132New story! Yay?
1
First Impressions
I chuckled as I scrolled through yet another dank meme on Reddit. "On my life, Reddit is one the best things invented by man," I said to myself. There was no one else in the house so I liked to talk to myself. I scrolled more, coming across a post in the r/NarutoFanfiction subreddit. Story Ideas Thread was the title. I was curious, so I decided to check it out. As I scrolled through the comments, a smile bloomed on my face at some of the ideas. "Interesting," I said as I saw some interesting ones. "Cool," I said as I saw some cool ones. "What the fuck?" I said as I saw some absolutely shit ones.
Finally, my eyes fell upon one: You, the person reading this, wake up to find yourself in the Naruto world as Sasuke the day after the Academy Final Exams. It was made by someone called Raesong. Interesting name. I rubbed my chin as I thought about what I would do if some shit like this actually happened.
The main reason I got interested was that out of all the characters in the Narutoverse, Sasuke is my most hated one. I seriously hate everything about him. The way he refuses to accept help. The way he betrays his own people for 'power'. Fuck that guy.
"Self-centered arrogant little fuckhead," I mutter to myself as his image popped into my mind when I closed my eyes.
"What was that, teme!?" I heard a shout from beside me.
WHAT THE FUCK!? I mentally screamed as my whole body tightened, ready to lash out to anyone nearby. I was alone in my house so there shouldn't…
This wasn't my house…
I looked around more until I looked to the right and saw two striking cerulean orbs boring into my eyes. Not only that, but the face had three whiskers marks on each cheek. This… OH SHIT THIS WAS NARUTO!
I looked around more and saw all kinds of different people staring at me. There was Sakura and Ino, Shikamaru and Chouji, Hinata, Shino, Kiba, and I guess the rest of the characters were just fodder. I didn't see Sasuke though…
Wait…
No fucking way…
I looked at the window to the left of me and saw Sasuke's reflection staring back at me.
"No fucking way…" I mutter at the realization sank in.
"What happened, Sasuke-kun?" A girl's voice – probably Sakura – called out to me.
SHIT! I really was Sasuke! And judging by how Naruto jumped onto the desk in front of me, I'd say this was right after the Academy final exams. The team assignment day. Anything else important I'm missing? It hit me as I saw Naruto lose his balance and come falling towards me. Oh right, how could I forget? I put my hands up just in time to hold his shoulders… but FUCK the guy was heavy. I mean it's not all that surprising seeing how much ramen he eats.
Naruto lips fell on mine since I couldn't move my head away in time. We both separated instantly and started gagging. No homo, but his lips were pretty soft, styll.
"Dude, what the fuck!?" I said more irritated than angry.
"Ew, I'm going to get Uchiha germs!" Naruto cried as he was chased by some girls.
That hit hard. I mean… I know I'm not really Sasuke, but I have gotten bullied like that in the past and it does hurt, y'know. Ah, whatever. I balled up those little memories and shoved them way deep into my heart.
The door slid open as the man, the myth, the legend, Iruka-sensei himself strode in. He cleared his throat and used his infamous 'Big-Head Jutsu'. "QUIET!" he roared as all the children… As all the child soldiers scrambled to get to their seats.
Frankly, I didn't pay attention to that long ass speech about being a shinobi and everything. It was whatever, y'know. Rather than that, I planned what I was going to do next. There's no way, right? I mean I probably ate something, and this is all just a hallucination… right? RIGHT!? Oh god, this shit is real. Okay, okay, calm down. If this isn't real, that means I'm in some kind of a dream or coma in real life. If that's what happened, then I've got nothing to worry about. I'll be taken to the hospital, and Canada has free healthcare so… YEET!
On the other hand, if this is real… well… let's start planning, I guess. This world was so different than Earth. Speaking of, I wonder what happened to my real body. If I'm dead in that world, then please, to whatever godlike entity that transported me here, please, please wipe my laptop's hard drive… And my phone… And my google drive… And my OneDrive- Basically just please wipe everything I own. Please and thank you.
Now, moving onto the next problem, what to do here? Yes, I hate Sasuke, but this is an amazing chance to change his (mine?) character. And I know some amazing secrets. Hell, I could even make Naruto completely loyal to me by telling him that I accept him and by telling him about his family. And Itachi…
I clenched my eyes as I felt a sharp headache as soon as I thought of him. Hah… I guess the original body's impulses stayed. Hopefully, I'll grow out of them. Itachi is an amazing guy, if not a bit stupid. I'll have to forgive him.
