Giggling, she let go of his hand and threw her arms up into the air. "All's fair in love and Jello!" Reaching out, she grabbed the jello cup and tore off the foil lid, tossing it aside. She started to stand but John grabbed her around the waist and pulled her back down onto his lap, pressing her back against his chest.
"Not fair," he breathed hotly in her ear, sending a shiver down her spine. "Cheaters have to share." The thumb on her stomach rubbed in a slow circle. Her stomach trembled inside. She wondered if he could feel it. Thought randomly of Prince singing about doves crying and having too much pride.
John snagged a spoon off the table and slid it into the red jello, lifting the first bite to her lips. Heart racing, Meredith opened her mouth and closed her lips around the spoon. John slowly dragged it out and she swallowed blindly. She couldn't have said what it tasted like. John leaned over her shoulder and took the next bite for himself, taking the spoon that was still wet from her mouth and sliding it between his lips. He was pressed against her so closely that she could feel the movement of him swallowing through her shoulders and back.
What were they doing?
John lifted another bite to her lips and she closed her mouth around the spoon, tonguing the bottom and sliding her lips off slowly. This time, she tasted. Beneath the delicious artificial strawberry flavor, she tasted John. John's mouth. That or she imagined it. Either way, the memory of his kisses slid like fire down her throat and settled in her middle like a burning ember. She'd felt almost sated a moment ago but now she felt needy and ravenous.
Whatever they were doing, Meredith didn't want to stop.
Three shared bites later and the jello was gone. Meredith's heart pounded in her throat as she stared at the empty cup. She licked her lips. They were sticky and sweet.
Meredith wanted to kiss John Sheppard and she didn't want to stop. She was sick of being cautious. Maybe Prince's song was warning her that she was being too demanding and too bold, that she was never satisfied. And maybe it wasn't coincidence that John had brought her here to the Ferris wheel, the monument she'd built to how much she loved John Sheppard even when he'd abandoned her and broken her heart. Did it really matter that he would leave one day? That he wouldn't go all-in for her? She'd go on loving him either way. Why shouldn't she take what pleasures she could get while they were on offer?
Because she was scared, whimpered her scars.
Needing a moment, Meredith pressed forward against the pressure of John's hands until they slid across her hips and lifted away. She stood and took two steps forward, dropping the empty jello cup onto the tray. The food was gone now but it had been delicious while it had lasted. This meal would be a good memory.
Maybe good memories would be enough to tide her over later and maybe it was time to be grateful for what she could get instead of being miserable over all she couldn't. Besides, greedy passion had always been more fun than asceticism and self-imposed misery. Indulging in passion with John would be a gift. It would make her happy and didn't she deserve to be happy?
Taking a quick breath, she braced a hand on the table, put on a flirtatious expression, and turned to meet John's green eyes. Hopefully, it looked flirtatious. She was rather out of practice. "So did you bring me here to ask me to take a turn on your Ferris wheel?" She didn't always have to be blunt and it sounded nicely coy tripping off her tongue. She almost wagged her eyebrows but thought it might be too over the top, even for her.
John tilted his head to the side and smiled, the edges of his eyes crinkling. "Actually, yes… and no." He cleared his throat and sat up in the chair, the green of his eyes darkening as his voice strengthened and deepened. "One turn isn't enough. The view changes as you go up and down, but the seat gives you the security to lean back and enjoy the ride. You built me a Ferris wheel but riding alone isn't enough anymore."
Brow crinkling, she tilted her head. "John, you're losing me. Is that a metaphor? I'm an engineer, not an English major. What are you saying?"
Rubbing his hands up and down his legs, John cleared his throat. "I want to be your friend, is that okay?"
Disappointment stabbed through her. She breathed in slowly. "Yes, of course," she said through numb lips.
"I want to be your best friend, is that okay?"
Disappointment turned to confusion and edged towards exasperation. "Sure, I mean, I'm not giving up James—that's Kindall—and Miko's very important to me too, but John, where are you going with this?"
"Rome, I want to be your—your dash Sheppard." Blood draining from his face, John looked at her with wide eyes. He might've stopped breathing.
