It's the one-year anniversary of when I started posting this fic on AO3, which is also when I started posting there overall.

When Thor arrives in Heimdall's dome via the Bifrost, the gatekeeper gives the customary bow with a fist clenched over his heart and a deep murmur of "My prince". Thor notices that Heimdall looks much less stiff than usual.

"You must thank the Man of Iron for those spa vouchers on my behalf." Heimdall tells Thor once formalities are over. "It was quite a relaxing respite from standing here all day. Like Valhalla, almost, with the things their massages did to even my muscles." It's not unusual for the gatekeepers eyes to seem to be looking far away, since he can see all over the Nine Realms, but it seems more like he's reminiscing.

"Spas are very relaxing." Thor agrees. Tony had arranged for him to go once, in the Tower of Stark, although Thor isn't sure how much Tony actually uses the spa in his own tower.

"I was rebuked rather sternly but almost pityingly by my masseur for being that tense." Heimdall says, and Thor lets out a usual booming laugh. Heimdall should have spa vouchers more often, he decides.

Still, he's not here for idle conversation, and one thing has been weighing heavily on Thor's mind.

"Where did Sleipnir come from? You said he was Loki's, that Loki birthed him.." Thor still almost wonders if the gatekeeper was joking about that, but Heimdall is so stoic and serious all the time, and Thor outranks him as prince.

"Aye, Loki birthed him." Heimdall's voice and face are neutral as Thor's always seen them, but he thinks there's a bit of a disgusted tone to Heimdall's voice or posture.

"How?" Thor says slowly, still unable to really wrap his head around the concept, because that's just not something men do.

There's a bit of a pause, and for a brief moment, Thor almost thinks Heimdall is going to start telling him about how children are conceived.

"It started when the wall around Asgard was under construction." The gatekeeper answers.

Thor nods, not really understanding, but his stomach plummets in anticipation of whatever new horror story is about to unfold.

The wall around Asgard- which was built several centuries ago when Thor was an adolescent instead of a young man- has even fallen into the Midgardian stories of Asgard. Granted, they'd sort of spread it around on a trip to Midgard, but it's probably been warped some over the centuries.

Odin had made a wager with the giant smith who was building the wall for them. The smith had to finish constructing the wall in just one winter, which should have been impossible, as he'd asked for three seasons to complete it.

Thor still has no idea how Freya's hand in marriage had ended up being part of the bet, but that had indeed happened, much to Freya's displeasure. Somehow the Midgardian myths have also thrown in wagering the sun and the moon, as if that is even possible.

Yet, the smith had almost finished the wall in just that one winter. His horse, Svadilfari, had been incredibly strong, hauling heavy stones by himself and doing most of the work for the smith.

"What does the wall have to do with Sleipnir or Loki?" Thor asks, confused.

"Odin magically turned Loki into a mare to distract Svadilfari." Heimdall informs him, and Thor's mind reels.

He thought Heimdall had perhaps been a bit mad when he said Loki had birthed Sleipnir. After all, how would a man give birth to a horse, as Tony had immediately pointed out during their conversation earlier. It's not like Thor hadn't been thinking exactly the same thing.

"He can do that?" Thor asks, even though he really doesn't want to think about how that would be possible. He especially doesn't want to think that Odin would do that.

It's still hard to imagine his father doing magic when he'd been so adamantly against the idea of men and boys doing magic for almost as long as Thor can remember. Of course Loki was the first male Thor had ever heard of using magic.

Then again, can't magic do anything? He'd seen Loki turn invisible several times over their lives (which made it easier to catch him if he knew where he started out), and Loki had appeared as another Tony Stark one time recently when Thor visited Midgard. So why couldn't magic be used to turn oneself or another into an animal?

"He should not have. Loki was still a boy." Heimdall fumes. Thor thinks back to the time. Loki had to have been at least a young adolescent.

"Odin let Svadalfari force himself upon Loki?" Thor asks, stomach churning at the thought.

In some ways, though, it's not all too different from when Asgardians use the slaves for their own pleasure, although now Thor thinks such an act is horrendous. Thor never forced himself on a slave. As prince, he had a great deal of willing partners and never needed an unwilling one.

Yet he knows some guards will drag slaves into secluded rooms, and have their way with them, and the slaves can do nothing to resist.

Yet, as far as Thor knows, no Asgardian would ever do that to a Jotun. At least Loki was spared that. And as Heimdall said, Loki was barely more than a child.

It's horribly wrong. Even though most of Asgard does not view slavery or forcing oneself on slaves as wrong in the same way Midgard does, the two realms at least share a hatred of people who force children to perform sexual acts.