As that train of thought finished, Iruka was just moving onto the team assignments. "Team seven: Naruto Uzumaki," Naruto smiled as he looked forward eagerly. "Sakura Haruno."
Sakura's head thumped on the desk with a sad "Noooo."
Naruto jumped with glee with a happy "Yesss!"
"And Sasuke Uchiha," Iruka finished. Naruto and Sakura's reactions were reversed.
"Iruka-sensei!" Naruto exclaimed. "Why I someone as great as me have to be put with someone like him!?" he asked angrily with a finger pointed at me.
Before Iruka could say anything, I spoke. "Naruto," I called out.
"Huh?"
"I look forward to working with you," I said with a genuine smile on my face.
"HAH!?" Naruto exclaimed. "Is that a challenge!?"
… This guy's a fucking idiot.
The rest of the team assignments passed smoothly and finally, the time for waiting came. I knew that lowkey we were being watched by Kakashi. Kakashi, huh… To be honest, he's an amazing guy, but I've always disliked his teaching style and the way he neglects his students. Oh well, I guess that's just something I'll have to deal with. I'll just try to learn this shit early. That being said, I'll have to figure out this 'chakra' shit quickly.
"Yo," I called out to Naruto and Sakura who were the only ones in the room other than me. Both their heads turned towards me. Sakura's with stars in her eyes, and Naruto's with narrowed eyes. I kept an impassive expression on my face. "Listen up. We're a team now. Get that?" I asked.
"Yeah, so?" Naruto asked defiantly. Before Sakura could speak up and berate him, I quickly answered.
"So, that means that I'll be trusting you to watch my back on missions. We each need to know each others' strengths and weaknesses. Each of us needs to cover for each other. As a show of trust, I'll begin. I'm good at taijutsu, bukijutsu, and ninjutsu. Once I awaken my Sharingan, I'll get better at genjutsu also. I weakness is that I don't have enough stamina. That is something I have to improve. Next, Naruto."
Naruto and Sakura looked at me with wide eyes. "Uh… I…" Naruto began but wasn't sure what to say. I decided to help him out.
"Naruto. What are you good at?"
"Uh… pranks?"
"How are you going to use that in the shinobi world?"
"Uhm…" he thought hard as he scratched his head.
"Traps?" Sakura spoke up.
I pointed at her and she jumped. "Exactly. You can make complicated traps and be our traps specialist. What else are you good at?"
"I… have a lot of stamina. And even when I get tired, I can easily come back with only a little bit of rest," Naruto spoke proudly.
"Good. What else?" I asked.
"I think that's it," he said a bit sadly.
"That's not it," I said with a strong tone of voice. "Think. Why can't you make a proper Bunshin?"
"Because he doesn't have enough chakra," Sakura said.
"No. The exact opposite, in fact," I said with a smirk. The one thing I found cool about Sasuke was his face. "He has a fuckton of chakra. Almost as much, if not even more than the Hokage himself."
"R-Really?" Naruto asked hopefully.
"That's right. Now, this brings us to your weaknesses. The amount of chakra you have is inversely proportional to the amount to control you have over it, unless you have the experience," I explained.
Naruto looked at me with a most confused look ever and Sakura looked like she understood a little bit. I sighed and got up and walked over to the chalkboard. I picked up the chalk and started drawing a graph. "Now, here, on the x-axis, we have 'Amount of Chakra' and on the y-axis, we have 'Control Difficulty', understand?" I got nods from both of them. "Now, the more chakra you have," I said as I drew a line, "the more difficulty you have with controlling it. Got it?"
"So… I can't control it as well as Sakura-chan because I have too much chakra?" Naruto asked.
"Exactly."
"So…" Sakura began. "Does that mean I have less chakra?"
"Yep."
"Then what about you?" Naruto asked.
"I don't have as much as you, but I still have more than any chunin or mid-level jonin in our village… probably. Mainly because I come from a shinobi family," I explained. "So, Naruto. Your weaknesses are that you're a bit slow, your taijutsu absolute shit, and your chakra control is jacked which means that even ninjutsu is a bit tough for you unless you overload it with chakra in which case you would succumb to chakra exhaustion faster. Oh, and you can give up on even thinking about genjutsu… of course, unless you work non-stop on your control and make it as perfect as Sakura's." I decided to stop there as I saw smoke slowly rising from his head.
