151Updated: 08/27/2019* Rated M.
"Of Lessons and Liars."
Violet felt hyperaware.
Last night, she went to bed with dreams of green going through her head.
She blamed this on Cattleya and Luculia. She had to. It was only after their cruel yet lovable goading, that they had forced her into explaining the whole story. It started from the moment she had left the CH Postal Company, completely unaware of the adventure that awaited her, then coming to the cottage by the sea, the shoot-out with Sophie, seeing Dietfried, and at last learning that the Major was alive.
They held her for a moment when she got teary-eyed.
Then she continued the story of the Duchess sending her to the Major's little hut, sitting on his cot, conversations at the Big House with the Bougainvillea brothers, the key the Major gave her for this room, the hug and words they shared, and to continue on until they got to the conversations on the beach before Cattleya and Claudia had found them.
"You love him, you got it so bad!" Cattleya squealed when it became too much.
"Oh yes she does." Luculia winked conspiratorially. "Cattleya, didn't you say the Major won't know what hit him?"
"Well," she threw her envious raven hair over her shoulder. "After that story, I am sure Violet did that a few times already."
They giggled like co-conspirators.
Violet sighed deeply.
She blamed them for getting her to rant about the Major's remaining eye, more precious to her than the gem she wore around her neck, and the things he had told her at the Sea. They kept talking about their own lovers, and as they chitchatted about their own love stories, Violet kept fantasizing of what the Major would think if he saw her now. Here, blushing on her bed. Dressed in her sheer underthings, soft pale gown, racing heart, and relentlessly blushing cheeks. It was completely embarrassing, but she couldn't help it.
Her friends giggled when she got so frustrated, she bit into her metallic hand. The metal twang settling her troubled belly.
"Stop it." Violet whined.
Her friends giggled more, and so she dreamed of green that night.
Emerald. Candy apple. Electric. Army. Fern. Sea. Shamrock. Jade. Pigment. Pine. Viridian. She had gone through half of them by the next morning when the sun rays woke her.
Red sky rising, the purples, dark blues, and umber fading fast from the horizon. She was not surprised when bright gold fingers returned, creeping up from the glass windows and doors of the balcony, and bleating a loud good morning to everyone and everything.
Instead of rolling back into her Master bed, pulling the white plush covers over her head, and going back to sleep (as Cattleya had done immediately beside her), Violet woke that morning in the writing mood.
She needed to write. She needed to feel her fingers dancing on the typewriter. Feeling more like herself, she slipped on a robe that was in wardrobe, some soft feathered slippers that had been on the floor of the wardrobe and found Luculia had already left them. Her old classmate had written a short-scripted letter reminding Violet to meet her for Lunch. Apparently, they had an agenda and lessons plans to go over, and she smirked at working beside Luculia, just as they had done when they were students.
Violet smirked a second time when Cattleya did not wake to her typing.
Perhaps type a bit quieter next time, she remembered Cattleya had once told her.
Now Violet was going at a lighting pace, but quietly.
She finally finished Sophie's letter, grinning as she read it over, and sealed it with the red stamp of the CH Postal Company. She would give it to Sophie, and the Duchess' meddling bodyguard/maid could be the one to give it to the Major.
Violet then went on to her next letter, one that was addressing Claudia from her. As the President, Claudia Hodgins had every right to have an in-depth report-explanation of what had occurred. She sighed a heavy breath, biting her hand out of habit, and concluding Claudia's letter with her acceptance working at the Seagrave Orphanage.
She tapped her chin for a moment, smiling widely, and then got to finishing Claudia's letter.
I humbly accept the temporary position to write for the Seagrave Orphanage, and will run classes beside the Instructor Luculia Marlborough. I assume responsibility of the role that will be decided by the responsible parties and will strive to represent the CH Postal Company in all the ways that fit my scope of function as an Auto Memories Doll.
Sincerely,
Violet Evergarden
Her mind immediately went back to last night.
The Major had been so happy.
She remembered him chuckling in her ear, stealing glances as they took the Duchess' tour, and whispering so she would have to bend her head closer to his.
He had a very nice smile, she never really saw it till now, there were not many things to smile about in War. But it wasn't just that he had a nice smile, it was more than that. There was a fire behind him that Violet had sensed since the beach, and it… captivated her, and there was nothing close to how he looked at her. Even though he had not finished his story, something about him was calling to her. It was like she was drawn to him through his voice, eyes, mouth, blood in his veins, and that was all types of weird. Violet was even scaring herself. She bit her palm more, imagining burning green eyes and soft stubble and skin of his shaved jaw.
"Pull yourself together Violet." She stopped herself, rubbing the crust from her eyes, and trying to break the Major's spell on her.
It was a scream that brought her out of her fantasy.
"Cattleya!" Violet was on the bed before Cattleya got a second scream. "I am here. I'm right here."
She was shaking.
"Was it a nightmare?"
Her shaking friend didn't even nod. She just sat there, holding her knees to her chest, violet eyes wide, and fixated on the wall. Cattleya had never looked so lost, as if she had opened her eyes and the nightmare was still here, the fear only getting worse.
"You are safe Cattleya. You are safe."
That made her respond. "You're wrong."
"What's wrong, you can talk to me?"
"I can't."
"I will help you." Violet tells her, even when she is not sure if she could, but whatever could help her get out of whatever this was, she willing to do it, and still her friend is not satisfied. She had to get Cattleya talking. Keeping it inside only made it worse, Violet knew only too well. "What did you dream about?"
