Chapter 4

That night James found himself without his usual humor.

"It's usually quite humorous, a ghost sleeping, but tonight my mind is on other things" thought James, his mind restless as he stared bemused at the ceiling of his room. He couldn't sleep at all because he couldn't help wondering if Elizabeth leaving just after Lorretta was a bad omen. He had women on the brain, each important to his life story, but each plagued his mind so that he couldn't quite blink without seeing one of them. Elizabeth, the woman he had mistaken for his second chance. Lorretta, the woman who had always inspired him to be and do what other said was impossible, who had loved him, and left him without any choice at all. Finally, there was Lorretta Walker, someone who he didn't quite know what to do with. She had utterly shocked him with that kiss on the cheek and he longed to see how she would shock him next. He somehow knew this was his true second chance. His chance to be with his Lorretta again after their story had been abruptly ended. It all had James' mind in a tales spin.

In his time as a ghost, James had often thought of his time with Lorretta, but never so much to say he dwelled on it. He often wondered if his life would have ended the way it did if Lorretta hadn't died. He wondered where their lives would have left them. If children might have been in their future or maybe if it would have been the two of them forever. He wondered what she would have thought of the Cortez, the hotel he built in his grief for her, and if she would have considered it fitting to honor her memory. Most of all, he missed the soft touch of her skin, and the lilt of her voice. The soft kiss of her lips on his own. James thought he would have those things again with Lorretta Walker, but he was afraid to let himself give in to expectation. James knew he had experienced the same thing with Elizabeth, but now was different. He somehow sensed that this was real. It wasn't like with Elizabeth, who had done these things merely to reel him in, not because she loved him, but because she wanted his money.

"I was just a makeshift possession for the man she could never have" thought James, he had realized it after he had died, when he noticed the way she seemed only to think of him as a possession, her husband, but any mention of his past, and she became silent, it was a silence that used to kill him.

"I should never have married her" thought James, as another memory passed over him, one that secure the very thought in his mind. It didn't come when she tried to run off with the film star or when she saw him kill the first time; it came when she discovered a photo of Lorretta he had hidden away.

"Elizabeth?" called James, entering his office that day to find her standing with her back to him in front of his desk, and before he could say anything else the photo that he'd in a drawer in his desk was thrown at him.

"Who's the pretty girl, James?" said Elizabeth, her voice not even raising an iota as she turned looking quite calmly at him only frowning as he paid her no mind choosing to focus on picking up the picture as it lay on the floor after hitting the wall. James hadn't answered her at first as he picked up the picture of Lorretta.

She had paid to have it taken and given it to him before they were married. Her hair was swept over her shoulders, she appeared to be looking off into the distance, and she was smiling. When he ignored her that only made it worse?

"Who is she, James?" said Elizabeth remaining calm even as she came closer to him. James still didn't answer until she went to snatch the photo out of his hands.

James grabbed her wrist, a wild look in his eye as he did. She snatched it back as he was looking between her and the photo. James seemed to caress it with his fingers then as his eyes centered on the love of his life and back to his current wife. He felt Elizabeth staring at him but ignored it. There was something almost tender in him now, something that had died with his beloved first wife, but returned when his thoughts strayed to her once more. Elizabeth felt utterly bewildered at it as she experienced it for the first time in that moment.

"This woman was my first wife" snapped James, pushing Elizabeth harshly away. He put emphasis on the first part as he walked away.

"Interesting…I thought that was me" said Elizabeth still remaining calm as she followed him with her eyes, her body pivoting to do the same, the whole time wanting him to look at her as he sat behind his desk not bothering to do so. When he did, she was still standing where he'd left her.

Elizabeth was at her mostly deadly when she was silent. Most would have thought it was when she was yelling or screaming, but when she was silent there was something about her that chilled him. Her face was calm, her eyes cool and scathing, but it was her hands. They were clenched into fists at her side, her whole form was swaying as if in a one on one dance, and after a moment he noticed the tears that seemed to blend in with the white of her face.

