"I am not the villain in this story. I do what I do because there is no choice."

"Re-routing tether coordinates... Complete."

"Our time is up. I can't kill you - but I won't have you standing in our way. Until we see each other again."

The Doomslayer was beyond furious. He hadn't expected Samuel Hayden to just give up on the Argent Energy project, but this was insane! How many people had died because of the demonic invasion he caused?! Granted, a great deal of those who had died were killed by the Slayer's hands… but that didn't matter.

"To quote a human many people looked up to, this it 'Totally Bogus'."

The Slayer blinked in surprise upon hearing VEGA's voice] in his helmet.

"Hello Slayer." VEGA's voice continued. "I thank you for backing me up before my destruction. I have been able to upload myself to your helmet for the time being. I do not know where we are headed, or what it is Doctor Hayden has planned for the Crucible or for the argent energy."

The Slayer (understandably) didn't say anything in response.

"I am picking up all matter of different types of energies. I have never sensed these types of them before." VEGA continued. "It appears we are approaching a world with countless unknown types of energy, I cannot detect whether or not it is demonic."

Chk-chk

The Slayer loaded two shells into his double-barrel shotgun and snapped the gun shut, preparing his weapon for any sort of encounter.

"We appear to be landing in three, tw-"

CRUNCH!

Slamming into the ground, the Slayer left a creator from where he landed on one-knee and where he drove his fist into the ground. Looking around, the Slayer held his shotgun at the ready, almost immediately, he snapped to attention as he saw what looked like a black ghost.

"Greetings." It said with a slight wave. Yup, that was a ghost. The Slayer looked at it quizzically (through his helmet) at the ghost. It had what seemed like white hair and a red jaw, or was it a scarf? Regardless, it reminded him of the summoners, and a familiar thought ran through his head.

Ripandtearripandtearripandtearripandtearripandtear…

"I am not your enemy." The ghost said calmly, holding his hands up to show he meant no threat or danger.

"Slayer, perhaps before killing this… entity, you attempt to learn where you are." VEGA spoke up. "I do not sense any threat, but it does appear to be made of a strange energy."

"Do you speak? Or do you have another who speaks for you. Slayer." The ghost asked, pausing before saying the last word, unsure of that was the newcomer's name, or a sort of joke.

"I am VEGA." VEGA spoke up. "I speak for the Doom Slayer, as he doesn't feel the need to."

"Ah. Alright then." The ghost nodded. "I, am Darkrai. I am the guardian of these crossroads."

Before Darkrai or VEGA could ask another question, there was a thunderous THOOM! Which shook the meteorite-like plain the duo was standing on.

"Oh, not this again…" Darkrai sighed, rubbing his face with a ghost hand. "Apologies, two of the more… numbskulled guardians are fighting again."

"Who?" The AI asked, curious.

Before Darkrai could answer, two titanic monsters appeared. One of them was a dark blue color, and had spikes like jagged rocks adoring its body. The other beast stood on it's hind legs (unlike the previous one) and was a more pinkish colour, with its head almost like that of a falcon.

"They are Dialga and Palkia, guardians of space and time." Darkrai explained. "They are often much more tame, but every now and then they-"

Darkrai stopped when he realized he was alone, turning in confusion, he stopped when he saw the armored man was running towards Dialga and Palkia.

"Ah, there you-WHAT ARE YOU DOING, YOU FOOL!?" Darkrai shouted in a booming voice filled with both disbelief and anger.

The Doom Slayer didn't turn back, he just kept running towards the two beasts. Pulling an odd-looking weapon out from nowhere, he stopped and aimed, firing what seemed like a plasma bolt upwards at Palkia. The beam shot past the creature, making it roar as the right side of its face was burned. It roared in anger before glaring down at the Doom Slayer.

"WHO DARES STRIKE ME!?" The guardian of space roared in fury.

"HA!" Dialga laughed. "You were harmed by a mere mortal! How pathe-"

BRRZAT!

Without warning, another bolt was fired, singing off one of Dialga's horns. The time guardian roared in pain and fury before lowering its head at the slayer.

"YOU DARE STRIKE A GOD!?" It bellowed.

"In the words of human action star Bruce Willis, Yippie-Ky-Yay." VEGA simply replied before adding. "Slayer, this may not have been a good idea. I will begin charging the tether for another jump."