"It was a nightmare," Cattleya finally refocused her stare, right back at her friend, and Violet felt a slither of her fear. Her friend whispered. "You're in danger Violet." She could see the white in Cattleya's eyes.
"What do you mean in danger?" Violet urged her to continue. "You have to tell me. For me to understand what is happening you need to tell me."
Cattleya only shook her head, and closed her eyes, refusing to open them.
All Violet could do was hold her.
O0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0O
"When did she get like this?"
Claudia leaned back on the wooden bench, sighing loudly underneath the gazebo and relentless summer noon-sun, "it happened two nights ago."
"This isn't the first time?"
"No. It's not." His tone gave more Violet more than she was ready for. This was not the first nightmare that Cattleya had, and something told Violet that this might not be the last one either.
"I see." At least it felt safe now, the light of day pushed back all the shadows.
The garden was overflowing in blooming roses, pollen floating on the breeze, creating a sanctuary of privacy for both him and Violet to talk about Cattleya's nightmare.
"Violet." Claudia brought her back to the conversation. There was something troubling in his eyes, they seemed to have more energy than before. "This is reason why we came to see you. She had to make sure you were safe."
"I am safe." If what he really meant was, "and they caught the assassin at the cottage by the sea." Violet had heard Sophie tell the Major and Captain Dietfried about her report of the events.
The Duchess' guard had made secure the Orphanage and Summer Palace, checked the grounds, and that was proof enough of their safety. Even Sophie had said they found no other suspects. No other leads. Sophie, whom had once been a spymaster had guaranteed it, "we are all safe now." And she reminded Claudia of this.
"I know what Gilbert and Sophie said." He revealed to Violet. "I told her, but you already know Cattleya," for a second there was a smirk on his face, and then it was replaced by something else. "There is no reasoning with her when she gets the notion something is wrong. And I had to come and visit my Aunt Maud, she had been badgering for a visit for months, checking in on you seemed like the best option."
"Still, she said I was in danger." Violet remembered Cattleya refusing to let go of her arm. The Major encouraging her to eat, while Violet quickly kidnapped Claudia, getting the whole story since her friend flinched whenever she asked details about what had scared. "Am I in danger Claudia?"
Claudia leaned back more, his man bun rubbing against the gazebo's railing. "At first I believed her. Cattleya is not like this." Violet nodded, knowing it as true. "So, I had to come, and coming here only proved to me," he shook his head. "Proved to me that this must be something from her past."
"Her past?"
Claudia gave her a look. "Cattleya is extremely private person Violet." She already knew that. She knew that Claudia knew things about his lover that others would die to gossip about. She appreciated his loyalty and his discretion when it came to one of her dearest friends.
"You don't have to tell me about Cattleya's past." Violet quickly stopped him, not wanting him to regret saying anything. "She would have told me if it was important."
"You're right." Claudia agreed, hitting his head back on the rail, grumbling to finally say. "But I can tell you this, she went through a lot to get where she is, and sometimes those things stick with you."
"The burning." He had once told her, of the fire that dwelled in each of them now. "I remember you telling me that once. But now." It was different. "I believe you." Violet joined him, sitting on the bench next to him, sighing too. "It feels like a living thing always with you. It's presence, it's." How could she describe it, the fire that did not feel like fire? "It's cold and terrifying."
Now it was Claudia that was watching Violet, as if he was trying to figure something out. "Do you feel safe here Violet? You don't have to stay here, just because the Major is here."
"That isn't it."
"I know you made a few friends too." Yesterday, Claudia eyes had widened when he saw Luculia was living here and especially the maid Sophie that winked and hugged Violet as if she was her sister too. "That doesn't mean you can't come back with Cattleya and I today. Just say the word and I will take you back."
"Go back with you?" Violet felt nervous for a moment, it would be easy, to go back to the Company. Go back to writing, take another call to write a letter where there weren't assassinations and ghosts returning from death. She could have space to feel how she was truly feeling about the Major, and yet, she would be running. She knew one thing. She wasn't a coward. "I don't feel afraid staying here." Violet finally said, "I feel afraid for Cattleya."
"I know, I feel the same."
Someone interrupted. "What are you guys talking about?"
They were no longer alone at the gazebo.
"Sophie," Violet perked up, it was her who had snuck up the pathway of the gardens. There it was again, that look on her Sophie's face, as if she knew something they had yet to find out.
Violet had to ask. "You weren't listening in on us?" She saw something spark in the older woman's eyes. "You were." It was no longer a question.
"I didn't have to," Sophie remarked boldly. "I could hear you talking about nightmares and danger from my second story rooms." She had forgone the maid's outfit, wearing a cloak of pure black, and her steel eyes sagging with dark bags underneath them. She had been out last night.
"Of course, she was listening in Violet." Claudia grumbled. "Gil told me I would have to be careful around Miss Kenway." He said her name just as Dietfried's guards had once called her. "I just didn't know she was a spy as well as a convict."
"You would be surprised how similar those two are." Sophie surprised them both by leaning in towards them, and whispering so quietly they both had to lean in. "I would keep your voices down the next time, don't want the Dowager's spies or Dietfried's generals to hear what you guys are planning to do."
"The Dowager has spies?" Violet muttered.
"The generals have more." Sophie chuckled as she leaned on the gazebo's railing where Violet had once leaned on. "They would do anything for me to follow Violet back to the Company, or for Gil to follow as well, enemies play better on their grounds. You don't have to be a genius to know that."
