"HOT! HOT!"

I turn around. To see Sarada, fanning her open mouth with her hand, eyes teary.

"Oh my god, Sarada! He just fried the tempura!" Sakura runs to grab a bottle from the fridge. Pouring the cold water into a small bowl.

We were busy setting the table, neither of us noticed when she sneaked in, grabbing a burning hot tempura.

Sarada sits there, tongue dipped in cold water as we finish gathering everything on the table. The cake Sakura made, with whipped cream and fresh ripe strawberries, Sarada's favourite prawn tempura, corn, egg and mayo fried rice, meatballs in sweet and sour gravy and chocolate pudding. Since her first birthday, we haven't celebrated together. That's why we wanted to have this small domestic celebration, just the three of us even though we're going to have a party on Saturday. We did the preparations on Sunday, deshelling and deveining the prawns, making the meatballs and then freezing everything, before going to Sakura's parents' place for her birthday dinner. Last night, Sakura made the cake since it's not my area of expertise, I took care of the pudding. Today, when I got home, picking up Sarada from her grandparents' with a teddy bear almost twice her size, a set of modelling clay and a big box of her favourite animal shaped chocolates, Sakura was already in the kitchen cooking the rice. In the end, we managed somehow. It was a little hectic, but it was worth it. It's our little girl's birthday after all.

Sakura brings out the party hats I love seeing on Sarada but despise on myself but having no choice, I put it on. We set the cake and light the big red 5 candle in the middle and the firework candles all around. Sarada's eyes shine in joy and she claps merrily.

"Blow the candles first, Sarada," Sakura gives her the small knife, "And make a wish."

Sarada blows with all the power her little lungs have to offer, blowing out the red candle. "I want to be together with Mama and Papa forever!"

"Eh? Sarada, you cannot say your wishes out loud. It won't come true if you do."

"My wish won't come true?" Sarada's face turns sad, tears pooling in her eyes.

"Don't worry baby," Sakura wraps an arm lovingly around her, "It will come true if you say it in your mind once. Try saying it. Close your eyes and say it in your mind."

Sarada squeezes her eyes shut, eyebrows drawing close as she concentrates.

Getting back together was what I had wanted, what Sakura had wanted. But most importantly, it was what Sarada had wanted. And every time I'm reminded of how much this means to Sarada, I feel this desperation inside my chest to do anything, absolutely anything to protect our small family. I'll never let any force in the world to break us apart ever again.

After the firework candles burn out, I remove them from the cake, and we sing happy birthday, I mean it's mostly Sakura who sings as I clap along while Sarada cuts the cake. We feed her the cake, and give our gifts. A building blocks set from me and story books from Sakura. Sakura had teased me saying I picked up a very engineer-like gift while I pointed out that her own gift was very much a proofreader-like. But jokes apart, right now she's at that age where these gifts are perfect for her. Building blocks or the modelling clay her grandparents gave her. And story books as well. Sarada loves story books but she can't read them yet. So, we make her read the title, and then read the story to her. As she gets busy with her presents, Sakura takes a picture. I know she'll send it to her birth mother. Allowing her a few sneak peeks of her granddaughter's growth, something she missed with her daughter. Sarada is dressed in the red dress that arrived from Suna last week. Along with Sakura's own birthday gift, the lime green dress I didn't completely take off while making love to her that night. The memory makes me smirk. She sure enjoyed her birthday.

"Sarada, come let's eat," Sakura calls out with a smile. And Sarada runs back to the table excitedly.

.

.

.

Sakura moves closer to me, snuggling into my chest,. Three months ago, when I moved here permanently, we bought a new bed. A bigger one. "Sarada was so happy."

"Yes, she couldn't stop smiling."

She falls silent for a while.

"You know Sasuke, sometimes it feels like a dream. Too good to be true."

"What?"

I try to see her face but she prefers to stay hidden in my chest.

"I had thought we, Sarada and I, were a mistake to you. A failed past, that you couldn't wait to wash your hands off. Like those bitter medicines that leave a bad aftertaste in your mouth. I knew when you found the right one, ready to start your life over again, you'll cut us off. And it just broke my heart. No matter how hard I tried, I never could prepare myself for it. And yet, it wasn't me I was worried about. I'm an adult. Besides, I had a part to play in all that happened. A very big part. But Sarada... she was innocent... she had done nothing wrong... And it broke my heart thinking about how she had to live her life being an unwanted burden... discarded by her own father just because she came from me... I felt like... like I had given her a cursed life..." her voice starts to shake, fingers digging into my nightshirt. "I still find it hard to believe that..." she sniffs, "Instead of tossing us away... you chose to take us back."

She starts to sob. Her body trembles.

"You asked me why I didn't try to stop you that night... And the truth is... I wanted to. I wanted to so bad, Sasuke... Every single cell in me was screaming, asking me to stop you. To beg you to stay, to not leave us. I- I can never put it into words... What I felt at that moment... I did want you to stay... I did... But not because I asked you to... Because you wanted to... I wanted you to choose us... I didn't want to impose ourselves upon you... Didn't want to overstay our welcome..."

"Sakura-"

I wrap my arms tightly around her.

"I'm sorry," I gently comb her hair with my fingers, "For everything."

She looks at me, I wipe away her tears with my thumb.

"I love you," she says all of a sudden. Taking me by surprise.

Instead of saying it out in words, I give her a long kiss on the forehead. "I don't think I can ever make you understand what it means to me. To get you and Sarada back."

I take her hand, smaller and softer, and weave our fingers together.

"I don't expect it to be easy. By now, I know that there'll always be hardships. But I'm fine with it as long as I can return home to you and Sarada at the end of the day. That's the most important lesson I learnt from all this mess."

