17Finally got around to adding another chapter to this collection! I just... was kinda miffed after seeing the episode 13 of s4 so I whipped up a little something for my girls.
Disclaimer: I do not own Boku no Hero Academia.
Chapter 5.
It was needless to say that everyone was waiting in anxious anticipation for the heroes to return from the Hassaikai hideout with Eri, though some people showed their relief at everyone's return more than others.
There was grief about the grave injuries, and particularly about the loss of Mirio's quirk.
But the fact that everyone had miraculously returned alive - and with Eri - outweighed the laments.
The raid on the hideout had only taken a single day, and yet to everyone involved, it had felt like weeks upon weeks.
When Ochako and Tsuyu finally are able to return to the dorms, they're swamped instantly by the other girls. Mina and Momo throw their arms around them, nearly in tears about how worried they'd been, and how proud they are.
And though the pair of returning heroes smiles and thanks them all for their off-site spiritual support, neither of them seem to be quite like themselves.
It isn't long before everyone else in the dorms heads to the infirmary to see the boys, teachers, and to hear about Eri.
Before they know it, Ochako and Tsuyu find themselves alone in the dorms. Their own prior visit to the hospital had allowed them the opportunity to shower and change into more casual clothes after their checkups, so now they stood in tank-tops, t-shirts, and shorts together, watching as the others leave the building. Silence leaks in all around them, and it isn't long before Ochako feels the need to say something.
"Gosh, what a mission. I can't believe we're already back. The raid only took a single day…"
Tsuyu nods.
"That's how it often is in this line of work. You spend so much time researching a villain or crook, planning out your moves and strategizing, but then the actual event is over in a few hours or even minutes. It can be a little weird sometimes."
"Yeah…" To be honest, Ochako hadn't really cared much for the topic. She'd only said something to fill the silence. Tsuyu seems to understand and almost feels guilty for having given such an extended explanation for a comment that didn't need to be expanded upon in the first place. She shakes her head, not willing to welcome any more negative thoughts, and changes the subject.
"Do you want anything to eat, Ochako-chan?"
Ochako gives her a forced little smile.
"Nah, I'm good. I ate at the hospital. What about you?"
"I'm fine."
Silence.
It's the strangest atmosphere, coming home after such an intense battle. The dorm is still the same, as are all of their colleagues who had stayed behind.
But the two of them had seen such horrible things, such gruesome injuries inflicted on people close to them, such awful tactics from the worst of the worst villains. It was on a whole other level from just the usual crooks and offenders in town. It was humbling in a way - scary.
But it also kindled a flame inside their hearts, to propel them forward and to continue their training so they could prevent things like this from ever happening again.
But even so, the air is still weighted between them, heavy with feelings they can't find the words or chance to explain.
After a moment, Ochako begins twiddling her fingers and kicking her foot a bit nervously.
Tsuyu could already tell she was feeling upset, and being unable to think of what the right thing to say could be right now, she goes with logic.
"The nurses said we should get some rest," she reminds her.
Ochako's fingers curl up into fists as she grips the end of her shirt.
"Rest from what? We didn't even do anything…"
"Gero?" Tsuyu tilts her head to one side and puts a finger to her chin curiously. She's never heard Ochako sound like that before. She hears a sniffle from her friend.
And then suddenly Ochako whirls around to face her. Her cheeks are red and her eyes are filled with tears.
"I mean it, Tsuyu-chan!" she cries "We didn't do anything at that raid! All we did was get the energy drained out of us before the battle even started! We couldn't do any-"
Suddenly, the room blurs around her, and a familiar feeling of nausea crashes into her like an oncoming train. It sends a horrible ache into the back of her skull and brings her to her knees.
"Ochako-chan!" Tsuyu dives forward to catch her, holding her up as best she can before lowering her down more slowly to the floor. She's a bit startled by Ochako's sudden anger, and also still relatively dizzy from it all, so Tsuyu soon finds she can't muster the strength to get back up right away. She slumps to the floor with her friend, who is now sniffling in vain to keep the tears back. Ochako clings to her tightly to prevent herself from swaying.
"Damn it…" She chokes on another sob, bowing her head. "Even after it's over, it's still affecting us…?"