Blinking at him, Meredith felt cranky. What was he freaking out about? They'd gone from what she thought was flirting and rekindling their romance to strange metaphors and vows of friendship. She wondered if John would pull out some colored yarn in a moment and start braiding friendship bracelets.
Meredith's dove was definitely crying. Stupid Prince song. She wanted to catch that dove and stuff a cork down its throat.
Sucking in a breath, she grabbed onto her patience. No matter how weird John was being, he was still important to her, and obviously this weird conversation was important to him for some reason. "You want to be Dash Sheppard, like a nickname? Dash because you run fast?" she asked carefully. "I mean, I'm not sure I see you as a Dash. When I think running, I think Ronon. John is pretty firmly cemented in my brain as a name for you, that and a few other four-letter words not appropriate in polite company. Dash seems kind of stupid and I doubt I'll remember it, but if it's important to you maybe you could make it your military call sign or—or something?"
Exhaling explosively, John slumped forward and ran his hands over his face. He was laughing… or crying. Hopefully laughing. She didn't think her calling him stupid was worth crying over.
"Are you okay?" She shifted from foot to foot, unsure of what to do. She didn't think anything she'd said needed an apology.
John smoothed his hands back over his hair, revealing a dry face creased with humor. Definitely laughter then. Good.
"Let me try this again," John said with a wry smile. "I want to be your dash Sheppard as in Mckay-dash-Sheppard."
A bomb went off in Meredith's head as all of her background lines of thought turned to smoke. At least the dove blew up too. She tried to process what John had just said. Tried to make it make sense.
"I'm even willing to change my middle name to Rodney," he coaxed, looking up at her through his lashes. She realized that the twitching of his lips was from nerves, not humor.
"My middle name's Meredith," she said on autopilot, still reeling. Was this a joke?
"I'm willing to take on Meredith if that's what it takes. Whatever I need to do to get you to agree to marry me."
All the strength in her legs abandoned her. Collapsing into her chair, Meredith stared across at John. "Are you trying to bribe me into marrying you?" Her voice squeaked on the m-word.
"Only if it's working."
She stared at him in silence.
Hiding trembling fingers beneath his thighs, she could see the whites of John's eyes as he waited for her response. His pulse visibly throbbed on his throat.
Meredith's brain was still trying to reboot. "Is this because of what happened with my memories?"
"Sort of," John said, swallowing. "It destroyed some assumptions I'd made and clarified for me what's really important. It was a much-needed kick in the pants." He gave a half-smile and shrugged, trying for cavalier and almost making it.
"For example?" She leaned forward and clasped her hands between her knees, waiting to hear something that would make her wildly spinning reality make sense. "Because just a minute ago we weren't even dating and now it sounds like you want to marry me."
"We sort of have been dating ever since you forgave me but you just didn't realize it. I was stealth dating you." Seeing her expression, John hurriedly added, " But nevermind that. Marriage. I really do. With you. Just—just listen. Please."
Sliding off the chair onto his knees, John sat back on his heels and put his hands on his thighs, looking up and catching her gaze with an expression of vulnerability and boldness. "You're my Rome. Nothing and no one else compares to you. It's silly and stupid to pretend otherwise and I'm done with it. Make me your General or make me your gladiator, just let me be your partner in life. I'm not avoiding the uncertainty in our future anymore. I'm not letting fear hold me back. I want you any way I can get you and the more of you the better. I want to be all in. I love you. That's why I'm putting all my cards on the table and asking you to marry me. This is me fighting for you, fighting for us. There are no guarantees of a smooth ride. Bumps both up and down are inevitable, but this is me trying to put us first the best way I can think of. I want to give you all of my tomorrows and share in yours. I love you. Say you'll have me, Rome." By the end of his speech, John was leaning so far forward his chest was almost touching her knees. The emotion in his voice made her skin prickle hotly with the intensity.