Heimdall nods solemnly. "Aye. He thought Loki would provide a great distraction for the smith's stallion in the form of a mare. It worked."

"And Loki was impregnated?" Thor's eyes are wide.

He had of course noticed that he hadn't seen Loki in months, but for a while he had simply assumed that Loki had gotten better at avoiding him. The palace is very large, after all, and Loki would not have voluntarily gone near the training grounds where Thor spent much of his time. Thor had been busy with his own life, with boring lessons and more exciting sparring sessions with his friends.

Had Loki actually been a horse all that time? A female, pregnant horse? It makes sense, in a horrible way.

Thor finds this recent tale of Odin's atrocities just as horrifying as when Odin had left Sleipnir to rot in the dungeon, or when he'd sewn Loki's mouth shut, although Thor hadn't found that last one as horrifying at the time, which sickens him now.

The fact that such a strong horse had been reduced to Sleipnir's current condition greatly angers Thor. He'd always made sure his own horses were treated like royalty (they belonged to royalty, after all). He of course would have been furious if any horse was as maltreated as Sleipnir was, but Sleipnir being smarter makes it even worse.

This is making Thor all the more uncomfortable with the fact that, for most of his life, he'd viewed Loki as less than an animal. Loki was a thing to him, a thing he could take out his frustrations on whenever he wanted. Like a living training dummy he could bash just because he felt like it.

Suddenly being turned into an opposite-sex horse would be frightening enough, and then to add being impregnated- no, raped, on top of that... Thor can't even begin to fathom what that must have been like for Loki. And Odin had made it happen without care, just to prevent the smith from fulfilling his end of the bargain.

That alone could have messed with anybody's mind (Thor knows that all his fellow Avengers have been affected mentally by things in their pasts, and none of them are at all weak in Thor's opinion).

On top of that extremely traumatizing time, Loki had been routinely abused for much of his life. It would be impossible for him to not have mental scars because of how they'd treated him, and he undoubtedly suffered physical head injuries as well. A great deal of those injuries were Thor's fault.

"Where was he?"

"He was mostly in the Queen's stables and field." Heimdall answers, clearly thinking it is a good thing that Loki was in Frigga's stables instead of Odin's.

Something Thor hadn't really remembered until now surfaces in his head. He remembers a black mare, obviously pregnant at the time, with shocking green eyes for a horse. The mare had shied away from him when he approached it, and once cornered, had lashed out, driving him back with flying hoofs.

Thor had never considered that that mare was Loki, even though it had the same shade of green eyes. Of course he hadn't- who would have guessed he had been turned into a horse.

Loki, by that time, was usually resigned to his fate when Thor decided to pick on him, even if he still had his silver tongue to throw remarks Thor's way. They'd long since taught him that fighting back only made things worse for him, but just like how Loki had stood up to Thor at Xavier's School, he became a lot more fierce when protecting one he loved.

Loki had undoubtedly been worried that Thor would hurt the baby growing inside him... her? Loki the mare hadn't let Thor get near.

Thor now has the answer to where Loki had been when he was gone. It's worse than he imagined, and at one point he thought Odin had returned Loki to Jotunheim, or killed him.

Loki had changed a bit after he came back, demanding to know where 'he' was. It hits Thor hard, that that question had been a mother trying to find her baby. It's the same way Frigga would have reacted if Thor had gone missing, but then Loki had just... stopped.

He'd looked extremely lost and confused after that, wandering around as if in a daze.

When Thor and his friends demanded to know where he'd been all those months, Loki looked even more lost and confused, as if he hadn't realized he'd been anywhere.

And then, a while later, he'd started talking to someone who wasn't there, and everyone thought him mad.

It had been that time after Loki was trying to get Thor to help him, that he'd changed the most. Loki barely spoke a word for years. It seemed as if Loki was not mentally present- in fact, he seemed far from it. But had that really been Loki's fault? Thor's starting to think not.

He thought Loki's sharp tongue had all but disappeared over the years as he acted more and more cowardly. At one point, Loki never cried, but then he'd started to, again. Really, Loki being damaged badly should have been Thor's cue to start standing up for him, or at least to stop harassing him. But he had only teased Loki more, for being even stupider.

Thor shakes his head. The past, as bad as it was, is the past. He's made a vow to protect Loki (and his friends) now, and he will. It won't make up for what he's done, nothing will, but it's the right thing to do.