"Now, onto you Sakura. Strengths?" I asked.
"Uhm… I'm smart and I have good chakra control," Sakura said shyly as she squirmed under my gaze.
"Good. Weaknesses?"
"Well- "
"Everything else," I interrupted. She looked at me in shock. "I'm not going to mince my words, Sakura. At this point, the only thing you have going for you is your book smarts. Oh, and one more thing, if you want to become a functioning member of this team, you're going to have to stop dieting. Naruto and I can pull our own weights somehow but you… you have great potential but at this point… You're nothing but dead weight," I finished ruthlessly. A small smile showed on my face for just a second which went unnoticed by both of them. Naruto looked down with a contemplative face, no doubt thinking about his own shortcomings while Sakura almost had tears in her eyes.
"BUT!" I clapped my hands loudly which made both of them jump. "That just means we have to get better, right? We are a team. We help each other, we rely on each other, and we leave no one behind," I spoke with a strong tone and looked both of them in the eye with a cold hard piercing look.
"Right," Naruto said warily. "Hey, teme?"
My eye twitched. "What?"
"What happened to you?"
"Huh?"
"I mean…" Naruto looked at me suspiciously. "Why are you helping and being nice now? You weren't like this before."
"Life happened, Naruto," I said without missing a beat. Hopefully, this would be a good enough excuse.
"Life?" Sakura asked.
"We're shinobi now."
"Yeah, so?" Naruto said defiantly once more.
"Naruto," I said slowly, making my voice and body language much darker. "We're shinobi. Killers, liars, thieves, spies. In the real world out there, it's either kill or be killed." I finished and looked at them. Naruto had with eyes while Sakura was trembling in her seat. "Now, as I said, we are a team. Right?"
Sakura hesitated for a bit as she looked at Naruto and then at me. A few seconds of contemplation later, she also steeled her resolve and nodded. "Right."
"Good. Now, how about we prank our team leader for being late?" I said, looking at Naruto to which he immediately jumped and go to work.
...
Kakashi's head popped in and the eraser fell on his head. "I can't believe it," I muttered. Naruto or Sakura couldn't hear me but Kakashi used to be an ANBU captain. I'm sure his hearing was way above normal. "His hair really does stand up."
"My first impression of you three: I hate you. Meet me on the rooftop in five minutes," He said and disappeared.
Naruto and Sakura scrambled out the door as to not be late while I took my time walking. What's the worst that could happen? Ah shit, I jinxed it. I finally got up the stairs and opened up the door, to be met with three pairs of eyes. No, wait, two pairs and one lone eye.
"Glad you could finally make it," Kakashi said with a sarcastic smile.
"Yeah, my bad," I said with a dismissive wave and went to sit between Naruto and Sakura. "I had to help an old granny with her groceries." Kakashi's eye narrowed just a bit for a fraction of a second.
"I see… well, time for introductions. Names, likes, dislikes, plans for the future," Kakashi said cheerfully.
"Sensei, could you please start?" Sakura asked.
"Sure. My name is Kakashi Hatake. I have some likes and dislikes. I don't really have plans for the future," he finished with his trademark eye smile. "Now you," he pointed at Sakura.
"My name is Sakura Haruno. I like…" she looked at me. "My plans for the future…" she looked at me again and squealed.
"Dislikes?" asked Kakashi.
"Naruto!" she said, glaring at him.
"Okay, next," he pointed at me.
"My name is Sasuke Uchiha. My likes are…" computers, but I can't say that. What could I possibly say? Hmm… "Training, and sex," oh the looks on their faces was priceless. Even Kakashi's eye went wide open for a nanosecond. "I don't really have any dislikes. If I had to say, I guess people who are mean or rude for no reason?" Ah, there was the Canadian part of me. "Oh, and I hate being a burden on others. My plans for the future…" I smiled and slung my arms around each of my teammates. "Helping Naruto become Hokage, and helping Sakura become the strongest kunoichi in the world." I finished with a happy smile.
No doubt, this was extremely out of character for Sasuke. I loved the dumbstruck looks on all their faces.
"O… kay, next," Kakashi said and I let go of Naruto and Sakura.
"My name is Naruto Uzumaki. I like ramen! I dislike the two minutes it takes to cook the ramen. My plan is to become the greatest Hokage ever!"