"It appears there are more secrets you've failed to tell me other than the fact that you enjoy killing little nobodies in your spare time" whispered Elizabeth in that moment, her voice shrill as she lingered all the closer. After a moment, she turned, the look in her eyes ferile, each step as she approached precise. James had been waiting for her to scream. For some womanly theatrics that he had come to expect from women, but Elizabeth didn't do any of that. She only slapped him across the face. He had expected it, but when he looked at her again, he wasn't expecting her to repeat the action. When he looked again, Elizabeth was leaning over his desk, her eyes peering into his, and James found he feared her for the first time. Elizabeth looked unwaveringly into his eyes as her hand went around his throat. She held him in place and that was when the calm fell away. She looked at him with such rage in her eyes. James wasn't sure if it was because he'd lied to her or because there had been another before her, but after it was over, he had his answer. It was because he was not solely hers the way he wanted, but that he would always belong to a woman that was very much dead.

"You married me. It doesn't matter whether I'm your first wife or your hundredth…you are mine to do as I please and so is this hotel. No dead woman can or will overshadow me. It is all mine and believe me, James…I'll do what must be done to keep all I've gained" exclaimed Elizabeth her eyes a wicked black as they looked into his. James had never been afraid of his wife until that moment. Afraid she might leave him, yes, but never afraid she could end his life. After that day though, he knew he hadn't married any ordinary woman, but someone not to be disregarded. When she flung him with ease back into his chair, James only looked after her as she stood straight up and watched him with eyes that had retained their calm. She left the room then with his eyes still on her. His eyes never left her as she did, and they hadn't since. His hand had gone instinctively to his throat and James had thought for a moment that his wife was going to kill him. That she would be the reason he died. He didn't know how she would do it or when, but he had thought it. He hadn't considered it as more then a thought until he died. After that James had found out so many things about his wife. About her immortality. She was no longer some actress with nothing on her side, but she had turned into what she was now. The Countess. Someone to be feared and guard yourself against. She was poison, James realized, and he had murdered himself the second he said I do. It took her hand around his throat to make him truly realize that.

"She never loved me, she loved the smell of my money" thought James after that, remembering all the times she'd simply ignored him when he said the words to her. She always only seemed to care about the money and the circles it put her in.

"She turned me in because she wasn't the love of my life, but the worst mistake of my life" thought James, as the memory faded. James had died mere weeks after this had happened. As he thought of it then though, he didn't feel remorse over having never told Elizabeth, but instead, remorse over having married her at all. He hadn't been heartbroken over her but felt only disappointment. Part of him had hoped when he died that he would see Lorretta again in the afterlife, but she wasn't there. He had remained in the hotel where he had been left to think of her in the afterlife as he had in death. Where he had been left to watch Elizabeth turn the Cortez into the emptiness it was today. He had lost all hope of seeing Lorretta again until she had returned to him again.

"Ms. Walker has made her so much more then a memory now" thought James in that moment thinking of the two women side by side, one a memory that he would always have, and the other her likeness.

"I would not be the man I am without Lorretta" whispered James, remembering the unfaltering confidence she always had in him; it was akin to the trust Ms. Walker had now. For a while, he had thought you could only love like that once. He had lived to dwell on his former wife and then she had returned to him. Lorretta Walker had appeared, and he found himself invigorated again. His afterlife was not merely a time spent killing the worthless. She gave it new meaning. James found himself thinking of her and wondering what she was doing as he was. It reminded him of when he first met his wife. How he had been the same way.

That night James couldn't help thinking of his younger self. A man who had once believed that he'd never find love at all. Who had pined after Lorretta Wilson until forces beyond his control had pushed them together? As James was finally closing his eyes to go into his ghostly sleep, he was thinking of that night. He had been going over the books with no one else around. Walter had left him to watch over things. The wind was blowing branches up against the building and that was the only sound until the door opened with a chime. James looked up from his book just as Lorretta Wilson stumbled into the shop looking a chaotic yet beautiful mess.