"So, these enemies." Claudia brow furrowed, upset. "Mind telling us who they are?"
"If I knew their names, you would too." Sophie replied smartly. "And there are always enemies Claudia Hodgins, don't have to look so alarmed." She chuckled when Claudia crossed his arms. "But they aren't going to trouble you here or put a finger on your Company. It would give up their location, no we are safe from my reports. If Violet weathers the storm here for a bit with the Dowager and Duchess, you all will have nothing to fear," she repeated, as if she was tired of doing so. "And for the Leidenschaftlich generals, they're all old and boring. They won't be bothering you anytime soon."
Claudia grumbled. "How can you be so sure?"
Sophie's answer was a smile and turn of her heel towards the Summer Palace.
Claudia made a face at Sophie Kenway's retreat, even when she kept walking the way she had come in, a happy jump in her step as she left the gardens, as if they had been talking about Luculia's wedding rather than sharing secrets on these unknown enemies.
"Is she always like that?"
"Yes." Violet answered Claudia. "I'm afraid she is always like that."
"-great."
O0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0O
"I want you all to give a big welcome to Miss Violet Evergarden. She has come to us from the City of Leiden, the CH Postal Company, and works there as an Auto Memories Doll," Luculia introduced her to the class.
"It will be my pleasure to teach beside Miss Marlborough." Violet stood from her place beside Luculia's impressive mahogany desk. "And to help in any way that I can." Violet bowed before the class of fifty; the mass sum of the children here at the Seagrave Orphanage, and she just learned took up residence on the west wings of the Summer Palace. "I know that you may have many questions as to my capabilities and story as an Auto Memories Doll, and I will endeavor to answer them to the best of my abilities."
She got a few claps from the younger students, but those in their adolescence just stared up at her with glassy eyes. As if they had seen this all before.
"Well class." Luculia verbally urged them. "Now is the time that you can ask Miss Evergarden any questions before we go over the changes in your scheduling and lectures with the other professors."
That got their attention. At least six hands raised at the same time.
"Yes Benji," Luculia picked first.
"Is it true that Charlie saved you? That is what he has been telling everyone. Is he lying or not?"
"Benji." Luculia was swifter than Violet. "We talked about this."
"I know but you said we can ask her questions," answered the boy that looked near Charlie's age, having already been prepared for this response. "I know Charlie is lying he can't fight to save his life." There were a few chuckles.
"Class." Luculia gave a look that even had Violet regretting interrupting. "Like I said before, Charlie already explained to the class that whatever happens outside of class is private, and what do we say about private things."
"We respect each other's privacy." All of them said at once, and it made Violet smile when even the older ones chimed in.
Another hand was raised.
"Yes Greta, what is your question?" Luculia picked, this student a fair bit older.
"If I wanted to become Auto Memories Dolls, how could I go about that? What advanced level of schooling would we have to receive to get the license or certification?"
Violet was relieved that she knew this one. "Well, each Auto Memories Doll's journey is a different one, but if you are interested in getting certified as an Auto Memories Doll I can refer you to several different Auto Memories Doll training schools. The one Miss Marlborough and I attended is right here in Leiden, lead by Instructor Rhodanthe, I know that after the War there has been an increased need for girls that want to become Dolls."
"Thank you, Miss Evergarden." Greta answered, already scribbling down in her notebook.
"Okay next, we have Henry."
"Yes." This boy looked to be the oldest of the bunch. "When it comes to what we will be studying, do you require exercises such as repeating sentences, and-"
Violet found that they were mostly interested in how her place would change the structure of their lessons with Luculia, and the other two professors. She met them at the end of the class, and they had much to say about the changes in the schedules. These changes thankfully were made by Luculia and approved by the Dowager and Duchess as the two primary patrons and final voices when it came to the Orphanage. Her friend had been gracious to give her a training period so she would feel comfortable and supported with the requirements of her new position.
During their discussions, all three of the instructors, including Violet as the newest, took lunch in the staff room that had once been a tea parlor on the West side of the Summer Palace.
The other two professors were middle-aged and married to one another.
Mr. Roswell; the husband, was short, balding with plumb fingers, and paired with rosy cheeks that would rival a tomato. He was content to keep smiling in his button up shirt and nodding to the conversation going between his wife and Luculia about the opera shows in town. He taught history and the sciences, and that was all he could get out before his wife had demanded to know what Violet thought of the arts and music.
Mrs. Roswell put Sophie's rebellious tongue to shame. "Have you had the time to book a ticket to see the Chanticlare Singers, a whole male ensemble, they sing like angels, it is incredible the pieces they have created this year alone. I say, the new face of the arts and beauty. I hear that the Princess of Drossel even came to listen to them. Of course, you are already familiar with her, would you say that the Princess is an admirer of the Arts? I find that all royals all have a singular affinity to the Arts-"
Violet has yet to get a time to enter the conversation, the female professor of the arts and music had enough to say for all of them. Perhaps she could get Sophie to have a talk-off with Mrs. Roswell? How did the students even get a word in when she refused to stop speaking? Her mouth was like the constant hum of the car motor, always humming, until someone remembered to shut it off, and Violet was not sure if Luculia expected her to be the one to do that.
Luculia was only smiling, reading over the newspaper, as if she had just unburdened herself with Violet being here to take the brunt of conversations that went nowhere.
Violet was starting to regret her decision, when Mrs. Roswell was drowned out by a child's voice. "Miss Violet."
