247A/N: This is my first fanfic and my first attempt at fiction, aside from perhaps some research papers in college ;) This is an AU story of Chuck and Sarah meeting in high school under entirely different circumstances.
Disclaimer: I don't own Chuck
Chapter 1
Since moving to Burbank, Chuck remained his quiet, kind, introverted self. He had no real friends to speak of, except for a few acquaintances he would chat with in various IRC channels. Memories of his parents' arguments and off handed comments from his mother, when she was still around, lead Chuck to the conclusion that he was never really a welcome addition to the family. His father never showed him ill-will but when he was "present" there was little in the way of parental affection. They did at least share similar interests in computers, science and technology but that seemed purely academic. His mother, however, rarely had a kind word to say to Chuck. He hardly recalls her even using his actual name, only seeming to recall her referring to him as "your son" when speaking to his father. She always referred to his sister Ellie as "our daughter" or even "my daughter" on occasion. Although in reality, she didn't have it much better than he did.
Chuck would rack his brain trying to remember a hug or kiss or kind word from his mother but those events either never existed or they were so clouded by time that they were lost to him. Aside from Ellie's and his father's rare one-armed hug, the only regular hugs he could recall were the ones he gave himself in the solitude of his dark bedroom, wondering what he had done that was so wrong? What was it about him that made him so…..unlovable? If not for Ellie, he would truly be alone in the world. While she too had her demons to contend with, Ellie still showed love toward Chuck (as much as a teenage sibling was willing/able to show).
Chuck and Ellie had been accustomed to taking care of each other for years, even before their mother left. Living by themselves in Burbank, while not easy, was an improvement over the oppressive, dark cloud that loomed over their previous suburban home. Sure it was not as nice and spacious as what they were used to, it was home because they had each other. Ellie worked part time jobs throughout high school to provide them with enough money to get by. Chuck helped where he could by teaching older people in the apartment complex how to use their computers or fix them as need be. Ellie encouraged Chuck to put that money away for college as she knew he was destined for greater things. Once Ellie graduated high school she got a day job at a nearby diner and was taking evening classes at a local technical college toward a degree in nursing. His sister was a brilliant and passionate young woman and was determined to better their situation.
The summer before Chuck's sophomore year in high school he managed to befriend a nerdy kindred spirit. Playing arcade games on the Santa Monica Pier, a short and boisterous kid by the name of Morgan Grimes. They became fast friends as they bonded over their shared interest in nerd culture: movies, comic books, video games, music. He and Chuck would spend hours listening to music. The only thing that Chuck kept of his parent's was his Dad's record collection and turntable. His father used to play them after a fight with his mother. Perhaps as a way of coping or finding peace. Similarly, Chuck found a sense of peace listening to the old records and was now finally able to share them with a friend.
School was a special sort of hell for Chuck. While he loved the classes, he was largely considered a social outcast. Being friends with Morgan Grimes did not win him any points in the popularity department either. Morgan tried very hard to be accepted by others which garnered him much unwanted attention. Chuck was not one to stand up for himself, but he would not stand by and watch anyone hurt the only friend he had. This earned Chuck more than his fair share of black eyes and bruised ribs at the hands of bullies and a few un-amused girls due to Morgan's antics. When it was discovered that Chuck would not fight back, even when provoked directly, the Biff Tannen's of the school made a new pastime out of tormenting Chuck.
Despite the occasional ass whoopin' after school, Chuck and Morgan were inseparable. As Morgan was the child of a single mom who had to work two jobs to keep a roof over their head, he spent a great deal of time with Chuck, much to Ellie's chagrin. Chuck liked Morgan's mother a lot as she was very nice to him. A small part of him was rather jealous for the love and attention she paid Morgan.
Morgan was bewitched by Ellie, and while Morgan insisted that their age difference should not stand in their way of true happiness, Ellie assured him (sometimes very painfully) that their age gap would begin to grow much larger if he ever thought about touching her. Since Morgan was Chuck's only friend, Ellie tolerated Morgan as best she could.