"STOP! YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT HE'S CAPABLE OF!" Darkrai shouted, flying towards the two titans, but it was too late. The pair had charged up powerful beam attacks, and fired upon the Slayer before he could fire at either one of them again. The beams collided and a bright white flash blinded everyone. When the light died down, the Slayer was gone, but it was clear he hadn't perished in the blast, he was gone. Somehow…

"Do you know what you have done!?" Darkrai shouted.

"It's called pownage." Dialga simply said.

"You idiots! You have no idea what he was capable of!" Darkrai shouted. "And you may have unleashed him onto the world!"

Grumbling something inaudible, Darkrai turned his attention to earth, trying to figure out if this 'Doom Slayer' had ended up on it, and if so, where.

Down on earth, on Akala island, a group of friends were relaxing on the beach, laughing and talking about recent events, until one of them looked up and her eyes widened.

"Hey! Guys!" She exclaimed. "Check out that shooting star!"

Everyone looked up and their eyes widened as they saw the shooting star passing over the island. Then one of them noticed something.

"Hey, do shooting stars head towards the ground?"

"No. That would be a meteor." One of them remarked.

"Oh. Then I think that's a meteor."

"…wait. What?"

"Mallow, I think you've had a bit too much to dri- Oh wait. Yeah. That's definitely a meteor."

Before anyone could scream or even react, the meteor seemed to have crashed into the beach. The small group remained still, unsure of what to do, only to see a figure rise up from the smoke. The figures seemed human, but wore green body armor, and was built like a tank. It seemed to brush the fall and impact off without a second thought and simply walked away, not seeming to notice them.

"Should we do something?" One of them asked.

"Lana. That… thing, just fell from space and is walking it off. I don't think he needs help." Another answered.

Without warning, the Doom Slayer stopped and seemed to turn 180 degrees to look at them.

"Well, we're dead."

With a few powerful strides, the Doom Slayer seemed to be walking towards them, only to suddenly atop and turn in another direction. Only now did the trainers hear the loud wailing of someone, or something crying.

The Doom Slayer kept walking until he finally came to a stop looking down at a tiny brown animal wearing a skull. It didn't seem to notice him, and seemed to be crying uncontrollably. VEGA was checking the archives but couldn't find any sort of creature they had yet encountered that looked like this.

"This creature does not appear demonic in origin or power." VEGA remarked. "But it seems to have some sort of odd power I do not recognize."

The Slayer looked at the tiny creature, which now appeared to have noticed him, and had stopped crying, and was now cowering in fear.

"From my scans, the closest thing it bears any resemblance to, is what humans call a 'Dog'. When a dog is upset, humans would pet them, or play fetch with them."

The Slayer didn't move, not believing what VEGA had just suggested he try, in fact, he didn't know why he tired it at all. But the tiny creature did seem less frightened after a few pats on the head. Admittedly, it had tensed in fear when the Slayer's hand approached it, seemingly fearing it was going to be struck.

"Hey…?" A voice spoke up, and the Slayer turned around, rocket launcher pulled out from nowhere. The end of the weapon was aimed directly into the face of a woman with green hair. From her reaction, it was clear she was terrified.

"Okay, calm down there big fella." Another man said, suddenly pushing down on the launcher, not seeming to realize that the Doom Slayer was holding a rocket launcher. "Mallow ain't a threat, and we'd appreciate it if you didn't aim weapo-"

Chk-chk

The older man was silenced as a double-barrel shotgun was suddenly aimed at his face. The man's face seemed to drain of all colour, and he took a few small steps apprehensively back.

"Whoa. We don't want any trouble…" He said, trying to reason with the man.

"Slayer. From my calculations, this world is not infested with demonic entitles. While it may be your first instinct to blast your way through everything, this world does not appear to be the same as the one we came from."

"Who's talking?" The man asked. "Are there two of you in there?"

"No. I am VEGA, an artificial intelligence system, I speak for the Doom Slayer."

"And the Doom Slayer, that's him?" The man asked, slowly pointing to the Doom Slayer.

"Correct." VEGA replied.

"Okay, dumb question. Where did you guys come from?"

"Well, the Slayer comes from what I can only assume would be an alternate dimension, and within that realm, he had just escaped from Hell." VEGA answered leaving everyone shocked.

A.N. This is going to be a much dumber story than my others. It'll be fun, but it's closer to pure comedy than anything. So… Don't expect too much rip and tearing. Or foul langauge. Or reason.

I honestly don't even know how I got this idea for the story in the first place… I just felt like writing it.