20A/N: Hello all! I've been on a The 100 Fanfiction kick lately, and I decided to attempt a multi-chaptered fic for my favorite pairings on that show. Most of these theories were given to me by a good friend on Tumblr. Her username is electricbluebutterflies, and you should follow her because she's awesome. Also my username on Tumblr is the same as it is here, so add me!
Enjoy the fic since the show is on hiatus :(
Turning her back on Camp Jaha, Clarke strode down the path to the forest. With every step she took, her heart felt lighter. She had gotten them out alive, and that was all that mattered. Or that's what she tried to tell herself.
As much as she wanted to be around her friends again, she just couldn't handle it. The things she did to get them there could never be forgiven. The betrayed and horrified look on Jasper's face said it all. She would have to bear this alone.
Only armed with a gun and no supplies, she knew where she had to go. There was no reason to fear the forests anymore. The Grounders had retreated back to their village, and as far as they knew their deal with Mount Weather was still on.
For once, she cherished the silence of the forest. There was no fear of being speared in the abdomen or burned alive by acid fog. The smell of grass helped her forget her worries as she took her time strolling through the forest. She even made a game out of dodging tree roots.
Clarke felt oddly at peace. For the first time in a year, she was safe. From humans at least. There was still the wildlife to consider.
Luckily, she had her gun. If she had to defend herself, she hoped that the noise would scare off any other predators nearby. Her trek to dropship was uneventful, and she was thankful for that. She couldn't bear to deal with anything else today.
Scrounging around the camp for supplies, she averted her eyes from the burnt skeletons. Remembering the Grounders she slaughtered in the name of survival only added to the guilt that she was trying to avoid. It had once been seen as a smart move, but now she knew it was no different than Mount Weather. They all had been people with loved ones and family members, just like those at the mountain. Finn certainly hadn't helped things by adding eighteen more lives to their dead.
While the former camp had mostly been picked clean, there were a few overlooked supplies leftover. She found a few crudely made water bottles and knives. After searching thoroughly for an hour, she had a light pack that would last her for a few days. There was no food left of course, but she knew which berries and nuts she could eat.
On her way out of camp, she remembered the jobi nuts. Laughing to herself, she decided to pick some just in case she needed something to light her mood.
Her knife helped her dig up the edible nuts and berries for her trip. They wouldn't be that filling without meat, but they would have to do for now. Her stomach was already gnawing at her. She ate a few as she picked them, hoping to slate her hunger. Rabbit jerky would preferable to this, but she had no choice at the moment.
Before the afternoon, she knew where she had to go. She would have a few days of freedom before Camp Jaha sent people there to scrounge up supplies.
It was an eight hour walk, but she hoped to make it in six or seven. She smirked as she thought about the man she had sent on the same mission. Irony was a bitch.
With enough water and food for the journey, she set off for Mount Weather. She expected to get there before nightfall.
While both of them desperately needed to rest, Octavia and Lincoln decided to wash up not long after returning to Camp Jaha. Hands still clasped together, Octavia notified Bellamy before they set out.
She let Lincoln lead since he knew the area better than she did. Even though their hands were still joined, they said very little to each other. The decisions they made in the past day still weighed heavily on their minds.
Octavia did not regret her decision to stay loyal to her brother, even if it cost her Indra. The older woman that had trained her and turned her into a warrior now viewed her as a traitor. At least it was a step up from being the white she-devil that led Lincoln astray. She smiled as she remembered that Indra had drunkenly confessed that to her.
Lincoln had chosen her as well. He had always chosen her. She admired him more than he could ever know. He stuck to his morals, even if it cost him everything. Well, not everything. She was still here, but sometimes she wondered if that would be enough.
"We're here" his deep voice announced as they came upon a lake. Lincoln began to disrobe, but Octavia looked at the water suspiciously.
"It's safe, Octavia. You won't be attacked here," Lincoln said as he pulled his shirt off. She spared a glance in his direction and let her eyes linger on his well-muscled back.