She turned and smiled brightly, "Charlie, you found me."
"Sorry I missed your class." He didn't look upset, he had that natural giddiness, jumping on his tippy toes to get closer to her, and that she liked. "Grandma Maude wanted me to say hello to father, Lucy, and Francis." She had wondered where he had been, and her smile grew as he explained. "Lucy wouldn't let me leave. She had wanted me to play games with Francis since now he can say words and even remembers people's faces."
"Lucy? Francis?"
"My little sister and brother," he sighed as if they were anchors around his neck rather than his siblings. "But I was supposed to give this earlier to you," he leaned in close to her ear so only she could hear and pressed a note into her gloved hand. "Uncle Gil said he wanted us to follow the map. He has a surprise for you."
At the mention of the Major she saved. "That's excellent news Charlie."
The questions about his little siblings would have to wait. Even Luculia's own questioning look would have to wait. Violet squeezed her hand under the table. Later.
Violet stood. "Excuse me Mr. and Mrs. Roswell, Luculia, I believe I am needed elsewhere."
"Yes, the Dowager is a very busy woman, no use wasting her time," Mrs. Roswell concluded must be the only reason for Violet leaving before they had finished their class preparations. "You be sure to tell us of any changes, we always have clear communication when it comes to the Dowager's expectations."
"Of course, enjoy your tea." Anyone that knew Miss Evergarden, knew her bright smile only meant one thing, and Luculia's wink urged her to walk faster with an explaining Charlie in tow.
Only one thing ran through her mind.
The Major had a surprise for her.
O0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0O
Charlie took her back to the field of flowers she had walked through the day before.
She was again struck how beautiful it was. Like a painting, but more. There was something so fragile and precious when it came to nature, something that drew her in, instinctive, like taking a breath. There had been so little time for enjoying it after the War, and she had found no use of it when she had grieved the Major. Now, she could take it in, and not have her mind elsewhere.
"Come on Violet, you have to go faster." Charlie led her on, but they went South rather than North, to where she had first seen the Major.
The headed right to the Blacksmith Hut where the Major lived, and the Forge itself that lay behind it closer to the coast.
This time there was twin chimneys running, and she had a few moments to finally appraise the Forge itself.
It was more like a cavernous barn, made up of timber and plaster, far larger than the Major's own living space. It might have seemed odd, but Violet could understand. Here was most likely where he spent most of his time. This was where the Major went to work and to perhaps get away from it all.
His haven away from the questions and the responsibility of remembering. Violet could respect that.
When the Doll walked through the open door, she was pulled in by the heat and warmth from the furnace of dancing flames. It was larger than any fireplace she had ever seen, raised to be waist high, and burning madly. She was glad it was contained within the actual forge that encased it, she feared the Major's Forge House would have caught fire if it didn't.
The furnace, she could imagine did its job well, welding and smelting the iron, ore, and the evidence of black ash that seemed to cling to the Major's welding blacksmith apron the last time she had laid eyes on it. Next to the furnace was several containers of liquid. Violet had heard once that blacksmith needed to cool the metal down to make proper steel, but perhaps those were questions best kept for the Major to answer.
Speaking of the Major.
"You came." He rounded the corner, out of breath, his hair up, and his eye focusing on what was in his hands, his dark leathered eye-patch seemed to glow by the fire. He was holding a blade that he then dunked into the container of liquid, turning his face away from the hissing and smoke that rose from it, and waiting for a moment until he noticed her watching.
"I've been trying to finish as fast as I can, but I still need to finish this one, and then another." He pulled the finished blade out and set it on a table where other blades already made lay in neat line.
"Nothing like getting the job done eh Violet." The green of his eye pulled her in once more. He was wearing a damp white shirt, it clung to his skin as he wiped the sweat from his brow, and with the blacksmith apron he completed the look of a capable Blacksmith.
She was relieved to see that his longer hair was pulled out of his face and combed back in a small ponytail much like Claudia's, she feared it catching fire after spotting the furnace, and at least he had thought of it too. Unfortunately, his hair was not nearly as long as it could be, because some raven blue pieces were beginning to fall into his face. It was a new look for him. Violet could not help but stare, "did I get something on my face?"
"No." Violet answered quickly, and then his smile mirrored her own. "You're fine." More than fine. She reminded him, waving the small piece of paper Charlie had given her before he had disappeared. He was no longer in the Hut, nor at the door, and she knew he had run back. The little rascal. "Charlie jut got me, he said you had a surprise to show me?"
"Let me finish up here." He signaled to the welding and what he had moments ago been doing, "and then we'll go?"
"Okay," Violet awkwardly bowed and grew flustered at his growing smile.
Stepping outside she was instantly relieved by the open air. She felt better outside, she breathed in gulps of the soothing sea air, but even outside she could still hear the Major hammering away at whatever it was he was now doing, and all the while she was trying to forget how much muscle and focus there was in his movements when he was working.
"He knows what he's doing." Violet mumbled to herself, walking closer to the sea cliff's edge, her dress blowing, and smartly keeping her back to the Forge before she pretended to be a gulping fish again. What had happened to me? She had clamed up like a shell, watching him, and painfully remembering how at ill at ease he had been at War. The comparison from then and now was shocking. In her memory he was always seemed to have the weight of something on his shoulders, in his eye, within the words he shared with her, and now… he moved effortlessly.
"Did Luculia introduce you to the kids?"