It had been rather odd when Loki threatened Thor in Professor Xavier's mutant school on Midgard. Not that Loki hadn't stood up to them before. He had, and apparently they hadn't totally beat the fight out of him, even after all these years. He'd actually hit Thor with Jotun ice, and Thor has a feeling Loki would do it again in a heartbeat. For centuries, he never would have dared do that.

"The Man of Iron inquired if Odin tried to make Sleipnir his steed."

"Aye." Heimdall confirms. "Sleipnir was the fastest, smartest, most powerful horse in all the Nine."

"Do you jest? He was thefastest and strongest in all the Nine? He does seem quite intelligent for a horse, but he is not strong..." Thor trails off, feeling stupid. The lower dungeons would leave even Thor emaciated and frail. Sleipnir being in poor shape now is undoubtedly a result of that.

"He was much much stronger then than he is now." Heimdall answers almost sadly.

"So Sleipnir was a magnificent horse, and Odin tried to ride him?" Thor asks, shaking his head slightly to get back on topic.

"Sleipnir refused to let Odin ride him, and fought him constantly, often winning." Heimdall continues. Thor can certainly believe that. Sleipnir had shown the same fighting spirit even when Thor was caring for him in Puente Antiguo, and at Xavier's School.

"So Father banished him to the dungeon for not submitting to being his steed." Thor growls, clenching a fist around Mjolnir's handle. Thunder crashes, and he quickly tries to reign in his temper. It won't do for all of Asgard to know he's angry about something.

Surely letting Odin ride him would be preferable to wasting away in the dark and filth, yet from how Sleipnir had acted towards Thor, the horse hadn't regretted bucking or kicking Odin. Or does Sleipnir even remember Odin riding him?

"Did you know that the serpent... Jormungand- was on Midgard, and real?" Thor asks. It wasn't as hard to learn that as when he'd discovered Sleipnir's reality in the dungeons, but it is slightly odd to think that nobody noticed the snake was more than a charmed necklace until today.

"I do not turn my gaze on Midgard often." Heimdall answers cryptically, and Thor's going to take that as a no. "I knew there was a giant serpent who could circle all of Midgard, but I did not know he was connected to Loki in any way until they found each other."

"Was Loki his mother, too?" Thor asks, remembering Loki described them as his Monster Family. Had he been turned into a snake and a wolf as well?

"I know not how the others came to be." Heimdall answers.

Thor's actually kind of glad. Yes, he'd asked, but in retrospect he's not sure he wants to know. Sleipnir's origin was bad enough. What if the others' are even worse? What further atrocities could his father have committed?

"Yet you know where they are?" Thor asks hopefully. Well, three of them are already accounted for. Hadn't Heimdall said earlier that Hel did indeed rule over Helheim? So it's only Fenrir who is unaccounted for.

Thor really hopes the wolf isn't suffering as much as Sleipnir had been, although he really wouldn't be surprised if he was.

"He was in the dungeons once, was he not?" Thor asks, but if Heimdall had known this, wouldn't he have said something earlier?

"I know not."

Thor recalls Tyr's tales of losing his hand to a huge wolf, who must have been Fenrir. Loki had demanded to know what happened to the wolf, but then Odin summoned him, and he'd stopped asking afterwards.

Thor gets the sinking suspicion that, like when he'd stopped asking where Sleipnir was, Odin had done something to Loki's mind.

"Do you know where Fenrir is now? I plan on getting him to Loki, as I did with Sleipnir." Thor says. "Tony Stark told me that he is in a cave." It's a good thing Thor remembered to say that.

"That is useful." Heimdall's golden eyes stare at some part of some realm that Thor cannot see. "How did the Man of Iron know this?"

"Fenrir told him." Thor says, and then realizes he should probably elaborate. "It seems he can communicate with Loki, even across vast distances. Sleipnir could, too."

"That requires a great deal of power." Heimdall muses.

"Where is he?" Thor asks, somewhat impatiently.

"I've been searching Midgard, but even that takes quite a while. I've determined he is not on the continent of Africa."

Since Jormungand was on Midgard, perhaps Fenrir is too? That probably wouldn't be as bad as some other places, except Tony said that Fenrir reported being chained up in the cave.

"Has Odin realized Sleipnir is no longer in the dungeons?" Thor hopes the answer is no. If he does know, will he try to go to Midgard and take Sleipnir back? What would he even do? Put him back in that terrible dungeon?

Thor isn't going to let his father get his hands back on the poor horse again. Thor will fight his father himself if he has to.

"The Allfather has been busy with other matters." Heimdall says, and his face doesn't change, but Thor swears there's satisfaction in the man's golden, all-seeing eyes. "I believe you already saw how people were reacting to the news you let slip."