"Ah that's nice," Kakashi said but then his expression turned serious. "But just one thing. You guys aren't a team yet." Oh yeah, the test. "You still have to pass the genin test."
How funny would it be if I were to mess all this shit up? LOL
"Oh yeah," I said with a thoughtful look on my face. "The second test where they decide if we'll actually be a genin or not, right? I heard that the academy test was just to see if you have the potential but this one is the real one and always has some meaning behind. Oh, and apparently the failure rate is like 66 percent or some shit."
Naruto and Sakura looked at me as if I had grown another head. Kakashi's look was totally undecipherable though. I guess he wasn't an ANBU captain for nothing.
"Yes, Sasuke, that's right. 6 o'clock tomorrow morning at training ground 7. Don't be late this time," he said with a slight touch of killing intent, which, to be honest, I only felt because it got easier to breathe a little bit. The air here was too light. The air on Earth was filled with subconscious killing intent. Even a five-year-old subconscious let out enough on the level of an experienced jonin. At least, that was my conjecture. "Oh," Kakashi added as an afterthought. "I suggest you don't eat breakfast. You'll puke." He vanished in a whirl of leaves, leaving us to our own devices. No doubt, he was still watching us.
"Sasuke-kun, do you want to go on a date?" Sakura asked as she turned towards me. Hmm… I've always liked Sakura's character. This might be a good way to get in her pants, but she was way too young at the moment. Maybe in a few years.
"Sakura," I said coldly. "I said one of my dislikes was being a burden on others, remember?" I asked her and made sure that Naruto was listening to us too. Sakura nodded confusedly. "I truly meant that. If I was ever a burden on anyone, I'd rather kill myself." Sakura and Naruto's eyes widened. "And the same applies the other way around. People who are a burden on others and don't do anything about it are the worst and should go die. You, Sakura, at the moment, are the weakest link in this team. I don't hate you, but if you continue to stay like this, I will. You know what you have to work on. Get better, get stronger, and I'll love you with all my heart." I stopped to let the words sink into both of them. "Do you both understand?" I asked and got nods from both of them.
"Do… you guys want to hang out… or something?" Naruto asked hopefully.
"Of course," I turned to him with a smile. "How about Ichiraku Ramen?"
"YES! Let's go!" he said with a cheer and started to walk.
I quickly interrupted. "Ah, sadly, I don't have enough money, so I guess today won't be possible."
"Don't worry! I'll pay for you this time!" Naruto said with a happy smile.
"Real shit? Alright, thanks a lot, man!" I said with enthusiasm. Yes! I don't have to pay this time.
As we walked, Naruto rambled about unimportant. We neared the famous ramen place as I quickly spoke up. "Okay listen up." Both Naruto and Sakura looked at me at once. "Don't ask how I know all this. Just keep listening and trust me, understood?" I got a pair of nods. "Our sensei's name is Kakashi Hatake. He used to be an ANBU captain. He's the son of 'Konoha's White Fang', Sakumo Hatake, and is one of, if not the most powerful ninja in the village, save for the Hokage himself. In fact, I believe he is next in line for the position in case of the Sandaime's early death."
"Wow… he's really that powerful?" Naruto asked with wide eyes.
"Yup," I said, making a popping sound with my lips.
"I guess that's good," Sakura said. "We are going to have an amazing sensei."
"Actually, this is very bad."
"What!? Why!?" Naruto said loudly as we got to the ramen stand. We all greeted the staff and sat down.
"Because every powerful ninja has a quirk and our sensei's quirk," damn that was weird to say, "is that he is… very, very lazy when he has to do anything that's not an emergency."
"What? How?" It was Sakura who asked this time.
"He's perpetually late to anything and everything. At least 3 hours." Two jaws hit the ground. "He doesn't teach anything unless we have flawless teamwork. The flaw in that is that it's practically impossible for new genin to have such teamwork. In short, we got the shittiest teacher ever."
Both my teammates looked down despondently.
"But," I said as they looked at me with considerably less enthusiasm. "That just means that we have to take care of ourselves. We're a team, remember?" I said with a small smile.
Naruto grinned wide and said, "Hell yeah! We'll be the strongest team in the world!"
Sakura looked nervous for a second before she also nodded seriously.
"That's what I like to hear," I said.
Huh… maybe the Narutoverse won't be too bad.
Idk how long this one will be. Hope you enjoyed it tho.
Leave a review, please? That's what I live off of.
