63Chapter 4: Dinner Part I.
'Would you like to come over to my place for dinner?'
As an Yukinoshita, she was told to never second guess her decisions. But Yukino found herself mulling the consequences of her latest endeavour. She had asked her lover – no, the word lover held such consequential connotations which made her grow fearful of the future. And the use of the word boyfriend was lacking in specialty and didn't show permanence at the present. Hence, for the time being, until she was certain beyond a reasonable doubt, that the boy she liked, liked her back in return, she would address him using those romance inducing titles only in the sanctum sanctorum that was her mind, with high intellectual capacity and logical reasoning capabilities.
Of course, others were more than welcome to draw their own conclusions about their relationship. In fact, Yukino found herself liking that more, even though she loathed to admit it, there were times when she basked in the feelings of others – her insufferable classmates mostly who saw him despite both their immense displeasure– who sounded more sure about their relationship, then them combined.
For the time being, Hikigaya Hachiman was still the boy she liked and as tedious and as long as that phrase was, it was still far more suitable to denote her feelings for him without forcing his feelings on her. It was all for the best to take the slow approach before falling in love without no escape plan in motion and knowing the two of them, it would take time to progress into the more serious aspects of a romantic relationship.
In other words this was dinner.
Sex was not on the table.
Yet.
Hachiman grumbled. He had come to her apartment as invited and as far as Yukino could tell, he had come on time. Five minutes early, but that didn't make much of a case or drew the right conclusions. Not enough information, Yukino concluded. He looked like his usual self, not over enthusiastic and not overeager. He looked like a boy who had come, expecting a free dinner. The fact that the cuisine would be exquisite and superb, almost restaurant like in quality catered to his hunger, not doubt.
But then he wanted to go repay her kindness and the hospitality of a free meal and decided to go the extra mile and that is when alarm bells went off in her head like a loud klaxon call.
"Where did I put that stuff?"
"…."
He had come empty handed and she hadn't thought much about it at first. It was not customary to bring flowers or a small box of chocolates or some other small gift which she might appreciate and consider as a token of appreciation or affection. Yukino didn't hold that against him. It was not like he needed to buy her pretty baubles and cute trinkets to keep her interested in him. But it was a thought which had slipped into her mind. And she had done him a favour by wearing an apron while she opened the main door to let him in to her apartment.
He had stared at her before she could call him out for staring too much. He never over did it. Took note of her appearance, her hair which was styled different, one red ribbon this time, twisted in a simple updo and, in what might be considered a playful ponytail which graced her back.
Maybe it was too much stimulation for a virgin like him.
If he pulled out a condom from his pockets, she was going to stab him.
"Where did I put that stuff?" He repeated.
Yukino saw him pat himself like he had lost something, which he most definitely had. He gave a few hurried taps to both the side pockets of his jeans trousers. It was strange. He could have just stuck in his hands and riffled through the contents. Then he touched the front pocket of his buttoned down shirt. Again, he didn't look inside. Then the back pocket of his trousers. He was literally giving himself a pat down after stepping into her apartment. He was such a strange boy. If anyone saw him, they you think he was dusting himself off from some kind of invisible soot that had covered his clothes after he was done cleaning chimneys.
"What are you looking for, Hikigaya-kun?" Yukino asked.
"It's a surprise. I thought, I would give it to you later." He said, without halting his search. Yukino wondered whether this was his way to show off his entire body to her and let her imagine how it would feel like when she is the one doing all the petting. Yukino shook her head to clear her thoughts. He was not a cat, Yukino, she scolded herself. He doesn't need to be pet like that.
"G-Give me what?" Yukino asked with a brief fumble.
"Well it's my first time in your apartment after we became a couple." Hachiman blushed. There was a look which passed his eyes that was too quick to catch. "And we are having dinner, so, I thought, about…" he trailed off. Then there was a look of surprise which flew over his face. "Ah, I found it!"
"Found what?" This time her voice was a bit terse.
"Hey, it's a surprise. You didn't think I would come empty handed did you?" Hachiman asked, flustered. He didn't take out the contents from his back pocket. Yukino told herself, she was looking at his backside to figure out, what he didn't take out. He didn't seem to notice her and went on with his explanation. "I might be okay with the idea of a free meal and the chance to have dinner with you in your apartment. But, that doesn't mean I am an ungrateful guest. I planned to bring something special for you tonight."
"You didn't have to bring me anything. But since I cooked the equivalent of a small buffet, I would appreciate it if you brought something fitting for this little occasion."