At the end of their sophomore year, Chuck received the devastating news that Morgan and his mother were moving to San Diego for a better job opportunity and to be closer to her family. Chuck could tell that while Morgan's mother had been putting on a brave face for months, the financial and physical burden of providing for them was becoming too much for her to handle any longer. Nevertheless, Chuck was heartbroken. At their tearful parting, they agreed to call, chat and email as often as possible. Chuck was struck once again with that all too familiar feeling of loneliness and abandonment. Everyone he cared about left him. What was the point of having friends or forming relationships when all they would do was leave. Chuck resigned himself to look inward, to throw himself into other endeavors to busy his mind. He knew that Ellie had enough going on in her life that she did not need to be bothered with his issues. So he buried his feelings deep inside, locking them away where they could do him no harm. He allowed the logical world to consume him. Computers and gadgets would be his companions now. They were logical and made sense, plus they would never abandon him.
Throughout the remainder of summer and into his junior year, Chuck kept solely to himself. He made no efforts to establish friendships or engage in small talk. To be honest, this was not hard to achieve as nobody seemed to be interested. In fact just the opposite seemed to be true. Many seemed to ignore or purposefully avoid him in the hallways or in class. The only people that paid any attention to Chuck were those that took up the sport of tormenting Chuck. Being the pacifist that he was, he was easy prey for the jocks, mean girls and other jackasses throughout the school. Whoever said that the world was a cruel place surely was referring to high school. Chuck was constantly the butt of jokes, the subject of ridiculous rumors, conspiracy theories on top of the name calling. Most of these were easy for him to ignore as he couldn't care less what they thought of him. He was in school to learn and get into college where he could leave all these people behind him. Unfortunately, entitled douchebags did not always stop at the verbal taunting. Knocking his books from his hands and kicking them down the halls, quick jabs to the back or smacks to the back of the head as they ran down the halls were among the daily rituals Chuck often endured.
After Christmas break, Mr. Burns, Chuck's pre-calculus teacher, approached Chuck and asked if he would be interested in helping to tutor one of the other students in the class. Apparently the student's mother had asked Mr. Burns for some help as their daughter was struggling. She had offered to pay $20 dollars an hour for someone to tutor her and assist in bringing her grades up. Her mother was fearful that her college future could be in jeopardy otherwise. Since Chuck was the top student in the class and well beyond the subject matter of the class, Mr. Burns thought Chuck to be the perfect choice. Chuck was rather hesitant as he was not very adept at talking with people but he thought if he was able to help someone in need he could give it a try. He respected Mr. Burns, who was a good man and well liked. The prospect of earning well more than twice what he made at his after school job would certainly be a bonus as well.
Chuck would meet the student, who he had absentmindedly forgotten to inquire about, in one of the private study rooms in the school library after school. It was a fishbowl type room with one wall being entirely made of glass, because….well teenagers and private rooms tend to lead to ...extracurricular activities. As he anxiously awaited his tutee (ok...he would not refer to anyone as his tutee) he toyed with graphing various functions on his calculator for giggles. The sound of someone clearing their throat startled him from his activities. A beautiful girl with radiant blue eyes and light blonde hair, pulled into a tight ponytail, stood at the doorway holding her books against her chest with both arms.
"H-Hi. I'm Sarah. I guess you're...you're my tutor?" The mildly, sheepish smile couldn't belie the apprehension and embarrassment that were evident on her face and raised shoulders, as if a turtle trying to seek shelter in her shell.
This was Sarah Walker, one of the most popular and beautiful girls in school. She was also an honor roll student, doing well in all of her classes. She was into sports, was on the homecoming court, active in choir and all around beautiful person. She was new to school this year and was quickly approached by the upper echelon of the popular kids to be assimilated into their ranks. While she was part of the popular crowd, she had never been one to participate in the bullying of Chuck or the other social outcasts at school.
Chuck stood up so quickly he knocked his chair over backwards into the wall and then scrambled to try to right it again.
"Umm,..uh..yea...uh..I-I guess so? Mr. Burns never actually told me who I would be tutoring, just to meet here. Is this for...for help in pre-calc?"
Chuck was sweating bullets and he hoped it was not too noticeable. He was not great at talking to people in general, but Sarah was not just people. She was one of the "beautiful people"; the high court of the popular crowd at school that everyone seemed to idolize or fantasize about. Chuck did not care about the social cliques at school, mainly because he was not part of any of them. Despite that, he was not blind. She was very beautiful and had a sweet smile. This girl was so far out of his league it was like they weren't even in the same game.