Violet turned just in time to see the Major dunk his hands in the water barrel outside the Forge, wetting his arms and chest, his white shirt clinging ridiculously now that she could see every muscle, even the ones on his stomach, an then he had a rag and he was rubbing his hair roughly, and then staring at her knowingly, as he rubbed his hair until it was a cute wet mop around hiding his ears and the top of his neck. "Was it that bad?"
Violet stopped staring at him, it helped some, the sea so beautiful to not look at. "No, it was great, I met the students, and the other professors, and Luculia was very kind to give me a training period before I am on my own."
"You deserve it."
She disagreed. "I was very lucky to have got it."
He frowned, throwing the rag next to the barrel, and walking up to her. "You should have expected the training, be sure to tell me or anyone if you feel like your being overwhelmed. I don't want you keeping it to yourself if you feel like you are given too much."
"I will speak about that to my superiors, and when it is appropriate." Violet said right back, not liking what he implied. "I am more than capable of doing what is asked of me." Perhaps even more so, but she would not go that far, it was after all her first day.
"That's not what I meant."
"Then speak plainly."
"I wanted that for myself," he continued quietly, relaxing his position beside her. "I thought myself unworthy of telling others how much their questions hurt me, how it was too much for me to deal with. How I could not be the person they expected me to be. When I first came, I wanted everyone's happiness rather than my own." Suddenly it was like yesterday and they were transported back to yesterday sitting on that driftwood. "I returned to my home and I couldn't be the person that they loved."
She listened patiently.
"The person that returned was one that was fine with killing to survive, was even good at it, knew only about living in the moment, for the next meal, the next fight, and for the longest time it was the only thing I thought I was capable of doing. My time in the enemies' camps only made it worse."
He seemed to go into a trance, shutting his eye and refusing to open it.
Violet moved without thinking. Miraculously, her hand was not trembling as she held his shoulder and shook it. "Look at me, Major," she ordered, infusing her voice with strength and calm she most certainly was not feeling. The electric charge of skin-to-skin contact finally forced his eyes to open. They focused on hers wild and bewildered.
"You are a good person," she told him, careful to avoid the talk of killing, even when she did not know all the details. "You know what you did was wrong. We can't undo the things we have done. We can only stand together and fight when the memories come."
"Fight." He gazed over the cliff her hand dropping. He stared off at the distant waves that crashed on the sand far below them. It was like he was talking to the surf now, as if he had forgotten that Violet stood beside him.
"When they took me, they stripped me of all my clothes, shaved every piece of hair from my body, and made me run around the barracks for hours in the cold." This was it. This was the story he did not get to tell yesterday. Now he had Violet's full attention. "I ran faster when their dogs began chasing us, but their laughing was everywhere, they were wrapped in fur and scarves, and we were freezing. What made it worse was there were other men beside me, men that knew me, called for me to help them, and I left them when they fell of exhaustion, and did not return when the dogs shredded them to pieces."
"Oh Major." As Violet tensed to properly herself towards him, his breath caught, turning his face towards her, his eye clenched shut and tears shimmering on his impossibly long lashes, and even some leaked from the eye-patch, which he turned to wipe where she could not see.
"I have to finish." He choked out, even the step away from her meant so much, "now that I started."
She let him.
"I once had to fight a man for bowel of soup. He fell backwards and his head cracked on the cement pavement a floor down from us. I didn't have to fight him, but I did. Later I found out it wasn't even for him, but for his dying father. I killed two men there."
The story seemed to really get to him, and Violet wished that at least someone had been there to provide him comfort, she did not care whom, but no one deserved to suffer alone.
"There were different duties at the camps, and when I found a position that didn't mean I had to work in the fields or the mines I took it. Do you want to know what it was for?"
In that very second Violet couldn't breathe.
"It was collecting the dead from the barracks, the ones that didn't wake up. Then collecting the ones that fell as they worked from the winter cold or from the fumes of the mines, I carried their bodies and then laid them in the incinerator. They didn't even get the respect of having a burial. That was what we were worth to them, and that is what I chose to do rather than dying like an honorable Major."
"All I had in my mind was your face, and I refused to stop. I refused to die." There was a bitterness to his story now. "I took the first chance they gave me. I became their fighter." Violet didn't have to ask what that was. "I fought in an arena every night for them. Fighting until the other man was dead," he lifted his shirt and for the first time she saw his arms, they had scars, bite marks, raised puckered places were his skin must have been burned. She reached out to them.
Her fingers traced, and she feared of how far and deep the others he carried on the places she had yet to see.
"There are more Violet."
She raised his abused arm to her face and kissed where someone had burned him.
He looked shattered, lost, utterly alone. "That is why I could not tell them Violet." She caught his muffled question. "You understand me don't you Violet, why I can't speak about it? Not to anyone?"
In that very moment Violet's mind screamed in anguish. She was careful what showed on her face. She wanted to hurt those men the way they had hurt the Major, and at the same time comfort him for every memory he had bottled up inside him. "I understand."
At the root of it all, his past didn't change the way she felt about it, it only enhanced it. She needed him. He needed her. There was nothing else beyond that. "I'm not going anywhere."
"That's just it." He was talking again. "This new life has made me weak. I could not protect you from those men, the same way I can't protect anyone here. I can't fight off the people that want me dead, and this stalemate the Duchess has made won't last forever."
