28Prompt: First
Inspiration: Dymx: "You taught me love in this harsh world."
Scenario: In which a waiting Sakura and Kakashi finally see Naruto limping towards them in the horizon. And he isn't alone.
This was posted on tumblr earlier. It was written as a response to the countdown SS Month prompts uploaded on there. Day four's prompt was First, hence the title of this drabble. It's based on a piece of artwork by Dymx, in which Sasuke holds a crying Sakura's hand over his heart.
First
By AngeLhearteD
The longer time dragged on, the more difficult it became to fight off the encroaching sense of despair that threatened to wrap so chokingly around her. She was almost beginning to wish that she'd remained trapped and unresponsive within the mental cage of the ruthless genjutsu he'd cast upon her. For at least, while drifting within the dark, murky tides of unconscious oblivion, she had been spared the agony and uncertainty of waiting. Of not knowing. Of feeling the hope, which she still so foolishly and desperately clung onto in her heart, diminish by the second.
She didn't know where they were. She hadn't enough chakra to even attempt to follow. It had taken the very last of her resources to break out of Sasuke's cruel illusion. Hagoromo had long since departed, and a subdued Kakashi had remained by her side, telling her that there was nothing more either of them could do.
They had to trust in Naruto. That he could somehow connect with Sasuke, with the part of him that they'd failed to reach.
They had to have faith that Naruto would bring him back - and ensure they both returned alive.
But simply waiting felt like an agonising life-sentence. It was akin to pure torture. Sakura's heart pounded, the nausea plaguing her stomach intensifying as terrible thoughts raced through her mind. What if they were both lying bruised and broken in pools of their own blood? What if Sasuke had killed Naruto? What if Sasuke had forced Naruto to kill him?
Terror gripped her. She had promised Naruto she would help him bring Sasuke back. But once again, she could only watch from a distance, wait from the side-lines for him to return.
Once again, she was helpless. Even now, after everything she had endured, there was nothing she could do, nothing she could say or offer, that would make a difference. The harsh reality gnawed away at her insides, clawing her to shreds.
Sakura's eyes, which had been steadily watching the horizon, finally fell. She slumped down next to her silent sensei, feeling oddly numb and detached. His sagging, resigned posture seemed to mirror her anxious, internal thoughts.
Too much time had passed. Naruto ought to have returned by now. It wasn't supposed to take this long.
It was at that moment that her mind finally began to dare process the fearful and painful possibility that neither of them would return.
A sudden, sharp inhalation of breath, however, caused her head to snap up. In an instant, Kakashi had leapt to his feet.
"Sakura," he murmured. His tone was full of something, an open astonishment that caused her heart to jump into her throat. "Look."
Slowly, she forced her aching body to stand again. Slowly, her gaze followed his line of sight.
And that was when she saw it. Two figures in the distance, staggering at a snail's pace towards them.
Her vision blurred, obscured by tears as they shuffled closer. Naruto was waving wildly at them with one hand, shouting enthusiastic words their ears couldn't quite decipher. And supported by his other arm, leaning heavily against him, was none other than the very man Sakura had feared she would never see again.
He was bloodied. He was bruised. But he was alive and allowing Naruto to guide him back.
She lifted a hand to her mouth, her body immediately shaking from the multitude of emotions flooding through her veins.
"Naruto," she released a choked whisper. "Sasuke-kun…"
"He did it," Kakashi exclaimed in awe, as the two neared them at last.
"Hey, Kakashi-sensei!" Naruto yelled joyfully. "Sakura-chan! We're back! Sorry it took so long, dattebayo!" He smiled sheepishly as he dragged himself and Sasuke over a small rise in the rocky terrain. "I really had to kick his stubborn ass, ya know!"