"Ochako-chan, it's all right." Tsuyu has to admit she's even more taken aback now after hearing Ochako curse like that. She can tell her friend's frustrations are stemming from something deep and hurtful. "The nurses and Ryukyu-sensei all told us the effects of that guy's quirk would still linger even after a few days. The only way to get better sooner is to rest and eat properly."
"How can I?!" Ochako blurts, and her grip on Tsuyu's arms becomes tighter. "How am I supposed to sleep knowing I didn't do anything to help Deku-kun and the others?"
Tsuyu has seen this kind of reaction from many people before; this frustration that consumes better judgement, an anger so deep-rooted in self-guilt that simple logic won't be able to combat it.
But she's never seen it from Ochako before, and logic is what Tsuyu is best at.
It hurts. Because she wants to make Ochako feel better, but she doesn't harbor the emotional skills to handle this on her own. Tsuyu is best at support in battle, not in feelings.
Ochako is the one person she'd never want to see in pain, be it physically or otherwise. And it makes her heart hurt that she doesn't know what to do for her now. She can only try her best with what she has.
"Don't say that, Ochako-chan. We handled that big guy with Ryukyu-sensei and Nejire-chan, and we provided backup for Midoriya-kun and the others."
"But that's all!" Ochako wails. "We didn't even get to fight! We got taken out before we could even do anything! We were useless…"
"Gero…" Had it been anyone else, Tsuyu would have charged onward with her onslaught of logic. But when it's Ochako, she's scared of saying the wrong thing, of sounding too emotionally-detached by only giving facts when what her friend needs right now is emotion and understanding. But logic all Tsuyu knows, so she timidly continues.
"I don't think that's true… If it weren't for us, that big guy would've been another obstacle in everyone else's way. There would have been more injuries on our side. Maybe we never would've gotten to Eri-chan…"
Ochako's grip on her arms is starting to hurt, but Tsuyu's heart is in much greater pain. Her friend continues to cry, shaking her head as if trying to dislodge the nasty feelings.
"It's just… so frustrating…" she whimpers. "All that time training… and for what…?"
Tsuyu is at her limit. She doesn't know what to do. As expected, she hasn't been able to stop Ochako's tears by giving her the facts. She doesn't know if she should hug her now or keep her distance. She doesn't know if she should keep talking or be quiet.
So she just stops trying to think everything through first, and for once she lets her body do what comes naturally.
Her hands which have been holding Ochako up all this time, tentatively try to bring her in closer. But another feeling she doesn't like spreads through her chest. It's like a wave of bile or slime has splashed across her heart.
"I'm… not sure… gero-" Tsuyu stops her attempt at a hug before it really even begins. She bows her head as a harsh stinging feeling fills in behind her eyes. "I'm not sure… how or what we're supposed to be feeling... sorry… I'm sorry, Ochako-chan…"
And now that the disgruntled burning in her stomach has begun to dwindle, Ochako's senses come back to her very slowly. The rage fades, and she's glad for it. It hadn't felt like her.
And only then does she realize how childishly selfish she'd been all this time. She looks up sharply, as though woken from a trance.
"Tsuyu-chan-" She gasps, and a pang shoots through her heart like an arrow.
Tsuyu - who has been doing her best to comfort Ochako all this time - had finally reached her breaking point. Tears are dripping down her cheeks now, her shoulders and chest jolting with tiny hiccups and ribbits in between.
Ochako instantly forgets about all of her own self-pity. She'd seen Tsuyu cry once before, and that had been more than enough to make her decide she'd never wanted to let it happen again.
"Tsuyu-chan- Ah-!" Only now does she realize she'd been clinging to her so tightly that her hands have left red marks behind on her friend's forearms. Ochako instantly loosens her hold and instead slips her hands down to support her shaking arms from beneath. "I-I'm sorry! Did I hurt you-?"
Tsuyu closes her eyes and hiccups again, but it isn't a clear answer. Ochako wants to cry all over again, but for entirely different reasons this time.
"Tsuyu-chan… I'm sorry!" She throws her arms around her and pulls Tsuyu as close to her as possible. She's shaking so much from her tears that it feels like she's going to slip right out of her arms. Ochako hugs her as tightly as she dares. Not even that villain's quirk had drained her half as quickly as seeing Tsuyu cry does.
Ochako runs her hands up and down over her friends back as she continues to cry. She'd learned before that Tsuyu doesn't cry like most people. It's all hiccups and ribbits and little jolts that just make it seem all the more painful. It's so much that she can barely speak or even move through it all.