He reached out to take Violet's face in his hands. "Yet I can't go back to the killer I was. I won't. I have sworn off that life. For my mother, for Dietfried, and you I promised to never kill again." He dropped his hands, scratching into his hand as if the pain would make it easier to keep talking, to keep unburdening these thoughts that had been tormenting him. "The only way I can think of stopping them from following me and coming here is I take away what they want most. If I am dead, he will have no reason to come here. Charlie, Sophie, the Duchess, the children… you… will all be safe."
He took a single tentative step back towards her. "Help me Violet," he pleaded. "Help me make everyone safe."
Violet understood exactly what he meant. Fury exploded over her body, burning, white-fury powerful to bring down a tank or level an entire city.
"You selfish, self-pitying vile creature," she seethed. "You come here. You practically let everyone know you are here. You make everyone care about you. You make Cattleya and Luculia love you. You turn my life upside down."
She was shouting at the top of her lungs now, her voice completely overpowering the pounding surf. The Major looked at her like a hooked fish on the bottom of a boat. Her rant reached critical maximum capacity and yet she could not stop even if she wanted to.
"And you think I am going to help everyone by killing you?" Violet howled hoarsely, her throat burning from the sheer volume. "You know what I take back what I said about you being a good person. You are a coward. A lousy, selfish coward…"
Violet knew she had gone too far, crossed over some imaginary line. He had opened himself to her completely, and this was her response, "you can forget me keeping this to myself. You need a stern talk from Dietfried. Perhaps even your mother." The second that word was out of her mouth, she saw the change.
Instantly, his glorious, tortured eye turned diamond hard. Rage boiled on his angel's face. He covered the short distance between them with a single step, latched his strong hands around her upper arms, and jerked her against his body. His mouth slammed down on hers.
She had never had anyone force a kiss on her before. Violet had never been kissed. Some would believe it would make her more furious than before. It did not.
This was the Major. Disoriented with desire, she buried her fingers in his hair, deliciously soft hair, just as she had fantasized doing for years. His lips were not gentle, and his hands gripped her tightly that it hurt. That's going to leave a mark, she thought hazily.
Her body vibrated with lust, molding along the length of his muscled form so closely she didn't know where her skin left off and his began. His tongue swept inside her mouth, leading hers into a maddening duel that left her yearning for more. Violet moaned in his mouth. The sound made him wilder and more aggressive. One of his hands came up to tangle in the hair at her nape while the other moved south. When his hand flexed and pressed her forward, she felt the hard proof of his desire throbbing against her abdomen.
It was like a bucket of cold water. In that moment Violet knew what he needed and wanted were two separate things. Violet's body raged with her to not go through with it.
Her mind won. Pushing weakly against his shoulders, she turned her head away, moving her lips away from his reach. He ignored the hint. His hot mouth roved down her jawline. Violet had to move now, or she never would.
She tore herself from his arms and it was like plunging into an ice bath.
The Major was obviously not himself. He gasped rapidly, raggedly, his green eye dark and hooded with hunger. He reached for her as if he would draw her back into her arms. Violet took a step back.
"We need to stop," she said, her voice shaking badly. They had been deprived for so long, she knew this. But something in the back of her mind told her this was not the way it was supposed to be. Life was not so planned, something like this could never be planned… or expected.
"Why, why should we deny ourselves?" So, he had not been so blind to her change in character as she first thought.
"We need to stop." She repeated to him and herself.
Anger replaced the lust in his eyes. "Why?" He ground his teeth. "You want me, and I want you. If we are going to die why deny what we both desire?"
Guess this was him saying he wanted to stop playing the "Violet is still a little girl" game. Thank Goodness. She was not sure they could go back to pretending they did not share a mutual attraction, not after this. But Violet was sure she did not want to move forward either. Something inside her told her the Major didn't either, and she would not let anyone force their relationship to progress unless it was them.
"We're not going to die," Violet put two more spaces between them. "But I will say this Major, I do love you, very much." She grinned when he did but put a hand up when he took a step forward. "But I hate that I must be the one says this, but neither of us is ready for this. This is definitely not the right place nor time."
"Forgive me, you're right. I should not have." The Major was returning to his senses. Breaking the physical contact had helped clear his head too.
She didn't like the look he gave her. Like that time Iris has broken down talking about her lost love. Jilted. That was the opposite of how she wanted him to feel.
"I am not saying no." Violet blushed deeply again. "Just not yet."
His grin grew to epic proportions.
"But 'not yet' is going to become 'not on your life' if you ever bring up the idea of suicide again? Do you understand me?"
When he nodded, Violet turned to leave the beach and lead him home.
He followed her silently back, and she smiled to herself.
She just might be the key to keeping him alive.
O0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0O
That night, Dinner was more guests that Violet first expected.
The children; Charlie, Lucy, and Francis, had been sent to their own dinner, and the three strangers seemed eager to see the Dowager and Duchess, and their wide assortment of guests.
"This is my husband, the Duke." The Duchess extended her hand to a bright red-bearded man sitting beside her at the dinning table. He had an impressive mustache, curled and burgundy, and it reminded Violet of one of those exotic red birds. He was not lazy in the least bit though, getting up quickly to get his wife a plate of food himself, refused to be served by the staff, and was talking quickly to the beaming Dowager, his mother, about some late news on the railroad business and a new type of locomotive him and his cousin Ashely had invented. Violet could see where Charlie got his energy from.
Still, it begged the question. Where did Charlie get his looks? She dared not look in the Majors direction.
Life seemed to be complicated enough for her.