"Sasuke!" she hugs me, crying into my nightshirt.

I gently rub my hand on her back in an attempt to soothe her but I can't resist the temptation to tease her a little.

"You're such a crybaby."

"What?" she looks at me, an eyebrow raised.

"You heard me."

She glares at me for a few seconds before breaking into a laughter. Making me chuckle too.

"By the way," she moves close to me once again, eyes radiating warmth, she simply loves cuddling, "I was talking to Mum. I think you've left a good impression on her with your devoted father picking up his daughter everyday act." She giggles.

"It's not an act."

"Stop trying to act smug," she pinches my arm.

"Ow! That hurt!"

"Oh? I'm so sorry," she bats her eyelashes at me, "I'll kiss it better."

She used to do that back then too.

In ways things are very similar to how they used to be before everything fell apart. Making me feel like all these years, all this turmoil, it never even happened. But at the same time, now there's a deep sense of peace, a calm and serene feeling that only comes after the storm has passed.

The past few years have granted me the ability to look at the bigger picture. Of course it's sad. When you have to let one thing go in order to keep another. But at least you get to keep one, and that's quite great in itself. The twenty one year old me was too fixated on my dreams and was devastated when I saw them crumbling down. So, quite naturally, I failed to notice that I was given the key to unlock some newer, bigger dreams. Looking back at it now, a thousand broken dreams fade into nothingness in front of the joy of having Sarada, having my own little family.

"What are you thinking about?" she wraps her arms around my torso.

"Having Sarada made me grow up in so many ways. It's kind of like my world view shifted."

Until she was born, we were the main characters, the world was revolving around us. But once you hold this new, innocent, fragile life you brought into this world, you give up that position to them. And you move to the sidelines, becoming their stepping stone because they can't make it without you. And yet, it feels so fulfilling.

"Aaah. That it does. Back then, everything used to be about us. Do you remember how you used to say you'd buy a piano once we had money?" she laughs.

"Very clearly."

She giggles, "We were so wild back then. The dreams we had were so different."

"Well yeah. I'm not saying I'm not tempted by the idea of seeing you splayed on top of one," she blushes red, "But from a financial point of view, at the moment, I think there are other things we should be considering first."

"Ummm," she thinks with a finger pressed on her chin, "How about we buy a car? I think you and me together can afford one. I mean we'll have to save for a while."

"A car?" I hadn't exactly consider that, "It actually is a good idea."

"Right? Especially now that Sarada will be going to school. And we could go on small family trips during weekends," she speaks excitedly, "I can't forget how happy Sarada was when we went to the beach."

We went on a short weekend trip to the beach about two months ago. Our first family trip ever. Sarada looked like she'd explode with happiness, running around the beach in her cute little bathing suit, plunging into the water, making it impossible for us to move our eyes away for a second. And she also discovered her love for fresh seafood. All in all, it felt like a well deserved reward after the hell we went through.

"Yes, a car would come handy at times. Besides..." I whisper into her ear, "It'll give us other options too. More than one. Front seat, back seat, the bonnet..."

I feel her shiver against me.

"Are you getting hot already?"

"Sh-shut up," she pouts, "You always tease me like this."

"Your fault for getting so worked up every time."

"I can't help it."

"Well, yeah. I am irresistible," I shrug.

She punches me softly on the chest.

.

.

.

I watch Sakura from the kitchen. Moving her body in harmony with the music playing in the speaker while dusting the books on the wall shelf. Smiling and humming along. There's something very pure about the scene, something I can't quite pin down.

"Mama!" I hear Sarada's voice and then she runs to Sakura.

"Sarada!" Sakura's face overflows with smile and she crouches down, holding Sarada's little hands in hers, and the two of them sway their bodies in synchrony with the music. A smile makes its way to my face at that sight.

"Ah! Sasuke!" Sakura's eyes spot me. "Sarada! Go, bring Papa. Go! Go!"

Before I can say a word, Sarada runs to me, breathless. "Papa dance!" She tugs at my pajama.

I chuckle as I pick her up from the ground, "You want to dance?"

"Yes!"

I hold her right hand in mine and mimic dance moves, "Like this?"

"Hihihi," she giggles happily.

I walk up to Sakura and the three of us dance together in our little living area. Smiling and happy, just happy. The rest of the world erased from our mind.

My eyes fall upon the two mugs on the small niche. Pink and blue, decorated with golden crack patterns, pink, blue and red synthetic flowers protruding out from them.

I was wrong back then. That wasn't our happy ending. Neither is this. The story has just started. We still have a long long way to go before we can reach the ending. And it's not even the ending I'm bothered about anymore. I'm just going to enjoy this journey to the fullest...

---

Note: *peeks from behind a wall: Henlo! Sorry I've been gone I had big plans for July and had meant to finish this fic by Sasuke's birthday. But things happened and my worst trauma made the grandest comeback. The beginning of the month was spent handling that, then I was just starting to get a little better and one of my favourite actors passed away in a suspected suicide which I didn't take well of course. I'm still not okay but I'm managing somehow thanks to Sleeping At Last and Taylor Swift's music, the way both of them dropped a new song/album this month it almost feels like the universe's way of asking me to be okay. So I'm writing. I'm tired of feeling down. I need to give me a reason to like myself and finishing this chapter already gives me a sense of accomplishment.

I hope you all are holding on in this difficult times. My hair is growing it's 1.5 cm long now and my sister is supposed to get married in six months. If the wedding really happens, I'll struggle to come up with a hairstyle lol.

Lots and lots and lots of love,

June ❤️

[28.07.2020]