Sighing, Octavia started to take off her Grounder gear. There were so many pieces to it, she was surprised that Lincoln managed to take his off so quickly. When she was halfway done, she felt large hands cover her own.
"Let me help," he offered, and she nodded without looking at him. She saw his pile of clothing and knew that he must be naked behind her. The process went faster with his help, and soon they were wading into the water.
While Lincoln went for a swim, Octavia sat on the shore and took out her braids. She wasn't a Grounder anymore, even though she never really had been. With every braid she unraveled, it felt like a piece of her was dying. Memories that went along with braids were going to be the past. No more bickering with Caris or getting her ass kicked by Indra. Her days as a Second were officially over.
Once she was done, she scrubbed the war paint off her face. It wasn't her anymore. Neither a Sky person nor a Grounder, she was just Octavia.
Glancing out at the water, she watched as Lincoln glided through the water. She bit her lower lip, as his muscles shined in the light. Oh how she loved his strength. Flashbacks from their stolen nights together filled her mind, and she started wading in the water to join him. He had taught her to swim within the first week of knowing each other.
Once she got into the deeper water, he disappeared. She whirled around looking for him, but then felt arms wrap around her from behind.
"How are you feeling?" he asked.
"Better if we had soap, but this will have to do." She turned her head to kiss him, and he met her halfway.
"Octavia…" his chest rumbling as he spoke. Octavia turned to face him with her eyes wet.
"Everything is all screwed up, Lincoln. They were all murdered for us, including Maya. After everything Jasper did for me, I couldn't save her," she confessed.
She wanted to talk to Jasper, to let him know that she understood what he felt. What she and Lincoln had been through…it had been hell, but they survived it. Maya wasn't so fortunate. She just wished that she could protect him from the pain like her brother tried with her.
Lincoln drew her closer and kissed her forehead. "There was nothing you could do. It wasn't your decision to pull the lever."
"All those children and innocent people, Lincoln. None of them deserved that. If she had just waited!"
Lincoln held her cheeks in his hands and wiped away her tears with his thumb. "Octavia. It was a split second decision Clarke made. Her people over the mountain. I've made the same decision for you several times, and I've never regretted it."
She wanted to argue with him, but the pleading look in his eyes nearly destroyed her. He understands Clarke, she realizes. He'd been put in similar situations, and he made sacrifices so that she could live. She'd done the same for him.
"It wouldn't have happened if Lexa hadn't betrayed us," she finally conceded, but the haunted look didn't leave her lover's eyes.
"It's complicated being a leader, Octavia. I may have disagreed with Lexa, Indra, and Anya's actions, but I've understood them. Even Clarke. They've all made heavy decisions, and it will stay with them."
Like always, he is the voice of reason. There's a small part of her that knows the burdens leaders carry, but since she could have easily been a victim of that missile, she can't forgive them.
"They knew about the missile."
"I know."
Octavia's first instinct is to pull away, but Lincoln held her tightly. So she looked him in the eye instead.
"Lincoln?"
"Like I said, heavy decisions. We have the luxury of not having those deaths on our hands, they don't. While I don't know that warning everybody would have put your brother in danger, I can't rule it out. They took a chance, and it worked in their favor."
"I hate this. Everyone has been making decisions about my life since I was born. My mom made the decision to have me. My brother made the decision to let me go to that stupid dance. Jaha took my mother from me and locked me up. Then those bastards on the council sent me down here. You are the only decision that I have made, Lincoln."
"I know," he sighed. "I understand."
He more than understood. His family had forced to him to be a warrior from a very young age. Then duty compelled him to continue even after his parents died. Duty to his friend Anya. Duty to his mentor Indra. His life consisted of people making choices for him, but Octavia was a choice he made. He saved her from his people, and he was forever proud of that.
Holding her in his arms again made him indescribably happy. After being separated so many times, he was happy to be near her again. To feel her skin against his, and to look into her hazel eyes as if she was the sun to his earth.
