Author's note: This is my second story. I would love it if you leave a review as I am new to this and would love some advice.

DRM

His Part

Chapter one

Guilt has become such a huge part of him now that he wasn't sure he would stop feeling it ever again.

He probably wouldn't.

It was such a horrible feeling, constantly gnawing away at his insides and squeezing his heart so painfully that he wanted so bad to rip his chest open and claw away at everything within reach until it all went away.

And he deserved every bit of it.

He left them, left her, and he deserved it.

Actually, he deserved to be punished with much more than that.

He sat on a small rock just outside the tent with his limps drawn tightly to his chest and his head resting on his knees. The freezing air of January scalded every bit of skin exposed, the heat from Hermione's jar of blue fireballs offering no comfort. Every once in a while the idea of getting a blanket crosses his mind, only to be quickly wiped away as he remembered that he gave his to Hermione last night.

"It's really cold tonight, isn't it?" said Harry with a sigh.

"Oh yes, it is." Ron replied with a nod while Hermione hummed her agreement without raising her eyes from her book.

"Well, I guess I'll head to bed now. I'll have second watch." Harry gave a pointed look to Ron that clearly said 'Don't wake me up and you're dead.'

Ron smiled sheepishly and mumbled goodnight to his friend before returning his attention to Hermione. She had mumbled goodnight without looking up, too engrossed in whatever it is she was reading. They sat in silence for a few minutes, Hermione reading on while Ron gathered his courage to speak to her. He got himself so nervous he ended up blurting out "Third right?"

She didn't look up, but her eyes, which had been sliding over the words, froze.

"Third watch, I mean, you're taking third watch right?" He said, clearing his throat and rubbing the back of his neck nervously.

"First" She answered in a clipped tone.

"Um…" He thought about telling her that she looked worn out and needed to rest, but he knew that she will bite his head off if he did. "I….well I'm wide awake and…well…I want to take first watch and…and…well yeah." 'Oh, great job Weasley, you failed to convince her and totally made a fool out of yourself at the same time. Way to go!' He thought sarcastically.

She was silent for a long time, such a long time that he started to believe that she wouldn't even answer.

"Fine" She finally said after what seemed like forever, before standing up and waking briskly towards her bunk. "Wake up Harry at one." She said as she marched by him.

He knew why she needed to say that. The last two nights he took first watch, claiming to wake up one of them when the second watch started, before spending the whole night fighting sleep outside and preparing himself for their anger in the morning. The first night was awarded with glares from Harry the whole morning, while Hermione, surprisingly, didn't comment. The second night earned him lots of harsh words from Harry the following morning while Hermione gave him a single glare that hit him harder than any word Harry had said. Oh, what he would give for her to break the silent treatment and start talking to him again…

Surprisingly, he didn't even feel tired, not anymore. He knew as soon as he had this thought that he wouldn't wake up anyone tonight.

Getting up, he went to his bunk and lingered next to it, uncertain. 'Would she snap at him if he offered her his blanket?' He didn't want to make it worse than it already was. He decided to risk it if she will be more comfortable.

"Here," he mumbled softly, standing at the foot of her bunk with an arm outstretched, blanket in hand. "I'm wearing really heavy cloth and I won't be needing it, so…" he trailed off, cheeks turning bright red.

She stared at him for a long time, seated cross legged on the bunk, and was each second passing he felt himself heat up even more. Finally, when he thought that his whole body was going to burst into flames right there and then, he carefully placed the blanket in front of her before practically out of the tent and into the wonderful cold outside.

His body gave another violent shiver as he jerked awake from another microsleep. Not sleeping for three days straight has set him in a state that was past tiredness, past exhaustion. He was feeling oddly hyper, but when settled down his body goes into a very slow state of falling asleep that he shakes off very early.

'They need to rest,' he kept telling himself. 'They need to sleep. They do far more than you do every day. Letting them rest is the least you could do. You had enough rest at the cottage while they were suffering here…'

After he had woken himself up for the third time in fifteen minutes, he shook his body to stretch it before checking his watch. It was almost five in the morning, meaning that he had finished Harry's watch and was almost halfway through Hermione's. Yawning widely, he decided to get himself a cup of tea to keep himself warm and pass the time.

He was halfway to the kitchen when his masked exhaustion finally caught up with him. A violent wave of dizziness hit him, making him sway and reach blindly out for anything to cling on. He managed to grab the edge of the table, blinking rapidly and taking deep breaths in an effort to shake it off. Everything was spinning and the longer he stood there, the dimmer the room became in the faint morning light. Slowly, he felt his breathing deepen as the room disappeared from sight. The table left his grip and he thought he distantly heard something slam onto the ground.

He didn't feel anything at all after that.