4"Goats. Why did it have to be goats?"
The furry animals where everywhere now. Stuck in the several rows of bookshelves at the edge of the circular room, frolicking about on the wooden floor, and rummaging through several storage chests. One was even struggling not to fall off the floating golden chandelier above, casting a large moving shadow across the room.
In the center of the room was a large mahogany desk covered with paper, books, and yet another goat which sat upon it. Sitting at the desk was a woman with short white hair that went down to her chin. She wore royal blue silk dress with a silver silk belt that held a crescent shaped knife. Currently she was facepalming on the desk and reflecting upon what had just happened.
The Sorcerer had tried to fuse a frog with a chair just to see what would happen. The answer was, apparently, you get a frog stuck in a chair. Who knew? But the results of that experiment weren't the issue here. The issue was her.
Being a magical construct she was made out of pure magical energy. However, her creators had cearly messed up somewhere because the energy within her was extremely unstable. Sometimes when casting a spell something unintended could happen from getting a keg of beer to time travel. This Magical Force, as she had taken to calling it, acted completely randomly in both activation and result, making it impossible to predict save for one factor. It always happened when casting a spell. Everytime she casted something, she might as well have been flipping a coin or rolling a die.
Whenever it happens, her senses would seem to just know what was happening, but the details were always muddled. For instance, when she had tried to fuse the frog and chair, she suddenly knew that goats had been created around her. She didn't know that there were exactly twenty of them.
"Uh… Hello?" The Sorcerer turned to see a young man in the doorway. He was carrying a box. Ah, delivery. "I-If I may ask… Why the goats Mis?"
"Who's mis? I'm Six, and everything is fine!" Six's face turned a dim shade of red as she got up from her chair, weaving through a few goats to get to the man. As she spoke, the goat hanging from the chandelier fell, giving out a cry as it fell to the ground.
"Right right! Subject Six. Sorry, first day." The man shifted uncomfortably, backing away from a few goats that were approaching him. "You, uh, really look like you have everything under control…"
"Indeed. I do have everything under control." One of the goats in the storage chests started glowing pink. Six glanced back, then sighed. "Is that all the stuff I requested?"
"Yes. I think. I don't actually know what's in it." The man admitted.
"No one ever does." Six took the box, then turned around and went to the center of the room, setting it down by her desk. She then opened it and started sorting through it all.
There was a long awkward silence as the delivery man just stood there while Six confirmed the contents of the package. She then looked back. "Why are you still here?"
"O-oh am I not suppose t-"
The man was cut off as Six skipped enthusiastically across the room to stand in front of him. "You want to see me work my magic don't you!?" She said, smiling widely.
"Well… I…"
"Come! Come!" Six grabbed him by the wrist and pulled him to the desk and into the chair. "Just sit her- Oh the chair is comfortable right?"
"...Yes?" The man replied cautiously.
"Oh good. It's been two years since I've had the thing replaced and frankly chairs don't stay in good condition… Not to imply that I can't maintain a chair magic is great for that." Six said quickly, immediately moving to defend herself.
"Two years? How long have you been here?" The man asked.
"Oh well, I've been in this room my entire life." Six replied.
"Wait… Just this room?" The man raised an eyebrow.
"Well yeah. I mean it use to be that all sorts of faceless grey people came in here and performed tests with me but that stopped a while back and now I only get the occasional one. Like you!" Six bent down and pulled several yellow candles from the box.
The man crossed his arms. "Huh? Excuse me, but I'm not a faceless grey person."
Six turned to him, now holding a jar of blood along with her candles. "Of course you are. Look at yourself. You've got no features whatsoever!"
"What no! Look! I've got black hair." He pointed to his head.
"Oh… You're in denial." Six said nodding solemnly. "What was it… Ah. Sorry, for your loss. I'm sure it will grow back." She patted the man on the shoulder then walked out into the open space in front of her desk. She put down the candles and jar of blood, then a few blue sparkles floated from her hand onto the items. The jar broke, then the blood inside it started flowing across the floor. It made several triangles, then connect them to make a pentagram.
"Ooooookay. If you're about to do some demonic magic I'm going to g-" The man halted just as he was about to stand up. The candles had all floated onto the pentagram, but instead of going to every end like he expected they had formed a smiley face on it. Six snapped her fingers and the candles lit.
"You misunderstand. This isn't demonic at all. Here, I'll show you." Six hopped over to a goat and grabbed it. She then walked back into the center of the pentagram and pulled out her knife.
"But… Goat sacrifice is demonic…" The delivery man said, watching a goat crawl into the box and lay down.
"Sacrifice? No I'm just cutting off it's limbs so it doesn't walk away." The man closed his eyes and winced as Six started crudely hacking off the goats legs. After a few seconds of not hearing any screams of agony as the animal has maimed, he opened his eyes to see a legless goat calmly laying in the middle of the pentagram. A white steaming liquid was pouring from it's wounds, but it didn't seem to be in pain at all. Six chucked the final leg to the side, then turned back to the man. "I should explain shouldn't I? Gah! Two years of solitude really messed up my presentation! Alright, you see that raw magical energy flowing from the goat?"
The man sighed, shaking his head. "Yes."
"That's the same stuff I'm made of, meaning that these goats are magical constructs like me. Exactly like me. I wouldn't be surprised if they could cast spells. Now, these goats came to be from my… Condition… So I'm thinking that if I were to deconstruct the thing I might find out how to fix myself."
The man thought for a second. "Alright. That makes more sense. But what is with the pentagram and candles? That will screw everything up, not to mention that they're not even arranged correctly!"
"Hmmm. Know a bit about magic do you?" Six asked.
"You have to be pretty good to get in here so, yes." The man answered.
"Ah. Well relax. It's just decoration. I don't need this to deconstruct something." She smiled, then turned towards the goat. "Now behold! After I dissect this beast I will cure my instability! I will finally be of use to my creators, and all of Eberron will know my power!"
Two blue magic circles appeared below and above the goat, then the apathetic animal started to slowly dissolve. Six's smile became devious as she started soaking up information that only she could read. "Yes… Yes… Come o- eh?"
Portal to a different dimension.
Six's instinct kicked in, indicating that her magic was going haywire. Below the goat there was a blinding flash of light as a portal rapidly grew beneath it. The goat fell through. "Oh come o- Woah!" Six tumbled in as the portal passed under her feet, then it abruptly closed.
The man, who had shielded his eyes from the light, put his hand down. The dissolving goat, the candles, and Six had all disappeared. Now all that was left was a glowing pink goat who was staring at him from the other side of the room while chewing on a few pages from a book.
"Right… Uh… We can both agree that she was a lunatic right?" The man asked.
"Meow." The glowing pink goat replied.
The man nodded, then started questioning his sanity. "O-Okay. Good."
A/N: Now, I know you're wondering. Did I just slam my D&D character into a fic and decide to do a crossover? The answer is, well, heck yes. It's going to be interesting to see how this turns out. Hope you all enjoy!