Octavia noticed the exact moment where his adoring look turned heated. She lightly stroked his chest with her hands, loving the feel of his muscled abdomen. She should thank the gods every day for sending her a man with the kindness of lover but the hardness of a warrior.
"Make love to me, Lincoln," she whispered as she kissed him again. She needed something to distract her from all this pain. She needed something pleasant after the hellish month they had.
His hands threaded through her hair and massaged her scalp, making her moan. She could feel his erection pressing into her thigh.
"After we wash up," he answered.
They set Abby down on a hospital bed in Medical, but she didn't want to sit still. Kane pushed her back down when she tried to rise out of the bed.
"I have to go to my daughter. I need to see if she's okay," Abby protested, but the regretful look on Kane's face made her stop.
"Abby, I need to tell you something." His head is hung low, and he shook his head.
"Where's my daughter?" Abby asked, her voice a whisper.
"Gone. Bellamy said that she couldn't bear to be here after what she did."
Tears rolled down Abby's cheeks, and Kane held her as sobs wracked her body.
"Clarke is going to be fine, Abby. She's strong. The Grounders have retreated for now, so she'll be fine," he whispered into her hair. He wished there was more he could do to comfort her. This strong woman before him had made some tough decisions of her own, but seeing her like this broke his heart.
"Who's going to protect her from herself? I've been down that road, Kane, and it is not easy."
Kane holds her head in his hands and kissed her forehead. "She's your daughter, Abby. She'll get through this."
Abby looked him in the eye. "I hope you're right." Kane let go of her.
"Now sleep. It's been a long week. I'll be here when you wake up."
He watched as she held his hand while drifting off to sleep. While there were duties he needed to tend to, he would keep his promise. His hand stayed in hers until she woke up later.
By the time everyone got settled into the camp, it was night time. Monty tried to talk to Jasper, but his friend isn't having it. Jasper wasn't doing so well, but there was nothing Monty could do. He couldn't take back Maya's death, no matter how much he wanted to.
So he sought out Miller was with the other survivors huddled near the fire. He wrapped himself up in his sweater and sat next to his thief friend. After sitting in silence, Miller spoke first.
"How's Jasper?"
"Heartbroken. How's your dad?" Monty countered, and Miller smiled.
"Happy to see me again. I practically had to sneak away from him because he didn't want me to leave his sight. I know he cares, but it was too much."
Monty laughed for the first time in what seems like days. "It's been awhile since he's seen you. He missed you." From what Monty could tell, his parents didn't make it when the Ark came to Earth. He would mourn them, but he was too tired to even think about it.
"I get that, but it's weird you know? We've been on our own for months now, and now the adults want their authority back. I say screw them."
Monty clapped Miller on the back. "That's the spirit. Now go tell your dad that."
Miller looked at him like he was crazy. "And get my ass whooped? Are you out of your damned mind? I may be a thief, but I am not crazy."
"I wish we were back at the dropship," Monty admitted. "Before we had to deal with the Grounders, it was peaceful there. At least, our version of peaceful."
"I want to go back too. While I'm glad to have a new place to call home, I feel like I'll suffocate here," Miller said and surveyed the camp. "Everybody is too happy here. It's like they don't understand the hell we went through just to survive out here."
Monty nodded. "But don't forget, they went through hell too. The culling, losing 95% of the population. That has to be hard on them too. They're trying to survive, same as us. We're not that different."
Miller sighed and stared into the fire. "Yeah, well it sure feels different."
Monty looked at him for a bit before placing his on Miller's back comfortingly. "We survived Mount Weather. We can survive domesticity."
Miller studied him for a bit before smiling. "I guess so." He leaned a bit into Monty's touch and turned his eyes back to the fire.
It had been a long journey for all of them, but finally they had a moment's peace.
A/N: I have several chapters written already, so look out for updates. I feel like this fic will be a long one.