"Yes. That would be me. I'll be honest, I don't really understand half of this stuff and if I don't get an A in this class, this could hurt my chances to get into a really good college." The sense of anxiety and mild desperation was beginning to creep into the tone of her voice.
Chuck motioned to a chair next to him, hoping the slight tremor in his hands was not noticeable. "Pl-please have a-have a seat and we can get s-started." he choked out as he sat back down in his own chair.
"Um..I'm Ch-Chuck. People-people call me Chuck...I mean people don't really call me but if they did I guess they would call me Chuck. I guess around here people have a lot of other names they use ..uh..for me but...but let's just go with Chuck… yea." Dear god shut up Chuck. She's going to think you're off your meds or something. He took a staggered breath, closed his eyes momentarily and slowly let the breath out in an effort to try to stop his spiraling and focus.
Sarah had a small, sideways smile as she sat listening to Chuck's rambling, "Yea. I know who you are, Chuck."
You do? How in the ..? Oh, right. Same class, social pariah, butt of her friends jokes. Then it dawned on him, and he began to panic. People could not see her with him! He had a scarlet "N" on his chest. If any of her friends saw her with him, she would be ridiculed and likely tossed off her throne of the "beautiful people" high court.
"Um, Sarah… maybe...maybe this isn't the best idea." He paused trying to find the right words.
"Look Chuck, I know this is a hassle, so if it's about the money, I'm sure my-".
"No! No,no,no,no...it's not that at all." exclaimed Chuck. "I just….um...look it's just that...if your friends saw you in here...you know…..with …..with me. It would not be good for you." Chuck looked down in sadness and shame as his hands fidgeting with his pencil, swallowing a large lump in his throat before continuing. "People are not very kind sometimes. I wouldn't want you to get caught up in that."
Sarah stared at Chuck as he spoke with a disbelieving look on her face. He was worried about what might happen to her? Because of a simple tutoring session? If he is just trying to make excuses to get out of this…
"Look, Chuck, I…" Sarah started. As she spoke Chuck shifted his gaze from his lap slowly up to Sarah and she could now see his face fully. Chuck's whole demeanor hit her like a punch to the stomach. He looked as if his spirit had been broken; a deep penetrating sadness. His dark brown eyes bore into her soul and made her heart ache. She knew. She knew what the people in this school had done to him. Namely the people in her social circles. They had thoroughly broken him and yet here he was thinking about how she might catch some grief from her "friends" for being seen with him. She felt so ashamed. Ashamed that she was associated with these people and ashamed for the people that had done this to him. She did not really know this guy very well (nobody did) but she just couldn't understand how you could do these things to another human being.
Sarah was forced to start again after the hitch in her breath. "Chuck, I really appreciate your concern, I do, but I'm not worried. I can deal with them. My main concern is passing this pre-calc class. OK?" She paused for a moment. "Will you help me Chuck? You seem to know this stuff inside and out and I could really use the help. Please?" She anxiously awaited his reply as he sat quietly with a furrowed brow. Eventually his features lightened and the furrow in his brow subsided.
"Ok….Ok I'll...I'll help you. But...but maybe we could find a different place to meet? Some place a little more….I dunno...private?" Chuck's eyebrows immediately shot up as he backpedaled "Not 'private' private! Just ...you know...not so….public?" Ugg. Chuck you're a dumbass.
Sarah broke in slick chuckle, almost as if trying to save him from himself. "I understand what you mean. How about we study at my house? It's over on Greenmeadow close to Pinecrest. Is that area too far away from your place?"
Chuck was speechless for a moment. Had he just been invited into the home of THE Sarah Walker? In her house?! Where she eats and sleeps..? OK. Don't go there Chuck. Don't . Freak. Out. "Um...sure. That's..that's fine with me. That's not too far from my ..uh where - where I live." He didn't want to get into the particulars of his living arrangement so he tried to play it off...poorly.
"Great!" Sarah replied. "Let's go then. We can catch the bus and be there in 20 minutes." Talking over her shoulder as she walked through the library.
