10If I thought Dust to Dust by The Civil Wars was a beautiful Charloe song before, after the ending we were given in the comics and my attempt to fix it, I find it that much more fitting. Needless to say, that was my inspiration for this fic.
We've Been Lonely, Too Long
The rickety ferris wheel made its way to the ground, their feet dangling only a few feet over the dry pasture. The kid jumped off first, making a run back to the house in time for supper. Charlie however, stayed behind, watching as her brother—now almost the same age as Danny when he passed—hurried along without her.
She looked up at the evening sky and smiled crookedly, thinking of how simple her life was now. It could have been different. He'd given her an out a few nights before everything went to hell. Just thinking of his name, his face, made her shiver.
Bass.
He was always on the back of her mind, like a specter resurfacing from the shadows to haunt her waking hours. Charlie would never say it out loud, but she always wondered what had become of him. The loss of Miles had been like a stab straight through the heart—it would have been easier with him around. She hated to admit it but it was the only truth she held onto nowadays.
The air around her had a sense of renewal, the battles fought all but forgotten by those who now lived in the nano-free world. Her tales were nothing more than that—tales of a woman who had survived and prospered despite unspeakable atrocities. People questioned what was true and what was false. Everyone always doubted her hyperbolic accounts, especially when new details surfaced in her memory.
Charlie didn't mind. She didn't care for fame or recognition. As a matter of fact, she enjoyed being an enigma.
That was the last day I ever saw Sebastian Monroe.
The thought echoed in her head as she traced her fingers over the cold metal that still held up the carnival structure in place. A lie that had been perpetuated every time she rehashed her story. Truth was, the last time she had seen Sebastian Monroe had been under very different circumstances.
Her chest felt a familiar pang, her heart still under the effects off all the things only he could make her feel. The goodbye was as fresh as a newly perforated bullet wound. She knew it would never heal.
Six months had passed since he'd left. Charlie still remembered receiving the letter as if it were yesterday. Her hands trembled when she read the words enclosed in the parchment. The ink had ran, blotching the surface to an almost illegible condition. But she managed.
Charlotte,
What I said that night, I meant every single word. I know I left without notice or warning and for that I am deeply sorry. My head needed space to clear and the pain in my heart needed time to pass. I stand by my last words. I need you by my side. My offer still stands. You can find me at that same place.
-M
Every last word was etched in her mind, imprinted into her like a scalding brand.
Now past her mid-30's, she sat on the seat of that ferris wheel. The same one where one day she'd fantasized about all those places on her postcards. It had been the place where she'd go to dream while awake, imagining a world far more perfect than the one she lived in. And in this place again, she allowed herself to drift, back into a memory that had been her only solace in a sea of constant loneliness.
SIX MONTHS AFTER THE NANO
She found herself riding, miles and miles of outstretched road, all the way to that place Bass referenced in his letter. Charlie looked up at the decrepit establishment as she tied her horse down. The last time they'd spoken had been all too informal. Between gulps of whiskey, he joked about creating a new Republic. When Charlie rolled her eyes at the egotistical remark, he laughed it off. His expression became serious and he uttered the words.
"I want you to come with me."
Her eyes all but bulged out of her skull. "You're crazy." She dismissed him.
"If the world doesn't go to hell when we're done with all this nano bullshit, I want you and Miles to join me." He repeated himself, this time adding Miles to the equation for good measure.
She pursed her lips. "You're serious." Then she laughed, "You're fucking serious."
He tipped his glass to her and then downed it all in one swig. They were just getting into a head-butting conversation when Miles came looking for them. Rachel had found a way to end it and just like Bass had alluded to, everything went to hell for him.
Charlie reached the entrance of the bar, her body buzzing with nerves at the thought of seeing him again. Her mind ran rampant, wondering if he was even there, wondering what she would say, how she would react. But all those thoughts, all those scenarios fizzled into nothingness at the sound of his voice.
"Charlotte."
She turned, facing him and reacting in surprise when she got a good look at him. She expected to see a face that reflected hours of lost sleep, someone so beat down he had aged faster than the average man. But this was Sebastian Monroe, and while he had gone away to get over the loss of his son, Charlie felt silly for even imagining he'd spent all his hours shedding tears and wallowing in depression.
She had clearly underestimated his strength.
"You look great." She blurted out, almost automatically.
He smiled, the marks in the corner of his eyes becoming more apparent. His blue eyes bore into her with curiosity and longing.
Bass hugged her. He felt stronger. Charlie's thoughts were becoming cluttered.
"Not too hard to find the place, huh?"
Charlie looked around, like she could have ever forgotten that was the bar where he once saved her life.
"I'm surprised they even let you in this place, with all the splicing and dicing of human flesh you're so famous for." She teased.
"Are you kidding? They have a plaque on the wall with my name on it, and I get free soup on Tuesdays."