Beside him, a scowling Sasuke grunted. "Shut up, idiot," he muttered underneath his breath. The reality was that they'd both battered one another until they'd barely been able to stand. And somehow, somehow, during the process of attempting to tear Naruto's head off, the Dead Last moron's annoying words had reached him at last. Sasuke didn't understand it. He still wasn't sure he even believed in Naruto's insane ideology. He surely had to be crazy too, to even contemplate following such stupid principles. But his exhausted legs were walking regardless, and though he tried not to show it, the sight of the two other members of the original Team 7 waiting for them was unsettling.
Especially the sight of her. She had broken out of his genjutsu, he ruefully acknowledged – just as he had known she would.
"But everything is gonna be alright now! Believe it!" Naruto blithely ignored the insult, and after ensuring Sasuke could stand unsupported, he finally released him and ran forward towards the waiting pair. Stopping before them, he grinned brightly at Sakura.
"It took a while, Sakura-chan, but I did it. I fulfilled my promise! That's my ninja way, dattebayo!"
The air left Sakura's lungs as she gazed upon her dear friend, blinking back her tears. Incredible fondness swelled in her heart and he laughed awkwardly at the peculiar look on her face. Before she could reach out to him, though, before she could thank him, he placed a hand on Kakashi's shoulder.
"We've dispelled the Infinite Tsukiyomi. Help me check on everyone, Kakashi-sensei!"
"Right," Kakashi nodded. He had never felt so proud.
Leaning forward, Naruto raised a hand to whisper loudly – almost comically - in Sakura's ear.
"Hey, Sakura-chan, Sasuke's really sorry for being such a jerk," he grinned teasingly. "He wants to apologise to you properly!"
With that, he winked and practically hauled his old teacher after him, throwing an arm around Kakashi's shoulders and chattering as they departed.
Naruto… Sakura gazed after his retreating back. Thank you…
Her pulse thundered as she turned her attention back to Sasuke. He was standing in the exact same position Naruto had left him. Not tall or proud as she was used to seeing. He looked… defeated. It suddenly struck Sakura just how lost he seemed. How broken and uncertain and utterly fatigued.
"…" His mismatched eyes were averted to the floor. As if he did not wish to look at her. As if he couldn't.
As if ashamed.
Sakura bit her lower lip. She understood why he had done it. Why he had tried to kill her love for him, once and for all. He had shown her the most horrifying vision. Her greatest nightmare – her death at his hands, before she could save him from the darkness that had been cloaking him so blindingly. And Sasuke had almost succeeded. It had almost broken her. She had very nearly lost her mind to the callous illusion that had felt so terrifyingly real.
In a bid to be alone, to follow his destructive, solitary path, he had tried to push her – and them - away forever.
But what Sasuke still clearly didn't understand was that she would always love him. No matter what he did, no matter what he said; her heart had chosen him a long time ago, against all reason, against all better judgement. And it was that same, selfless, pure love that had given her the strength to dispel his genjutsu.
He had tried to kill her love for him. But he could not kill her.
Just as uncertainly, she walked slowly towards him. Almost fearfully. Even as she wanted to run and throw her arms around him, and reassure him that everything would return to as it was. But she was no fool. No longer an ignorant, naïve child. She knew things couldn't just return so easily to the way they had been before.
Sasuke would need time. A lot of it. And hers was a patient love.
She stopped just before him. Still he refused to look at her. She noted the large, deep scar on his right cheek, the shallower grazes and cuts and dirt marring his chiselled, handsome features.
"Sasuke-kun." Her voice wobbled precariously, paralleling the flip-flops overturning in her stomach.
The soft call of his name seemed to draw him out of his trance at last, for those strange, beautiful, mismatched eyes flicked briefly – almost hesitantly - up to her face.
"…" He said nothing. Simply looked at her. As if waiting for her to berate him for the cruel illusion he had slammed into her to keep her out of his way. As if waiting for her to tell him what came next.