Chuck scrambled to collect his things and chase after here. He tried to keep some distance between he and Sarah in case they were spotted together. Maybe people would not believe they were walking together? Who was he kidding? Who would ever believe that she was walking with him? They'd more likely think he was stalking her or something. Sigh.
They hopped on the city bus destined for the north residential areas, finding empty seats across the aisle from one and other. They both sat in silence, Chuck staring out the window looking at all the people and businesses going by. He was not a very good conversationalist, so when in doubt, say nothing. About 20 minutes into their ride, the bus approached a designated stop and Sarah began to stand as the bus slowed.
"This is our stop. Come on Chuck". As she made her way to the front of the bus to exit, Chuck was close behind. They walked in awkward silence for a few blocks. The area was relatively quiet with only the distant white noise of city traffic and the occasional passing card disturbing the peaceful walk.
Chuck was used to not talking around people but this was getting a little awkward even for him. I figured he could break the silence with what he figured people referred to as "small talk".
"This seems like a pretty nice, quiet neighborhood." Chuck stated breaking the silence, almost startling himself.
"Yea. It's pretty decent I guess. It suits us pretty well. Close to shopping and stuff but you don't have a ton of traffic to deal with." Sarah replied. She was grateful to have something to talk about. "So Chuck, you said you don't live too far from here?"
"Uh..yea. It's ...I dunno. Maybe a half mile east of here. The neighborhood isn't nearly as nice but it is what it is." Chuck managed to get out without fumbling too much.
"This is me over here." Sarah pointed to a quaint ranch house ahead on the right. The small front yard and walkway were well maintained with flowers and a few yard ornaments to make it look rather homey.
"Hmm. It's nice." Chuck replied. He briefly recalled the house in the suburbs and felt a little homesick.
Sarah unlocked the front door and walked inside kicking off her shoes and dropping her bag on the bench near the front door. "You don't have to take your shoes off if you don't want. My mom isn't obsessive about it our anything. You want something to drink or a snack?" Sarah offered.
"A..uh..glass of water would be fine if it's not too much trouble?" he responded as he closed the door behind him and followed Sarah to the kitchen.
The house was well decorated with nice furniture and pictures on the walls and bookshelves. The house looked comfortable and lived in but was clean and tidy. Chuck noticed a few family pictures on some shelves. They appeared to contain who he assumed to be Sarah's mother, herself along with a slightly younger girl that looked very similar to Sarah; likely a younger sister. They were clearly all related as they took after their mother. All were blonde and beautiful with the same twinkle in their eyes as they smiled. Chuck noticed that there was no male figure in any of the pictures so he assumed that her father was not in the picture. Chuck filed that little bit of information away. Note to self, don't bring up her father.
"You have a very nice house Sarah. Is this your Mom and sister?" Chuck asked as he gently lifted the picture from the mantle showing it to Sarah.
"Yep. That's me, my Mom and my younger sister Molly. She's in 8th grade so i at least have the rest of the school year before I have to share the halls with her." Sarah snorted as she handed Chuck a bottle of water from the fridge. "We can set up at the kitchen table. My Mom is at work and my sister is probably at soccer practice, so it should be fairly quiet."
Chuck froze immediately from Sarah's comment. "So. Um...isn't that a bit dangerous? I mean to bring someone you don't know to your house with nobody home? Isn't your Mom going to be a little concerned about me being here?" Chuck exclaimed feeling even more apprehensive that he already was about the situation.
Sarah chuckled softly looking at Chuck across the table, "I can take care of myself just fine Chuck, and my Mom trusts me. Plus, it was her idea to hire you in the first place." She set out her notebooks, textbook and pencil. "Why do you ask, Chuck? Should I be worried?" as she raised an eyebrow waiting for his reply.
"What?! No! No. Not at all. Not from me at least. I'm just here to help you with homework and that's it really. Honest!" Chuck became flushed as he began to spiral.
Sarah let out a small laugh into the back of her hand. "I know Chuck. I was just messing with you."
Chuck instantly deflated recognizing her teasing tone. "Oh. Right. I get it." In his signature self-deprecating tone he continued. "I'm sure you'd have no trouble wiping the walls with me. You seem like quite the badass."
Sarah didn't want to start down that rabbit hole, so she changed the subject "Yea. Well, not when it comes to pre-calc. Could you go over the stuff Mr. Burns talked about in class today? I was completely lost."