Charlie laughed and they both shared a look that stirred something inside them, like the locking of their pools of blue was a wake up call of some kind.
He tilted his head, beckoning her to follow.
"I thought we were–" she cut herself short. Of course he had other plans.
They arrived at a little house, no more than one bedrooms comprised its interior. It was quaint, modest. In other words, it was nothing like Sebastian Monroe. She took a seat in a wooden chair, facing him as he leaned back into the dining table.
"You live here?"
"Just for a few days. I'm recruiting, remember? Or did you miss the part of my letter where I said I meant what I told you that night?"
She shook her head at his insistence. "I'm not coming with you, Bass. I can't."
He looked at her in silence, a tiny smile appearing on his lips. She knew that look, the gentle tilt of his head and slight narrowing of his eyes. His charm would not work on her.
"Miles wants nothing to do with this new Republic. I won't leave him. He's the only one I have left."
Bass let out an exhale. The disappointment in his eyes was evident. "So this is it? This is where we officially part ways?"
"We parted ways when you left town, remember?" Charlie wasn't sure where her anger came from but it had obviously been bottling up somewhere. She never realized how angry she was with him for leaving them—her—in the first place.
He clenched his jaw. "I didn't think you cared so much."
She stood up, taking a few steps towards his towering frame. "We lost people too. You weren't the only one hurting, Bass. But you chose the easy way out, like always."
"What is that supposed to mean?" He shot back.
Charlie's laugh was condescending. "You're too afraid to face reality, so you run. You hide behind whatever little facade you can build. You pretend you're stronger than your emotions and you know what happens? You become an even more hardened man, unable to deal emotionally when someone gets too close." She paused, "That's what that means."
"What did you expect me to do? Stay, so I could watch you and Miles bond over your new found bloodline?" His voice had risen to an argumentative tone. "Yes, we all lost someone, Charlie. But I lost everyone. Everyone!"
"No!" Charlie screamed, her eyes watering with anger. "You had Miles. You had me!" She cried. "You had me, Bass!" The silence between them was palpable. "And you left me." The magnitude of the hurt he'd caused her settled in when she said the words.
Wiping away the tears that had rolled down her cheeks, she straightened out her jacket and grabbed her bag. "I think we're done here."
With one clasp of his hand, Charlie found her palms crashing against his chest. His fingers wrapped around her, his lips smacking into her with radiating passion. She felt her body respond to his taste. The touch of his hands, the closeness of his body, he breathed in new life to her.
While she was hesitant at first, her hands quickly found their way to the nape of his neck, clawing at the curls of his dirty blonde hair as her lips savored his flavor. When she had a chance to breathe—his mouth now busy exploring the supple skin of neck—she continued to question him.
Her voice surfaced between moans. "Why did you leave me?"
Bass kissed her feverishly as he laid her back on the dining table. "Because I couldn't stand the thought of losing you too." He said between licks and kisses. His hands began peeling off her clothes, layer after layer, until her naked form was before his eyes like the most beautiful of dreams.
His explanation didn't really make sense and at the same time it was completely understandable. Bass chose to leave her behind, afraid that if he stayed, someone or something would take her from him. That, he wouldn't have been able to bear. So, he gave her a choice.
All the feelings she'd ever garnered towards him were flourishing within her body, producing vibrations in every inch of her core. Charlie felt more for this man than she had ever felt towards any other. She'd hated him and loved him like a lunatic, cared for him more than she'd liked to admit, longed for him with an unquenchable need.
She helped him out of his clothes, her bare skin melting into his the moment they made contact. The roughness of his beard scraped her chin, leaving it reddened as he nipped at her lips. Tongues searching for new territory and marking it as their own.
Bass's mouth trailed over her abdomen, slowly descending into the gloriousness of her center. He licked her inner thighs, the taste of her skin and the smell of her sex permeating all his senses. Charlie moaned at the feel of his mouth over her tender flesh, her body receiving multiple shocks of pleasure in a continuous manner. He worked on her for a few minutes before she came undone.
Her heart was beating rapidly.
He lifted one leg carefully, his fingers caressing along the edges of her smooth skin until they reached her toes.
Charlie bit her lip, anxious to feel him inside her.
Pulling her closer to the edge of the table, he teased her opening with his tip. Her pink flesh was glistening and ready for him. Bass filled her up, her walls molding around his pulsating cock and enveloping it with heat. Her breathing hitched. He pumped into her slowly, building up to a faster pace once she was comfortable with his size.
Praises left her mouth in the form of murmurs as he filled her up time and time again.
He leaned into her, taking one hardened nipple between his lips. Charlie arched her back, her hands clinging to his hair as his teeth grazed her tender nubs. Finding his way to her mouth, he kissed her once again.