The wind had swept her beauty around, but as she stood collecting herself, James had found himself utterly speechless as he gazed unabashedly at her. Her hair covered her face and as she moved it away with her hands, James noticed the intricate way she pushed it behind her ears. Once there he had a perfect view of her face, so pale, and her eyes looking at him yet not at the same time. There was something bewitching about the way she looked at him then as if waiting for something unexpected.

"Hello Mr. March" said Lorretta, her voice flowing over a young James like the wind just outside of the door as she stepped towards the counter he stood behind.

"Is something the matter or do you stare at every girl that comes into this shop?" whispered Lorretta, breaking him out of his revelry his eyes stuck on the shape of her face as she leaned against the counter towards him. As she watched him then James didn't know how to respond at first. He had never felt this way around a woman before. All the others he'd been around had been just girls, but this one seemed to capture every part of him with her very presence. James didn't know what to make of it or do about it as he stared continuously at her.

"You face is perfect" whispered James, not even realizing it as the words left his mouth.

Lorretta's smile at those words had been brilliant.

"I hope that means I'm the only girl you share at" exclaimed Lorretta on a laugh. She looked at him with those eyes then her eyes glowing like embers in a fire. He loved the way she'd looked at him in that moment as if no one else mattered. She always looked at him like that. Like he was the most important man in the world. It had taken him too long to realize that was because to her, he was. James knew now it had been love at first sight. That together, they had been utterly caught up with each other, and that had never really ended. James remembered looking into those eyes and feeling love. He had never been able to deny her anything because of it. Because all she had to do was look at him and he was hers. Lorretta could give him the power he needed when she looked into his eyes. She could make him speechless and tongue tied. She could inspire him in both a great kill and a great investment. Lorretta was his greatest strength and he hadn't felt weak until he'd lost her. All these years, James had been weak, but now that those eyes had returned, that she had returned, he felt powerful again. On that day in the shop though, Lorretta had made him nothing, but tongue tied.

"Yes, I mean…I'm sorry if it bothers you. Does it…I mean, bother you?" exclaimed James, it was the first time he had been at a loss for words since he was a boy.

"it depends who's staring…since its you…I'm say no. I kind of like when you stare" said Lorretta, smiling at the look that appeared on his face. Nothing else was said between them as she handed him her list of things. As James gathered them for her, he was still watching her, and taking note of everything she did. The way she swayed on her feet in her graceful yet flowing way. The way she licked her lips and tilted her head to the side to watch him as he worked. James found he liked being watched by her as he rang up her purchases. James had been with a few women before, but with Lorretta he had made up his mind. She was the most enticing girl he'd come upon. They didn't speak again until she was preparing to leave, and she was struggling to get out the door with her load of groceries when Walter entered the shop through the back.

"James! What on earth are you doing letting Lorretta leave like this without even offering to help her home. I thought I taught you better. You walk her home with those groceries right now" snapped Walter his voice coming as a boom from the end of an aisle. James instantly did as he said taking the bags. It was as they were leaving the shop that he thought he saw Walter smile. James knew now it had all been a part of the plan to get him to talk to the pretty girl.

"Be a man, Jimmy" said Walter as he had passed him, his hand thumping him on the back in what he thought then was anger, but what had really been a type of encouragement that hurried his steps as he left the shop with the pretty girl.

James had been nervous walked side by side with her. He kept thinking of things to say to her, but nothing seemed right. Walter had said to be a man, but he wanted to impress her. He didn't know how to do that as he watched her out of the corner of his eyes. She had had to start a conversation with him.

"I don't think I've ever met anyone quite like you, Jimmy March" said Lorretta breaking the long silence and in doing so changing everything. They had walked in silence until Lorretta had said that clearing her throat making him look at her.

"So, what's your plan, Jimmy March?" said Lorretta, looking at him as she walked by his side.

"Don't say you don't got one…I can see it in your eyes that you do" said Lorretta, her eyes always on him as he walked by her side feeling amazed that she seemed to see so much about him already.

"You have that look about you, Jimmy, like you're gonna be someone great" said Lorretta, his eyes not being able to look away then as she said that, finding her more beautiful then ever before as she walked beside him in her simply gray dress with her skin shining in the low light.