Right. Thor had accidentally revealed to his closest friends that Odin is a magic-user, and of course the word had spread around the realm. Perhaps there have even been some attempted usurpations.

After all, most Aesir hadn't been impressed or pleased when they found out. Odin had deceived everyone about it for over a millennia. Thor has a feeling that not even Odin's status as Allfather had changed many people's minds about male-magic users any more than Loki had. After all, until recently, Thor had held the same view about men who used magic not being real men, that the were pathetic and cowardly.

It's still hard to believe that Odin is capable of seidr when he always told Thor that men don't use magic. Men don't use magic in Asgard, except for Loki and, apparently, the Allfather himself. Why had Odin punished and berated Loki severely for doing what he himself was capable of in secret?

Still, even though people are certainly displeased with Odin, Thor seriously doubts his father is getting beaten or whipped for using magic like Loki had been by Odin himself. Nobody's venting their general frustrations on Odin, either, although countless Aesir (including Thor) took out their displeasure on Loki, even when Loki was a small child, less than half the size of Odin or the Einherjar.

Thor realizes he never truly knew his father, any more than he really knew Loki. Both were around for a millennium, and he's still learning new things about them. He really wishes he wasn't learning these things about Odin.

"Are the citizens revolting?" Thor asks. Many of the Asgardian citizens had been quite displeased to learn that their leader performs magic and is therefore argr and not a real man, in their eyes.

"Not yet, but I believe many of them are considering it. They do not want a man who is argr on the throne." Heimdall answers, eyes still staring off into other realms. Or perhaps they're searching the corners of Asgard.

"Jotunheim." Heimdall says suddenly.

Thor frowns, confused. "What of it?"

"Fenrir is in Jotunheim."

"You found him that quickly?" Thor was expecting to have to wait a while, perhaps a few days. Even with all the gatekeeper can see, how had he managed to find the wolf within minutes?

Thor's first thought is to simply head to Jotunheim immediately, swinging Mjolnir and battling Jotuns until he frees Fenrir. After all, those monsters have the wolf chained up somewhere, probably much like the horrible lower dungeons below these halls.

He reminds himself that it's not as if the Jotnar chained Fenrir up. Wouldn't that have been Odin, after Fenrir was in the dungeons? Isn't Odin the monster who forcibly had Loki impregnated, who had magic himself but made it so everyone tormented Loki relentlessly for the same thing?

"Is he starved, too?"

"He appears quite strong. It seems they've been feeding him. But he is indeed chained up."

Well, at least there's that.

Thor pauses just as he opens his mouth to command Heimdall to open the Bifrost and let him into Jotunheim.

The last time he'd gone to Jotunheim had been after the Jotuns invaded during what would have been his coronation. They'd just spoiled it, and he was out for revenge. He and his friends had knocked Loki unconscious and dragged him along, intending to dump their worthless prince there. At the time, Thor had been sure it was Loki who let the Frost Giants in to spoil his coronation.

Once in their realm, he'd started a huge battle after being called "princess" and Heimdall had apparently saved Loki from getting killed in the skirmish.

Odin had been furious with Thor after that and banished him to Midgard. Thor had wondered if any of that had something to do with the fact he'd tried to trade Loki away. That was the whole reason Father had taken Loki as a baby, after all, and there was no reason to keep him anymore. He'd become even more useless than usual, or so Thor thought.

If he goes to Jotunheim alone now, he definitely will not be welcomed, and will almost certainly be outnumbered. Fighting the Jotnar will not help rescue Fenrir.

Thor's next thought is to bring the Warriors Three and Sif, but they'd be just as unwelcome as he is.

"If I may make a suggestion, my liege, perhaps the Queen will assist you with distracting the Allfather, or perhaps even accompanying you. She holds no ill will towards the Jotnar." Heimdall says. "Furthermore, you may want to bring some of your fellow Avengers."

I actually sort of liked Ragnarok's version of where Fenrir was better, but I had been setting this up before I saw that movie, and this is AU anyways. Also, I never pictured Fenrir as a black wolf like in the movie, but that was pretty awesome.

So I've delved into original fiction, and am writing a story about two single dads raising kids with autism and cerebral palsy. Considering you guys are reading this, I'm assuming you're at least mildly interested in disorders or disabilities? Or maybe not. Anyway, if that story sounds at all interesting to you, feel free to check out Fingers Fly on my AO3 profile (YodelingProspector). I'm hoping to write something for Valentine's Day in that universe, which means I'll have less time to work on this.