Charlie's tongue swirled over his bottom lip. "I love you." She muttered.
Bass chuckled between labored breaths. "You don't mean that."
She kissed him again, her lips trying to appease her hunger. "I do mean it."
He smiled. His heart swelling with joy.
"I love you, Charlotte."
His words reverberated in her ears before a million little stars burst before her eyes. Her body was shaking, burning up to the point of combustion as she reached her climax.
Bass picked her up and her legs wrapped around his waist, their chests pressed against each other. Lips locked.
They made love three times that night. In the kitchen, in his bedroom—atop the bed he'd slept in all alone since he'd arrived in town. And then one more time atop a blanket that was draped over the old leather sofa in the living room. That's where they fell asleep, naked in each other's embrace.
The next morning, as she gathered her belongings, Charlie once again had a choice to make.
Bass looked at her with sad eyes as she repeated herself.
"I can't leave Miles. He's my dad."
He didn't do much but nod weakly.
"Come back with me." She said, turning his words around.
Bass was silent but Charlie knew he wasn't even remotely contemplating that option. She knew he had other plans.
"I can't go back there. You know that. Everything that happened. What it did to me."
She could almost hear her heart shattering into a million pieces. The feeling was unbearable.
"If I'm making the right decision, then why does it hurt so much?" She asked, tears welling up in her eyes.
"Because maybe that decision is only right for now." He held her chin up with his fingers, kissing her lips with tender care. "And if you ever change your mind, Charlotte. I will be here. Every year, on the same day, waiting for you to return."
She was crying now. "And if I don't?"
Bass pursed his lips before smiling. "We will meet again someday, Charlotte. I know we will."
Their mouths clashed again, holding on to the moment, cherishing every second before they parted ways.
And that was the last time she ever saw Sebastian Monroe.
PRESENT DAY
Her feet crumbled the dry leaves on the ground. The last days of summer were slipping again, just like they did every year. As she made her way to the house, she thought about the day she had gone back. It had been a year later and it had been raining. A mudslide on the road had halted her progress.
When Charlie got to the dinky, little house there was nothing left but an empty bottle of whiskey and an empty box of cigarettes. He was gone. She took it as a sign, that maybe a life together just wasn't in the cards for them.
The glimmer of a candle illuminated the window as she arrived home. She had most likely missed supper—not that it was a big deal to her nowadays.
She pushed through the door to find the house was quiet. The smell of fresh pot roast still lingered in the air.
Charlie closed the door, leaning back against it.
Her eyes flickered to the corner of the living room.
From behind the lit candle stepped a dark figure. A man. Tall, bronzed skin and unruly hair. The years had been kind to him. The lines etched on his face ran deeper than they had years ago but his electric blue eyes remained forever unchanged. He was still ruggedly handsome, the same virile man with whom she'd fallen in love.
Charlie felt the oxygen leave her body. She cried. Was she dreaming? Was her mind starting to deceive her like it had her mother? Maybe she was sick, maybe the trauma had been too much for her to handle. Losing her mind was the only logical explanation for what she was seeing.
Bass smiled. Her knees went weak.
"Charlotte."
Charlie began to sob. "Is it really you?"
He stepped closer. "I told you we would meet again."
She crashed into his arms, her tears seeping through his shirt until it dampened. Charlie breathed him in, that scent that was so distinctively his.
"How?"
Bass knew what she was asking. "I heard about Miles. I wanted to see how you were doing." He went silent, as if embarrassed to admit the truth. "I checked on you from time to time. You were always happy." He pursed his lips. "You seemed better off without me."
Her heart ached. How had he been so close without her knowing? Why did he let her live a life that didn't include him?
"What changed?" She asked.
He lifted up her chin, staring into her blue eyes. She was a beautiful woman, the same one who drove him mad. "You did."
Her eyes widened. "What?"
"Look at you. Settled into a town that has nothing left to offer. Your fake smiles shielding the sadness behind your eyes. Afraid to get too close because you'll get burned. You're starting to remind me of someone." He chuckled, producing a genuine smile from her.
Charlie knew what she meant. "You're not staying, are you?"
He shook his head. "And neither are you." Bass took a hold of her hands, bringing them up to his lips to kiss them.
She leaned closer, tilting her face upwards to reach his mouth. He smiled against her lips before he kissed her, unleashing years of yearning into precious minutes.
"We've been lonely, too long." He said as his lips brushed against hers. "Come with me, Charlotte."
Charlie couldn't get enough of him. She nodded between kisses. Crying and clutching on to him, afraid to let go.
"Okay, Bass."
The answer was as simple as they came but the meaning it held was unparalleled.
Please take a quick second to leave me a review/comment. I'd greatly appreciate it. Also go watch the Charlie & Bass, Dust to Dust video by kindon18 on Youtube. And if you've already seen it, watch it again :) xoxo