"This little occasion." He croaked, then looked shocked. "Wait, what do you mean a small buffet?"
"I wouldn't call it a buffet, per se." Yukino tried not to look too pleased. "But I have made enough…"
The word 'satisfy' or 'sate' could have been used in the phrase that had initially come to her mind. But then she put them together and couldn't help but blush before trailing off into silence. Her nee-san would tease her so much for having these kind of thoughts: Ne, Yukino-chan, you want to satisfy his hunger while you sate your own hunger, that's pretty erotic, you know. Onee-chan is proud of you!
No, Yukino was not ready to be that erotic. Plus, it was weird to have her older sister's voice sound in her head like that. It was his fault.
He was turning her into a wanton woman.
"Sorry, made enough, what?" Hachiman asked, puzzled.
It was somewhat his fault. Therefore, he should share half of the responsibility. But that was easier said than done. When phrases with certain sexual overtones, mix with words which are somewhat synonymous and might work well, but don't really sound right. Still, you throw them together and hope it will stick in the conversation.
And as a result. "….to kill your hunger."
"What do you mean?"
He was still not getting it. How could you be so dense, Hikigaya-kun, Yukino wanted to ask. But she didn't, because she knew, she was being purposefully obtuse to preserve her own slipping notions of innocence and questioning the need to preserve her own chastity. Still, did he want her to blurt it out so openly, without no shame at all. Really, he was expecting too much of her, without doing half of the work.
"I h-have made e-enough to kill your h-hunger!"
Yukino stammered through at first. But she finished strong. The word 'hunger' definitely sounded a little flirty and a bit seductive. This was fine. She was okay. But still, she was old fashioned and raised with a certain kind of upbringing. Even without such considerations, it was still an established fact, that it fell upon the man to woo the woman and seduce her in a courtship. This was the modern era, so a woman can be more upfront. But Yukino had been the one to confess. So, he should be the one to initiate the next step.
But there he was, looking at her like she was a serial killer with a knife.
Oh, wait a minute.
Ah, of course.
She had come to welcome him into her apartment while she was still cooking, thinking about surprising him by wearing an apron which she had read was every man's fantasy – to look at the woman he loved in an apron, a smile on her face, and a soup ladle in one hand.
Yukino had smile at him. But in her hand, instead of a harmless soup ladle, there had been something else. A large knife made of stainless steel which shined, ominously, even in the bright lights of her living room. He was being silly. Yukino, unconsciously, adjusted her grip on the blade which she had been using on the chicken, lest it slipped past her hand and lands on her foot. They might cut off her toes, cleanly.
"…I hope my hunger is the only thing you plan to kill, tonight, Yukinoshita." Hachiman stated, half-joking.
Yukino thought he could do better. This wasn't him taking the initiative. This was him being genuinely concerned about his own wellbeing. For a second there she almost thought, he would say something bold which might send her heart to a frenzy. Perhaps, it was too much to expect from him at such an early stage in their relationship. He was inexperienced and his communications skills left much to be desired. He certainly wouldn't know how to flirt with a woman. The best he could do was, repackage and twist a reply that was meant for him and make it sound a bit more obtuse with a small hint of sophistry.
But, since, her own flirtations were superior and she was more certain of her own feelings for him, than she expected he would ever realise, Yukino thought of leaving him with a parting mercy. But there was no need not to tease him about his lack of skills in the department. Surely, she was the more assertive one in the relationship, not that, that was ever in question.
"That depends on you, Hikigaya-kun." Yukino said, crossing her arms, chin raised, defiant. "I don't need to tell you that love has been the leading cause for murders in history throughout the ages."
A moment of silence was observed for the romantic mood which lay dead between them. Murdered like she said, due to her callous words to be clever with the thought to tease him and show him her womanly charm. But instead of coming off as a tantalisingly enchanting woman tempting his fate, Yukino had sounded more like a femme fatale from a classic noir movie, left with a broken heart and a smoking barrel.
"…You have been hanging around, Senjougahara, too much." Hachiman observed.
"Ah, sorry." Yukino blushed.
It was so much like her in its own twisted way. Blaming the past of others for her current inaction, then passing the buck to someone else. He had been half right without meaning to and that was what scared her the most sometimes.
He had the power to make her apologize now.
Nee-san didn't.
Nor did mother.
"Ah, it's okay." He said offhandedly. "Plus, if you kill me, I would probably deserve it."
