57A/N: COLU WEEK IS HERE
JK IT'S APPROACHING AND I'VE BEEN HORRIBLY INFLUENCED BY ALL THE SPORTS ROMANCE NOVELS I'VE BEEN READING RECENTLY SO PLEASE ENJOY THIS ABSOLUTE SHITFEST
This is the prologue.
There are three universal truths about black letter law classes: everybody hates them, they give you PTSD the likes of which the LSAT only dreams of inducing, and from the second Lucy Heartfilia sat down, bright eyed and bushy tailed, in first year torts, she knew she'd found her niche.
Of course, astute lawyer that she is, Lucy's also painfully aware that for every established truth, there is always some kind of clause in the (criminally tiny, 0.5 point font) fine print that'll come and fuck her over if she doesn't put on her thick glasses and crack out the magnifying glass Mest got her as a joke a couple years back. In this case, the clause goes something like this: you may find you like black letter law classes, and you may find you're good at them; if the above two are true, the job you wind up getting after articling is gonna eat you alive.
This is not one of those clauses contracts prepared her for.
"Mest, darling," Lucy begins evenly, "Please tell me your firm is still hiring."
"You hated crim pro in law school, schnookums," Mest reminds her. She can hear the steady hum of keyboards and hushed conversation on his end; actual, functional, legal work going on. Bastard.
"I might need you to be my counsel in a few weeks then."
"You're dealing with contracts and shit for soccer players, Lucy, it can't be that bad."
She hazards another glance down at the 3" binder on her lap (no, contracts and crim pro did not prepare her for this, where are her manila envelopes?) and flips past the pages upon pages of legal jargon back to the picture clipped to the front. He's handsome, all right, with an arrogant tilt to his mouth that's sent all his prior legal reps running for the hills.
"Who is it you're the rep for, again? Don't tell me it's Black Steel."
"Nope. Erik-"
"Cobra? They stuck you with Cobra?! You're fucked! Fucked! We used to use him for case studies in entertainment law, remember?"
Oh.
That's why his name looked so familiar when she saw his file.
This is the same rat bastard whose hypothetical on the 60% final tanked her grade so hard she had to appeal it to the dean?
Not this time, Cobra. Not this fuckin' time.
(Section 1 of the Employment Contract: at no point in time may legal counsel attempt to injure, kill, or otherwise maim Erik Adriá Vivas ("the Client"). This includes, but is not limited to, attempting to concuss him with the goalposts, strangling him with his shoelaces, and waterboarding him in the locker room.)
A/N: I'm crying softly this is gonna be so funny.
Mildly inspired by Kulti and The Hating Game.
Review please!
-Eien