Tsuyu is one of those people who reacts with everything else first, and tears only as a last and final resort, once all of her other lines of defense have been completely broken down. And as such, once she's reached this point, it's very very difficult for her to stop.
Ochako hugs her without letting go, and every little whimpered "gero-" and jolt of Tsuyu's body makes Ochako feel all the more powerless.
"I'm sorry…" she murmurs again. "I didn't mean to yell at you, Tsu-chan… I didn't mean to curse… I didn't mean to sound so horrible… I'm so sorry…"
All Tsuyu has ever done for her, or for any of their other friends, is try to help. To provide support. That has always been her strongest skill in a plethora of already very strong skills. Tsuyu is their rock, their stability, their grounding force that keeps them all coming back to earth.
And especially for Ochako. Tsuyu is her gravity when she feels like she might float away, in any sense of the phrase.
And Ochako understands now that she'd strayed too far this time. She'd almost let her anger take her to the point of no return. Nothing was ever worth seeing Tsuyu cry, especially not anything as petty as that.
Presently, Tsuyu is still trapped in her state of being unable to speak due to all the hiccups. So Ochako does her best with words of comfort.
"You're right, Tsu-chan. Just like always, you're right. We did play a part in that fight. A part that, maybe, no one else would have been able to play if we hadn't been there. It might not have felt like a big part, but… it really might have been, if we think about it like you said."
Tsuyu hiccups against her shoulder, trying to speak now.
"Gero… I felt the same way, Ochako-chan… I felt like… like I wanted to do more… it was frustrating…"
"But you didn't let it get to you!" Ochako says proudly. "That's one of the things that makes you so amazing, Tsuyu-chan. You don't dwell on that kinda stuff. The 'what if' stuff or the 'I should've done more' stuff. You just focus on the reality, on what you did do, and you let that be enough. So you don't get dragged down by so many regrets and things." Ochako squeezes her a little tighter. "You really are the strongest one of all of us, Tsuyu-chan. You're amazing."
"Gero-" She hiccups again, clutching shakily at Ochako's sides. "I didn't know… what I could say to help you feel better… I didn't wanna make you more upset… I'm not good with these kind of things…"
"It's okay!" Ochako eases her friend back to get a good look at her. Tsuyu's eyes are still watery and overflowing, but Ochako wants her to see how earnest she is with what she's saying. "You're always so sensible, even when everyone else has their head in the clouds or in the sand, or is so focused on one thing or emotion that they let it consume them. I really mean it when I say that I don't think half of us in Class A would be where we are now if it weren't for you, Tsuyu-chan!"
"Gero…"
Ochako hugs her again.
"Thank you, Tsuyu-chan. We really don't tell you enough, but you're the best support we've got. And it's especially true for me. I don't know where I'd be without you… Probably all the way up in outer-space by now!" She's never been too confident in her speech either, so she tries to end it with a light-hearted joke.
And even though she can tell Tsuyu really isn't able to smile right now, she still tries to anyway.
Ochako pulls her in again and holds her for a long time. She's beginning to understand that the amount of time Tsuyu cries for coincides with not only how upset she is with the matter at-hand, but also with all of the other times she'd probably wanted to cry but hadn't let herself.
And in spite of her neutral, and almost stoic personality, Tsuyu probably feels things more deeply than any of the rest of them. She's just better at keeping it under control - until that first tear falls, and then the floodgates burst.
Eventually, as Tsuyu's sobs and hiccups begin to ease away, Ochako pats and rubs her back for her.
"You were right as always, Tsuyu-chan. I don't know why I got so upset. We saved Eri-chan in the end. We succeeded in our mission. I'm sorry I reacted like that. I think I'm just still so tired. I wish I could've done more, but… what I did do was enough."
At last, Tsuyu has gotten ahold of herself. She sits up as much as she can without letting go of her friend, sniffling a few more times.
"Gero. But I do understand why you were so upset. It did seem a little unfair that we got hit before we could really even begin… But such frustrations are a part of what it means to be a hero. A lot of things are unforeseeable, and a lot of things can't be helped sometimes. We're going to have to face a lot more frustrating things from here on out, I'm sure. But we can't let it get to us. If we do, then the villains have won."
Ochako finally manages a smile, a real one.
"Yeah. And we can't let that happen. Even a small to play part is still a part."