"John." Meredith pressed her lips together and swallowed hard. Her eyes stung and her pulse pounded in her ears. She licked her lips and realized that the shocked mess inside her head had distilled down into a rising tide of happiness. He'd stopped running. John loved her and wanted to marry her. For keeps. All in. He was willing to fight to be with her.
When she didn't immediately follow his name up with any other declarations, too busy cataloging the deluge of emotions his declaration had engendered, John's expression fell. His eyes dropped and everything about his posture went tight. "If it's too late—if you and Kindall—if you love him instead… I understand. It's fine. I won't get in the way."
Huffing, Meredith leaned forward with her elbows on her knees and shook her head. "When he comes back from fighting the Emperor on the Death Star, you mean? Because it's not like that at all. He's my brother." She waited for a beat before adding dryly, "Except he's not Luke Skywalker, you still aren't Han Solo, and there are no fuzzy Ewoks around unless you squint and count Valentina." She waited for him to look up before rolling her eyes. "Any love Kindall and I share is completely platonic. You and I are a lot of things, John, but platonic is not one of them."
John rose to his knees with a quick inhale, placing his face mere inches from hers. The look in his eyes burned. "Rome, I know I'm not as smart as you, but I am smart and you find smart sexy. I'm intelligent, sexy, thoughtful, sexy, an amazing pilot and team leader, loyal, funny, and… sexy." With each word his grin grew along with the heat building between their bodies.
Sternly controlling the curl of her lips, Meredith slid forward so she was sitting on the edge of her chair. "You've got some good qualities, but subtle isn't one of them. Nor is the ability to ask a question clearly. I'm also concerned if you're sexy enough…" she dipped her head to breathe into his ear, "for me." Then she slid back just enough for him to see the challenging arch of her eyebrow.
"I am definitely sexy enough for you. Say you'll marry me and I'll spend the rest of my life proving it. Say yes, Rome. Say yes." The look on John's face right then could've convinced her to agree to anything.
"Yes." Her voice almost broke and she had to swallow hard. "Now, are you going to kiss me as the music swells or am I going to have to go looking for some other half-witted, scruffy-looking nerf herder to marry?"
They were both grinning as their lips met in a joyous kiss. Meredith threw her arms around John's shoulders and slid off the chair into his lap with a bit too much enthusiasm, sending him crashing over onto the ground on his back. Their teeth clacked.
"Ouch, my head," John laughed, rubbing where he'd knocked it into the edge of the chair.
"Ouch, my knuckles," Meredith grumbled back, pulling them out from behind his back and flexing them to make sure she hadn't done any serious damage and checking for blood.
John abruptly flipped them over so Meredith was on the bottom with his arm cushioning her head. He scattered kisses across her nose and cheeks. "Let's kiss each other better." His mouth pressed against hers and lingered in a way that made Meredith's heart practically burst in happiness.
When the radio in John's ear squawked, Meredith dropped her head back with an annoyed groan and slung an arm around his neck. John braced himself above her on his hands in a pushup and growled, opening the connection. She was close enough to hear the voice coming out of his radio. "Colonel Sheppard? This is Major Lorne, over."
"Yes? This is Sheppard, but I'm kind of in the middle of something." John's voice, she noticed smugly, was a trifle breathless.
The bulge of his biceps in front of her face proved irresistible and she slid her fingers under the hem of his sleeves, tickling her fingers over the unexpectedly soft skin stretching over his hard muscles and up the warm curve of his shoulders and back.
"Sir, the team you sent out to track down those advanced handguns just got back and I think you're going to want to talk to them. They didn't find the source of the guns but—"
Biting her lip, eyes going heavy-lidded, Meredith lightly scratched her nails down John's shoulders and arms while throwing a leg up around his thigh.
John's breath hitched and she got a heated look in return. 'Behave' he mouthed sternly, though his hand slid down to trace the curve of her hip and thigh. The curve of his lips softened into desire as he sucked in his breath and pulled her closer.
"—the informant they talked to said that these are the same traders who've been asking questions about a Colonel John Sheppard and offering a reward for information on either your home gate address or your capture."
"Lorne, is this something that needs immediate action, or is it something I can follow up on in the morning?"