Yukino stifled a giggle. This was better. He knew how to make her laugh. Dark humour, who would have thought. It was not really a bad joke, considering he was not exactly wrong. But of course she might not seriously consider killing him for breaking her heart in the near future. But she might consider putting something in his bento or slipping something into his bowl of miso soup.
A last supper. How fitting. But a bit of an over exaggeration. "I am glad we have reached an agreement on that end. If something happens to our relationship, it would undoubtedly be because of a lapse in your judgement."
Yukino realised later, as she had a couple of times before, that she was the one who discussed more actively about them as a couple. In some part of her mind, she couldn't help but wonder whether, she had a more emotional investment in their relationship.
Hachiman seemed fine, alone.
It was her, who wanted them to be together.
There was an imbalance and it could lead to heartbreak in the near future. Even now, the two of them had accidentally talked about breaking off their relationship in the future. Something which might happen to our relationship because of a lapse in his judgement, Yukino had said, in what she hoped was her usual haughty manner.
But what she wanted was to feel secure and safe in the knowledge that it was his choice to be with her, as much as it had been her choice to chose him. But, so far, he only seemed to acknowledge the fact, that he cannot see them together in the near future, that he was okay with the idea of him deserving her hate, her want to kill him, when he broke her heart.
This is not what she wanted to hear.
"But, at least, I hope, I won't die a virgin, Yukinoshita."
Yukino looked at him.
He looked at her. There was a faint shade of red on his cheeks, blooming like the fine chilli powder, sprinkled in a hot, spicy curry, which she had been sautéing in the kitchen, while thinking about him and dinner and what else to expect afterwards.
This had been one of those expectations. But, she had been certain that he would wait. This was his first time in her apartment, since they started seeing each other as more than club mates, but less than the usual love-sick teenagers who made out in public and held hands and were okay calling each other with sweet and cutesy nick names.
They were not at that level of intimacy.
Yukinoshita Yukino thought he had went with the idea of being in a relationship with her owing to her own unexpected and abrupt confession. He had accepted because he was dumbstruck or he lost his mental faculties owing to the fact that a beautiful woman like her, had actually come up to her and confessed to him – which was certainly something which he couldn't believe at that time.
But, Yukino liked him.
Hachiman – Yukino was almost certain – didn't like her as much.
Until now.
"Le- Let's have dinner first." Yukino blushed and stammered and powered through. "And, a-and, I will, think about your o-other r-request on a later date. But for tonight, dinner will have to suffice."
"I am fine with that."
There was no mistaking it. The half smile, the twinkled look. He had meant it that way. Who would have thought, the self professed, loner-kun, who didn't know how to talk to women, was actually somewhat adept at flirting.
Hikigaya Hachiman was also fine with the idea of waiting before taking her to bed. Well, that was expected. Yukinoshita Yukino wouldn't have picked some psycho pervert who didn't have control over his limbs and other appendages and might think that her choice to wait and prepare herself, both mentally and physically, made her a cold hearted woman and a bit of a prude.
Yukinoshita Yukino wasn't a prude. She just believed in the virtue of patience.
"That's good to know." Yukino said with a smile.
Then she remembered something of a little more importance. "Oh, by the way, we won't be having dinner all by ourselves, tonight."
He cocked his head to this side like a confused little cat, then asked the question, she would have expected from him at that point of time. But at least, he didn't sound as opposed to the idea as she had thought earlier. He almost sounded curious. Though it was hard to tell with the sharp intake of breath, the one sure sign of surprise, from he who mistakenly thought, that he was infallible.
"Excuse me?" Hachiman blurted.
Yukino smiled, sheepishly.
-/-/-/-
A/N: Okay, so, I know this is not the fic, that most of you thought I would update. But, I'm kinda liking the less tense atmosphere of this fic…for now. Also, the other characters from different series who act as a buffer, to make Yukino and Hachiman's relationship stick out, more prominently, is also why I like this fic.
For now, this dinner arc will have at least two more chapters. Whether it will have more, will depend on the characters. With that said, here are the options for the guests/characters who show up in the next chapter:
Option 1: Winry Rockbell x Edward Elric. (From Fullmetal Alchemist )(First Kiss)
Option 2: Haruno Yukinoshita. Hayama Hayato. (Surprise Guests)
Please pick one.
Hope everyone enjoyed reading this chapter.
Leave lots and lots of reviews, follow and fave.
Won't betray your dreams.
