1It was a dreary, cloudy day at a Cemetary in New York City in 1989, a cute girl was at a grave, putting flowers near the headstone.
She was a young 7-year-old goth girl with black hair and blue eyes. She wears a black headband, a light purple wrist-length shirt under a black sleeveless dress with a black belt around it, white knee-length black tube socks, and black Mary Jane shoes. She seems to wear black lipstick and black eyeliner, and she looked sad.
She then said, "Dad already remarried, I mean, he's happy, but she's not you, and she'll never be. It's not that I don't care about him, it's just that I don't know what to do about this whole wedding thing! I don't want to make him angry, but it's gotten to the point where it's just not the same without you. You have to understand, right?"
Of course, she's talking to someone she lost recently in a gruesome car accident. The girl's mother got her into weird and yet intriguing things like Edgar Allen Poe, Stephen King, gothic things, she was close to her mother.
"Well, I better be going," The girl sighed as it got dark, she left. But as it got cloudier and darker, suddenly, mad Laughter was heard from a distance as we see a laughing 7-year-old boy sitting while leaning towards a grave. He wore a black shirt with a green collar and a DP in the middle, green sleeves and green and white shoes. He had snow-white hair, glowing red eyes with dark lines around them and light turquoise skin. He has pointed ears and fangs. This was the most infamous ghost in history, Danny Phantom. The ghostly boy noticed the audience as a song began.
"Hey, folks! Begging your pardon," Danny sung, getting up as he shrugged. He then cracks his knuckles and continued,
"'Scuse me, sorry to barge in," Now let's skip the tears and start on the whole, Y'know, "Being dead thing"!"
Then, Danny started to fly around the cemetery as he sang, "You're doomed, enjoy the singing! The sword of Damocles is swinging."
Suddenly, this gained the attention of other spirits in the cemetery, who are getting intrigued, except a 1970's teenager on her ghost phone, much to Danny's annoyance.
Danny flies to the 70's Teen girl with a mallet in his hand, singing, "And if I hear your cell-phone ringing, I'll kill you myself."
The 70's teen girl whacks Danny with a frying pan, knocking him to another gravestone.
A dazed Danny said, "The whole being dead thing!"
Getting up, Danny does the charleston on top of a grave of a 40's mobster gang member, much to its spirit's frustration.
"Death can get a person stressed," Danny sung.
A 60's hippie by said, "We should have carpe'd way more diems!"
A 50's preppie girl whined, Now we're never gonna see 'em!"
Danny got between them as he sung, "I can show you what comes next!"
Then, Danny landed on top of a gargoyle as he sung, "So don't be freaked! Stay in your seats, I do this kids' stuff, like, eight times a week. So just relax, you'll be fine, drink your fifty-dollar wine, and take a breath!"
Then all the spirits sung, "Welcome to a show about death!"
Suddenly and calmly, Danny pulled out a ukelele as he sang lightly, "You're
You're gonna be fine
On the other side,"
Then, a death-metal band shouted, "DIE! YOU'RE ALL GONNA DIE! YOU'RE ALL GONNA DIE!"
Danny continued, "I'll...
I'll be your guide
To the other side,"
Then all the spirits went back to the broadway tune as they sang, "Though in full disclosure: It's a show about death!"
Danny then proceeded to dance around the Graveyard as he sang, "Everybody gets on fine here! Like Rodgers, Hart, and Hammerstein here. The women's bathroom has no line here! Just pee where you want, The whole being dead thing! You're just gonna love the folks here."
Suddenly Danny flew by two PC college students glaring at him as he said, "Yeah, I know you're woke, but you can take a joke here, and every show I do, like, a ton of Smile Dip here, The whole being dead thing!"
Then, more spirits came by and Danced with Danny as he sung, "Nobody is bullet-proof,"
Danny tauntingly said, "I work out, I eat clean! Jesus, pass the Dramamine!"
Then, Danny continued to sing, "Time to face the brutal truth. 'Cause we're all on a hit list. Might not live 'till Christmas! Choke to death on Triscuits, Hey, that just statistics. So take a little break here. Kinda like a wake here, The scenery is fake here,"
"BUT THERE'S A GIANT SNAKE HERE!"
Suddenly, a giant black and white striped snake slithers in and takes a screaming spirit with it back to where he came from.
Then all the spirits sung, "Welcome to a show about death!"
In the fashion of a Seth MacFarlane/Sinatra styled song, Danny sung, "You're... you're gonna be fine!"
The spirits applauded as Danny sung, "THANK YOU! On the other side HOW YOU DOIN'?"
He hears someone sobbing and being the insensitive jackass that he is, Danny replies, "Not good?"
Danny goes back to singing, "I'll... I'll be your guide, to the other side!"
Danny then said, "Seriously, though, this is a show about..."
The spirits then sadly sung, "Death is taboo, but it's hardly something new, there's nothing medical professionals can do, 'Cept maybe just bill you!"
Danny shrugged nonchalantly as he said, "If you die while reading this fanfic parody, it's still gonna keep going."
The spirits then sadly sung, "There's no destiny or fate, just a terrifying wait! Filled with people that you hate, and on a certain date, the universe kills you!"
Danny then sadly sung, "That's the thing with life: No-one makes it out alive..."
Danny then went back to singing with insensitive joy as he sung, "Toss that body in the pit! "Gosh, it's awful, ain't it tragic?" "Blah, blah, Bible. Jesus magic." When you're dead, who gives a shit? No pilates, no more yoga, "Namaste", you freakin' posers! From the cradle to cremation, death just needs a little conversation!"
Then, suddenly, a giant gravestone is rising out of the ground as Danny and the ghostly spirits sung,
"I have mastered the art (Dies Irae!)
Of tearing convention apart (Dies Irae!)
So, how about we all make a start (Dies Irae!)
The gravestone revealed to be 3 gargoyles pointing at the gravestone's saying: Here Lies Danny Phantom!
On the big finale, Danny flew to the top of the gigantic gravestone that was his as he and the spirits sung,
"On the whole...
Being...
Dead Thing!"
Thunder and Lighting were heard as Danny laughed like mad while the Spirits danced and sung.
They all sung as they said, "God, I hope you're ready for a show about death!"
Lightning flashed as Danny and the other spirits disappeared, and so begins our story...