"Colonel? I mean, no, sir, it's not urgent. Their informant gave them the slip and is long gone. You just told me to contact you the next time someone came back with news of the bounty on your head."
Meredith frowned, Lorne's wording sounding a lot more serious than John's off-hand mention of the issue in staff meetings.
"Thank you, Lorne. I'll deal with the report tomorrow and trust your judgement until then. I just got engaged, so unless there's something else you feel needs my personal attention, I'd really like to get back to that." The hand on Meredith's hip squeezed and John gave her a predatory look that made her very aware of the press of his body over hers. Meredith liked the feeling so she tightened her legs, locking him in place.
"Engaged? Wow, congratulations, sir! And congrats to Dr. Mckay. I mean, I assume it's Mckay?"
"Yes, of course it's Mckay," John told him crankily.
"Right, well, congrats again. I'll route all problems to my com tonight and try to keep you from any more interruptions. Lorne out." John confirmed and the radio shut off.
"Now, where were we?" John rumbled, dropping his lips to her throat to place a series of sucking kisses down her neck to her open collar.
Head falling back, she saw the Ferris wheel silhouetted against the gold and pink clouds of the sunset. "Hey, I have a better idea," she panted, sliding her fingers through John's hair and tugging to get him to lift his head.
"What could possibly be better than this?" John asked, capturing her hand and bringing it to his mouth to nibble on her fingers.
Looking up at him with a wide smile, Meredith told him, "I've never made out with someone on a Ferris wheel before. Wanna be my first?" She wagged her brows.
Lips parting on a soundless gasp and cheeks flushing red, John looked down at her with awe. "You are the most perfect woman in the world. I love you so much, Rome." Pressing a hard kiss on her lips, he pulled her up, interlocked their hands, and tugged her forward. "We'll have to make out in all of the buckets to determine which one we like best. And for science! I hope you don't have somewhere else to be tonight," he sent her a steamy look, "because I'm not in the mood to rush through the research with my soon-to-be wife."
John opened the bar for the bottom seat of the Ferris wheel and ushered her on, snagging the remote control with his other hand.
Lounging back, Meredith crossed her legs and smirked. "I suppose if you're going to be my husband, I should give you the chance to convince me it's worth my while and demonstrate your grasp of the scientific process." She waved her hand regally. "Whenever you're ready to start."
John landed into the seat next to her with a bounce and started the Ferris wheel, catching her in his arms and pulling her close as the bucket lurched and sent her sliding. "Baby, I was born ready," he said against her lips before doing something with his hands and tongue that made her swoon and retaliate as soon as she regained her wits. She made him repeat it in each bucket seat as an experimental control.
It wasn't until much much later that she realized she hadn't even noticed or minded him calling her baby.
It must be true love.
The End
(for now)
AN: Yay! If Rome was season 1 of a TV series, this story encompassed seasons 2, 3, & maybe even 4. And so we reach the end of the story I had pre-written before the pandemic quarantine craziness started. I wrote this chapter in late February (about 3 months ago) while sitting in the back corner of a Chick-fil-a with a very large Coke Zero, hashbrown rounds, and a bagel chicken breakfast sandwich. I have saved a lot of money by not eating as much fast food in the last few months, that's for sure. I'm so grateful for all of you who've read along and left me comments! Especially you, katmom! Reviews are really important to me. They let me know all my hard effort means something to you guys and is appreciated. It's been really difficult to find the time, much less the energy, to write new material with all of the stress I've been under, so I'm glad I had this big backlog I could just edit and post. I wish I had more already written, but all I have is the rest of the outline and 1700 words of the next chapter (a conversation with Miko and a meeting between Mckay and Weir) that won't do you any good without the followup. So there's still one more "season" of this story left in my head. I've had the idea for the main conflict in it since I first thought of the plot of Rome back in 2016. Since I'm not sure when it's going to get written, I decided to end this story here instead of leaving it open for who knows how long. When I post the final arc it will be as a new story/season in the series. Thank you again for reading my story. If you're interested in having me write the third story, please let me know. Hugs! You are all wonderful people!