But Sakura did neither of those things. She let her eyes speak to him instead. He read them perfectly, as he always did. And Sasuke was suddenly overwhelmed with anger, with confusion, with pain, with doubt, and above all guilt – overcome by all the maddening things she made him feel – emotions he had tried, so many times, to stem and blot and bury forever. He swallowed back the awful bitterness in his throat. He couldn't understand. He couldn't understand why someone like Sakura would wait for him. Would push herself so far for him, after every dreadful thing he had put her through. How could she not hate him, even now? Why would she still show such dedication toward someone so wretched and wholly undeserving of such compassion, loyalty and selfless love?
He hadn't asked for it, he tried to reason to himself weakly. But it only made the guilt worsen, until it became a crushing pressure inside his chest. He opened his mouth, trying to say something. Anything to break the heavy, tense, suffocating silence crackling between them.
His knotted tongue, however, would not find the words. It was as though it could not form them – or knew not how to begin.
"Sasuke-kun," she repeated his name gently, finding the courage to lift her left hand to reach tentatively towards him. "I understand. And I still-!"
She broke off, almost flinching in sadness and dismay when his right hand lifted in turn, as if to parry hers, to automatically reject her touch, to push her away once again.
But instead, to her astonishment, he held his larger palm before hers – just shy of contact. He stared at the point at which their fingers hovered inches away from each other – as if the sight of it was alien, unfamiliar - before gritting his teeth.
Why was this so difficult? Why did he always find her so impossible to deal with, so dangerous to handle? Sasuke didn't understand why his skin felt like it was channelling static from its proximity to hers. Why the thought of touching her was so unnerving.
He swallowed thickly, suddenly oddly nervous and unsure of himself – unsure of what to do next. He wasn't used to the feeling, and he was certain he did not like it, how disorientating it was. His hand seemed to move of its own accord then, as he closed the gap between their palms, wrapping his fingers firmly around hers. He held it for a moment, letting the touch communicate all the things he couldn't verbally. And Sakura seemed to understand, for her heart soared and her green eyes welled with fresh tears that began to pour once more down her cheeks.
Self-loathing was like an unpleasant taste in his mouth. Always. Always he made her cry. One corner of Sasuke's lips tilted downwards, as his eyebrows drew together marginally.
Always, he caused her pain. It seemed to be the only thing he was capable of doing and good at.
"Sakura…" her name was uttered quietly. He said nothing else as he watched her head bow as she sobbed into her right hand, and he saw then, all too clearly, what the years of their separation had done to her. How much she had suffered in his absence. He knew what it was, to love so hard, so profoundly, something that could not be attained. Something beyond reach. He understood that pain, all too well.
Sakura's eyes flew open in surprise as she felt a sudden thumping sensation against her palm. She looked up, to find that Sasuke had silently placed her hand upon his chest. Right over his heart.
And his eyes. They were fixed on her face. And she saw in them, his silent apology.
His regret. His pain.
His unspoken words. I'm sorry.
She sobbed harder, but through the tears were smiles of indescribable joy and relief. She had known it all along. She had known her Sasuke-kun was still there, still alive deep inside him. It would take time – but she knew – she believed – he would return to her fully again.
"S-Sasuke-kun-!" she wept. "Sasuke-kun, I-" She shook her head and released a short, broken laugh, before moving forward to throw her arms around him.
His reflexes caused him to stiffen at the sudden physical contact. But then her warmth enveloped him, and the memory of her younger self embracing him just like this flooded through his muscles, causing them to gradually relax into her hug. It had been too long, he thought, as his eyes lowered to the ground and a strange stillness settled over him; too long since he had been held like this.
And as Sakura clung onto him, crying into his shoulder, Sasuke did not pull away.
Instead he remained still in place. Letting her hold him for as long as she liked, for as long as she needed. Letting her sob his name, over and over, as her body trembled against his.
Letting her feelings, for the first time, reach him at last.
Author's note
Funnily enough, the prompt for day 4 was first, and this is my first ever entry for a SS month. Many thanks to the talented Dymx for allowing me to use her artwork as inspiration to base this drabble on. I've made it the cover art for this story. You'll also find a link to it on my profile. Please consider kindly leaving her a comment of appreciation, and a review on here, if you favourite either works.