"No one's ever seen that, but me" whispered James, truly looking at her now. She looked right back with no hesitation and that was the first time he felt it. The connection with her that he'd never found in anyone else. She somehow knew that he was going to be something, and they had only just met. It was the first time James had been utterly astounded by anyone in his life. It was the first time someone had believed in him who wasn't Walter Fitz. That was why he marveled at her the way he did in that moment.

"Well, Mr. Fitz said he was teaching you a thing or two. What do you hope to get out of it?" exclaimed Lorretta, she was smiling with those eyes flashing in a viscous simplicity. It had attracted him, not just his heart, but every part of him until looking at her, James felt a distinct connection. No one had ever asked him what he wanted before.

"I want to be a wealthy man who people won't look down upon. I want to be better than my father. I want people to treat me with respect" exclaimed James all at once. There was some vigor in him then as he let it all out. He had never let any of that out. He always kept it where only he could see, but now, she saw it too. Walter didn't even understand and yet, this girl who he barely knew saw him better then those who had. It shook him even as it enlightened him. It made it so he couldn't take his eyes off her in that moment. During it all, James had stopped moving, and together they stood in the center of the road. Lorretta was still standing right next to him, watching him, and as their eyes stared linked together, James realized as she came closer to him. Her hand touched his shoulder and he found he felt a warmth in her touch. They didn't keep walking for a long time and when they did, there was something between them, but neither of them quite knew what it was yet.

"I think you will be better than your father, Jimmy. I think you have the potential to blow this whole world away…I just hope I get to see it" said Lorretta after they started walking again her eyes filled with a type of raw emotion that was strictly for him when her eyes met his. She didn't say another word to him the rest of the way to her house. She only walked why his side, her eyes watching him until they reached her house. He left the groceries on the porch and moved to walk away. As he did, he could feel her watching him, and he watched to look back at her. He didn't though, not until she called out to him. At first, he just stopped, his back still turned to her. He didn't know what he'd find when he looked at her again.

"Jimmy" called Lorretta, her voice softer now making him turn around to walk back towards her.

James found himself standing at the edge of her porch with her body mere inches from his. As she stood on the top step, he had to look up at her, and he saw that same raw emotion illuminated in her eyes. When she touched his cheek with a gentle hand, he looked right at her letting her see his surprise, and she had only smiled. Her touch had been soothing even then as she used it to make him look at her.

"I hope you do everything you want in this life, Jimmy. I'll be thinking about you…because I think you're meant to be something…I'm not sure what, but I think you do. Just don't give up" said Lorretta, as she finished, she smiled. Her eyes wouldn't let his drift away. They peered unabashedly into his and James had been tempted to kiss her. It was the first time he ever wanted to do that, but it wouldn't be the last. He didn't kiss her though, the time hadn't been right, but he hoped he would get a second chance as he took a step back. What he didn't know though was that she wasn't done speaking yet. She caught him before he could. Stepping down from the porch, she was looking into his eyes as she stood at his height now, and James could only watch her. He didn't know what she was going to do. She had him on the edge of the world as she just stood there looking right at him.

"I hope I won't be seeing you just when I go into Mr. Fitz's store. I'd like it very much if you came to call one of these days. You're the most interesting gentleman this place has to offer" exclaimed Lorretta, her voice running over him like the wind had her. She touched his face again as if to assure him she meant it. When her hand left his cheek, James thought now was his time to leave, but she wouldn't let him go yet. Not until her lips touched his cheek in a chaste kiss. Only then did she step back onto her porch, her eyes twinkling in the dull light of the coming twilight leaving him to walk away with his eyes always straying back to see if she was still there.

The smile wouldn't leave his face that night. He was in love with Lorretta Wilson. As James closed his eyes, he was still in love with his Lorretta, but now, he found himself utterly besotted with her image returned to him. When James finally slept, he was happy and scared and uncertain. He didn't know how anything would turn out with Lorretta Walker, but he hadn't known how they'd turn out with Lorretta Wilson either. He had merely taken a shot in the dark and it had paid off. He had had the greatest experience of his life and now, he might do it again.