"Ashley is brilliant. Who would have thought that adding another wheel would have such a great effect? His mind is a pool I will dive in my dear," he kissed the Duchess' hand, his beard tickled her hand but she showed no sign but downright admiration for him. Violet had never seen her shine so brightly. "I can assure you we will have more projects finished this year than any year before."
"I do hope so my love."
"Yes, yes Ashley this, Ashley that, we all love hearing about the darling Ashley," a dashing young man with the same dark auburn hair said. His hair was wavy, and it was parted in half, slicked to the sides as if someone had licked their hands and forced the hair to stay in place. He did not have a stitch of hair on his clean-shaven face, boyish did not fit him, but spoiled did. "Why give Ashley all the credit he isn't even here." To the displeasure of the Duchess who pouted at the news. "Why can't we talk about my Darla? She is the actress here after all."
His female companion beside him paused and dipped her head. The actress had shorter hair than even him and slicked to her skull in the same way that made Violet think was all the rage from where she was from. She winked at him returning to her conversation with Mrs. Roswell who would not leave her be, and neither would her Mr. Roswell. It was easy to see why the instructors were besotted with her. She looked like the way a bald eagle would look, majestic and frightening all at once, and she had met the Chanticleer Singers.
Luculia was absent.
She had taken a private dinner with her fiancée.
Violet could not blame her.
"Leslie Hodgins," the Duchess pleaded for the tenth time to the spoiled looking man, before he gave another reason why General Ludlow funded his textile export and sought him for his expertise in the business. "What did your mother tell you? Jealousy doesn't suit you cousin."
"As if I would be jealous of Ashley, huh, it was Claudia that was always jealous of him. Didn't Ashley steal his girl after all?"
"I was ten years old." Claudia piped up for the record.
"I'm sure that was the only reason why she said no to marriage." Leslie raised a chalice to Claudia.
There was a round of chuckles and a very steamy Cattleya that refused to meet the Duchess' triumphant smile. Those two were going to get into some hot water if they kept mauling each other with their eyes. Meanwhile, Claudia sunk deeper in his chair, it seemed he had gotten smaller as the meal continued.
"I am tired. I think I'll go to our room," Cattleya gave her a small smile before asking to be excused from the meal.
Violet was sad to see her go, but then Claudia said that he was tired too and then he too left. He was probably trailing after her, and she guessed it was for the best. Cattleya had said she always admired Claudia for making her feel at home no matter where they were. Perhaps she would come to her room and it would be empty. She hoped so.
She hoped they could sort out what was bothering them, and as their friend she wanted to go to check, but she was never one to leave a man behind.
The Major sat like a statue in his seat. From her peripheral vision she could see him eating, and she decided that after today she would only leave to her room when he did to his.
As for the one that made the upsetting comment. If Leslie had not mentioned Claudia, Violet would not have seen the resemblance, but now, there was no mistaking it. Leslie was Claudia's brother, older brother, and Violet would not outright say it, but she preferred her Hodgins' employer over all his older brothers, no matter what anyone said.
She was beginning to see that out of the three, Leslie would cause the most headaches.
Good thing she only had to have dinner with him. Violet decided to focus on cutting her steak and took a bite with excessive chewing. Her eyes once again found the Major's as he bit into his own meal, and he gave her a roguish smile that almost made her spit out her champagne when she took a sip.
Stop it. She mouthed to him.
He just shook his head in mock defeat. The fiend.
"Now that I got you both together." The Duchess waved her hand in Violet's direction, stealing the attention of the table. "Did you know Darla is going to be in the opera with Irma Fliech in the upcoming show?"
"Who is Irma Fliech my darling?"
"Husband, you embarrass our guest." She playfully hit her husband's chest. "Irma and Darla are the closest of friends. Did you know Violet was the Auto Memories Doll that helped the famous singer?"
"I did not know." Darla spoke up. She had a heavy accent, but an encouraging smile. "I am indebted to you Violet. Ask anything of me and I will see what I can do."
"That is very kind of you."
"Ah, Ah! I know where I've heard of you now!" Leslie waved a finger at Violet. "You're the soldier girl that fought the enemy. The Maiden of some sort yes? Yes, I always wondered why they called you a Maiden is it because you were a little girl or was it because-"
"Shut up Lez." Completely stopped the conversation. "Here's a thought, try to think before you speak next time." It wasn't the Duchess that said that, it was the Major.
"I didn't mean anything by it Gil. It was just a joke. Can't you take a little joke?"
"Did you not hear me?" The Major gritted his teeth, but this time Violet felt it was more than just Leslie. "How you like to hear yourself talk. You're ruining everyone's evening, and I'm losing my patience." Violet had not expected him to continue, and she was just about to step in before it got ugly when someone else entered.
"Is Leslie asking for another sucker punch? I dare say, he was like that at the gala, and I distinctly remember it ended quite badly."
The Dowager opened her arms, "Augustus! My boy!"
Violet swiveled in her seat, only because everyone else did, and she was not disappointed at the newest guest to arrive. While the actress had been stunning to look at. Violet found her mouth falling open, there stood the most glamorous man she had ever seen, and she was not sure what part of him to see first. He had full lips, a strong jaw, and dark coal eyes underneath dark amber brows.
"Mother." The Dowager embraced him, he was dressed in a white replica of Captain Dietfried's uniform, a naval man, but where Dietfried wore it with disdain and brutal attitude, this man was uselessly pretty, the relaxed type, and who seemed to care about nothing because he had that much power or that much ego. He had dimples when he smiled, and his mother made a show of kissing one.