They spent the next two hours going over the concepts from class today and some topics she was shaky on from the previous couple of weeks. Just as they were finishing some sample problems, the front door opened and Chuck could hear a woman's voice. "Sarah? I'm home. You heard anything from Molly? Oh!?" The woman exclaimed in surprise as she came into the kitchen and saw that there was unexpected company. Chuck immediately stood from the table as it seemed the appropriate thing to do.
"Um. Hello. Who do we have here?" the woman inquired with a raised eyebrow.
Sarah was quick to answer rolling her eyes slightly "Mom, this is Chuck. The tutor you hired for my pre-calc class. Remember?"
Chuck wiped the sweat from his hand on his pant leg thoroughly and extended it toward the woman. "Ms. Walker? I'm..uh.. Chuck. Chuck Bartowski. It's a pleasure to meet you".
The woman looked the tall, lanky young man up and down, eventually taking his hand, "Nice to meet you Chuck. Thank you for agreeing to help Sarah. We really appreciate it".
"Sure. Um. No-no problem at all. I'm glad to help." Chuck replied more than a little intimidated by the older woman. "You know it is getting late and I should probably get going. Ms. Walker it was very nice to meet you and you have a lovely home. Sarah, I'll see you tomorrow I guess. Just let me know what afternoons you need my help." he offered as he packed his bag and readied himself to leave.
"Just one minute Chuck, before you go. There is a matter we still need to discuss." the woman stated sternly. Chuck visibly swallowed the lump in his throat before Sarah's mother continued. "The little matter of your payment? How about I pay you at the end of each week? Would you prefer cash or is a check OK?" she looked on inquiringly at Chuck who took a moment to process what she was talking about.
"Oh. Right! Right. Um...the end of the week is fine and whatever is more convenient for you is fine with me ma'am." Chuck looked between Sarah and her mother for some sign that his response was sufficient.
Ms. Walker finally responded after a moment, "Very well Chuck. I will send payment along with Sarah at the end of the week. Thank you again."
Chuck nodded and started for the door when Ms. Walker interrupted. "Chuck? Would you like me to give you a ride home?"
Somewhat taken aback by the offer Chuck turned and addressed the older woman. "Oh, no. No Ms. Walker. Thank you but I am not actually going home. I have to go to my other job. It's a...it's not too far from here." He caught a glimpse of Sarah's azure eyes over the shoulder of her mother and was momentarily at a loss for words. He couldn't remember ever seeing eyes quite that brilliant a shade of blue. Come to think of it, he couldn't remember a time when he had actually really looked anyone in the eye before. It was then that he noticed that there was a slight rosiness to her cheeks that had not been there before as she looked away quickly at something extremely interesting on an adjacent wall. The world then came rushing back to him and the realization that he had been staring at Sarah for who knows how long struck him. Suddenly finding his shoes quite fascinating as his ears and cheeks became quite warm he stammered. "Well, I uh….I'd better get going. Thanks." Chuck gave a quick smile to the mother and daughter and quickly left.
On the long walk to work, his mind was racing, analyzing the events of the day. This was the most he had talked with….well...anyone really (other than Ellie) in months; and with Sarah Walker no less! She had been quite nice to him all afternoon. She never once made him full like less of a person. Like one of the serfs in the kingdom of the Beautiful People. She was certainly befitting of the moniker but she lacked the bile and disdain for those "beneath" her that others in her "station" tended to have. In fact she treated him like a real person. She listened intently when he spoke and smiled when he made a joke (often times at his own expense). Sarah spoke to him as if they were of the same class; not aristocracy and the …"untouchable". Chuck would almost call it ….friendly.
NO! No,no,no. Get that thought out of your head Bartowski. No good will come of that.
He had already told her that this … arrangement was a bad idea. People would not take kindly to the "classes" mixing, regardless of the circumstances. He would have to keep this as professional as possible and keep those other ridiculous notions out of his head.
She is just a nice person and she was simply being nice. Nothing more. She would do the same to anyone else. You are nothing special Chuck Bartowski. Nothing special…
A/N: Not all sunshine and rainbows I know, but don't lose hope. We can only go up from here. Right? Reviews are appreciated as I'm loved to hear your feedback.