"Gero. And who knows? That may have actually been the biggest part of all."
"It could've been!" Ochako grins a little wider.
For a moment now, they wipe their faces and fix themselves up as best they can. Ochako can't help but glance guiltily down at the red spots on Tsuyu's arms. Tsuyu must notice and reassures her.
"It's all right. It doesn't hurt."
"But I did that to you… All because I couldn't control my emotions."
"Gero. It's all right."
"No, it's not. I'm sorry." Ochako reaches out to gently take both of her hands. She leans down and kisses each of Tsuyu's forearms in apology.
Tsuyu tilts her head. Logic would tell her that kissing an injury won't actually heal it. But she can't deny that she feels a whole lot better now.
"Now then," Ochako says as she sits up straight again. "Like you said, we should rest. We can't let this energy-draining stuff affect our training."
"Right."
"Can you stand?"
"Gero."
They keep ahold of one another and steadily get to their feet. It's true that even standing up too quickly will cause another dizzy spell, so they support each other mindfully. This time it's Tsuyu who sways, and Ochako quickly hooks an arm around her shoulders.
"Y'know, our rooms are pretty far," she says. "And the others will probably be a while at the hospital. So why don't we just nap here?"
Tsuyu smiles, and her tongue sticks out just a little.
"That sounds fine to me."
So they make their way over to the couch, where it is very quickly made clear to them that they'll be squished for space if they lie side by side. But Ochako doesn't want to split up. So she sits down with Tsuyu, then pulls her legs up onto the couch and lies on her back, easing her friend down on top of her stomach. Tsuyu is hesitant as she settles her weight down.
"Are you sure, Ochako-chan? I'm not too heavy? You can use your quirk to make me lighter if that's better."
Ochako laughs outright.
"Tsuyu-chan, please! You're not heavy at all!" To prove her point, Ochako wraps both arms around her and pulls Tsuyu down right on top of her, sighing happily. "I mean it, Tsuyu-chan. You're fine. Just relax and get some rest."
"Gero…" Tsuyu swallows a little uncertainly, but the beaming smile on Ochako's face is indisputable. So she gingerly slips her arms around to hug her sides very loosely, while Ochako's arms are much stronger and warmer around her. She sighs again.
"You're always the one supporting us, Tsu-chan. So let me support you… for this nap…" She yawns and closes her eyes halfway, still keeping them open a bit to make sure her friend is all right now.
Tsuyu takes a moment to adjust to this very new position, but when she finally pauses to breathe for a second, she discovers just how warm and comfortable it is. She's drawn to Ochako's heat like a frog to the sunlight.
It feels natural, but not just in that sense. It also feels natural in the sense that it just feels right because it's Ochako.
Tsuyu finally relaxes against her, curling a little onto her side as she nuzzles against Ochako's collar. Ochako drapes both arms across her shoulders and the small of her back, still rubbing softly.
"Let's sleep…" she yawns.
"Gero. You're sure you're all right, Ochako-chan?"
"Yeah. I mean it, Tsuyu-chan. Seriously. Thank you."
And that must've been the final reassurance she needed, because not a minute later, Ochako feels the exact second when Tsuyu falls asleep on top of her. Her breathing deepens, and tiny little ribbits slip out here or there. She curls up in Ochako's arms, trusting her to keep her safe.
Ochako knows Tsuyu is usually the last one of the group to ever fall asleep. She tends to stay up and make sure everyone else is accounted for before she retreats to her own room.
So the fact that she trusts Ochako this much - enough to let herself fall asleep first - makes Ochako's heart swell with joy. She's glad she can take care of her for a change.
She keeps her eyes open for a few more minutes, enjoying Tsuyu's warmth and the soft beat of her heart. When the exhaustion does finally start tugging at her conscious, Ochako make sure to say it one more time.
"Thanks, Tsuyu-chan." She tilts her head down a bit and kisses the top of her head, then closes her eyes at last.
They all have their parts to play in everyone else's lives, and sometimes those parts are smaller than others.
But for these two, they each play a very big part for one another.
Perhaps more so than anyone else.
A/N: I was kind of upset the girls pretty much got taken out before they could even fight this week... I figured maybe Ochako could react with that kind of frustration to portray that, and I just love Tsuyu's logical mindset so much so of course she'd try to make her feel better with facts. I just want them to hug, okay...
Please review!