"You didn't tell me you were coming?" The Dowager patted his chest, fixing his naval uniform.
"And miss your pretty smile when I made my entrance." His disastrous smile roved over them all. "And give no entertainment for your guests."
"You didn't say Gus Veridiche was coming," Darla piped up from beside Leslie, her eyes wide and doll-eyed. "We have to meet him."
"It would give me no greater pleasure, you beautiful creature. Welcome to my home," Gus Veridiche sweeped across the room and kissed the actress' hand, almost making the woman swoon, and then he caught Violet watching and winked at her as he laid the kiss.
"Sit down before you hurt yourself." The Major bit out.
"Calm down Major Pirate Sir," Gus saluted him playfully, and went to do just that. "I am your superior now, and my mother's guest the last time I checked."
"Boys behave." The Dowager reminded them, but Violet could sense she was having the time of her life having both sons at the Summer Palace, and the Major no longer in his catatonic shell, and speaking out more now than he had any of the previous nights. It looked like for the Dowager Christmas had come early this year.
"Are you going to say hello to your sister Augustus?" This time it was the Duke, whom had grown incredibly quiet at his brother's appearance. It did not even explain what happened to the Duchess. All the mirth and light she had leaked out of her was gone. She was more ghost now, her hands on her lap, and her eyes glued to her food.
"Forgive me." Gus addressed his brother less calmly than Violet would guess he would. As for brothers they did not act like it. The Duke looked just as murderous as the Major had during Leslie's comment about her being the "Leidenschaftlich's Soldier Maiden."
"Address her Augustus."
For a moment Violet doubted the lovely man would.
But then he looked directly at the Duchess, even when she would not meet his gaze. "Forgive me Duchess, motherhood becomes you."
Violet had not expected Duchess Melanie to immediately jump out of her seat, swiveling out of her husband's grasping hand, and storming out of the room before anyone can call her back.
"Oops." Gus picked up an apple and took a bite out of it.
"You're the devil Augustus."
"You told me to talk to her." He chewed rapidly, and apparently not interested in making more of a scene now that the Duchess was gone. "This is not my fault."
They glared at one another, but Gus relented, eating his apple until there was only the core left. Violet was grateful the Major didn't get in the middle of that argument. She was not in the mood to drag him away from the table when there was already a mysterious battle going on between the Duke and his possibly ungallant younger brother.
The Dowager began cocking her head and tsking away instead of addressing the surprised table, and her feuding sons.
"Well," Leslie whistled. "Way to make an entrance Augustus."
The Duke was the one to dismiss Leslie from the table.
A/N: I'M BACK! (cowers behind hands, peeks through fingers.) I'M SORRY MY WONDERFUL FOLLOWERS! I like to believe my answer is what Noctus Fury told me, when life calls, you answer, am I right? I hope this chapter reeled you back in. I am here to stay guys! I promise, this story will be finished, and can I just say HAPPY ANNIVERSARY to this story! Wow, a year went by when I finished the TV show series for Violet Evergarden, and we are still waiting for this inspiring next season. I don't want to sound like a grumpy teenager when I have kept you guys waiting like this. For the record, I am just as bad. I am so thankful to have you guys have kept supporting, loving, and reviewing to tell me what you guys think. It means the world to me! May you get all the things you wanted this summer and hopefully news on Season 2 for our love of this fandom.
SPECIAL SHOUT-OUT TO:
KennaScripts: I hope this makes you smile, because I smile every time you leave a review. Thank you so much, and I hope this answered a bit of your questions and gave you more to think about. Feel free to reach out for anything when it comes to this story, or just in general you give me so much positive esteem to keep this story going!
Leidenschaftlich: When I saw your review I could not stop showing it to my little sister. It is so inspiring what you did creating an account just to review and get notifications. It just shows how powerful reviews and support can really be and I appreciate you so much! I hope the creators make the Season 2 better than my story honestly, these two deserve the best love story. I just feel so empowered about love, sacrifice, and friendship when I watch the series, I want that to carry over for the next season. I hope this chapter was to your liking, have a wonderful day.
yubima-chan: You win the Award for Most Faithful Reviewer! I agree I didnt' like when the Major said that either, but these characters have minds of their own. Hope you liked this chapter, look forward to what you think and want for this story! Hope you are doing great!
loveajh4ever (Doll Reader): I completely agree with you. I want this fandom to never die. Thank you for your review!
Hatter1999: I am so sorry if the wait has been terrible! I appreciate your review, and hope this chapter was satisfying! Best regards!
DaddysLiitleGirl: Thank you so much for the review, I feel so excited for what they have in store for Season 2 too!
atalanta108: I feel the conflict in you! Leon vs. Gilbert, there is great darkness in choosing one or the other. Sorry, I just watched Star Wars and to be serious now I feel the exact same way. I love them both, if it was me I would love them both up, and I was playing that thought too. I would love to see Leon see Violet again, I was always a fan of them! Hope you liked this chapter, tell me what you think, and thank you for reviewing!
Guest #1: Your wish is my command! I hope you liked this chapter, thanks for reviewing!
casedeputy: Thank you for your appreciation of my story, hope you liked this chapter, and thank you so much for taking the time to review even when it took me forever to update! You rock!
YAYYYY! There... it is finished... I am going to go to sleep now, look forward to updating, much faster than the last.
I have no excuses now ;)
All my love,
Odeveca
