Chapter 108

I was taken back to Amon Sul in terrible pain and became feverish for a time, but the Healers including my beloved Elien did their best to quench it and set my broken bones. Through their skill and wisdom, I, like so many others who passed through their halls was given another chance and regained some small use of my sword arm and hand in time. I was however filled with despair, for I would no longer be able to fulfil my vow and feared that I would be sent away from Amon Sul, though I knew that the soldiers of Arnor were not cast aside to fend for themselves when they could no longer fight as had been the case in my own land. But it was the wisdom and strength of Elien that saved me, for she saw my despair and spoke wise and gentle words to comfort me. "Esteldir, eighteen years have now passed since we said farewell to our dearest Idhrethil and you swore your oath of vengeance upon those who slew her. In that time you have fulfilled your vow a hundred times over, facing terrible danger and hardship with selfless courage. Now it is time to find another way to serve, for not all wield a blade when they go into battle seeking to defeat the purposes of the enemy. And I will say for my own part that I will not miss watching you march away from these walls again knowing that it might be the last time I ever see you , for each time it has been a pain almost beyond enduring". Tears sprang to her eyes at this and I was filled with love and renewed hope seeing the wisdom in her words. We held each other close for a long while after in wordless silence.

In the days afterwards I was summoned by Lord Norgalad at the tower, and though I first received from him the order of discharge from my duties as a soldier that I had been expecting I then discovered to my great joy that I was not to be sent away as I had feared. He graciously offered me a position as a steward at the tower, to assist and advise him in the course of his duties, and I naturally accepted without hesitation for I deemed this to be a great honour and a clear mark of his approbation. Not only would I now be able to remain with Elien but I would have the opportunity to serve this remarkable man and learn much of the workings of the Tower and Kingdom and perhaps also more of the lore of the stones and the marvellous library. So it proved, and though it was hard at first to know I had been replaced see my men march away without me I soon became used to my new position and the years that followed were among the happiest and most contented of my life. I proved an adept servant to Lord Norgalad, and I was able to put my knowledge of our enemy and the eastern lands and my growing skills as a scribe to good use in his service. But in 1375, after twenty seven happy years I knew sorrow once again in full measure, for Elien was taken from me in her prime after suddenly falling ill with a fever. It had seemed nothing at first, but she declined very quickly and died a few days later as I watched over her at her bedside. Thus did I lose my love, the truest, bravest and most beautiful companion any man could have known, Elien, high born and last of the line of the Dunedain Kings of Rhudaur. I have been blessed to have had two great loves in my life, but equally cursed in that I outlived them both and had to stood by their graves to speak the words of departure for them. But as it is often said it is better to love truly for one day and grieve for one thousand more than never to love at all, and I count myself to have been a fortunate man indeed for the life I have lived.

Now after many long years of peace storm clouds are gathering once more and we will soon face the full might of the enemy again, for one by one our strongholds in the east have fallen and we have been driven back from the river and the bridge. Just as they did over fifty years since the hosts of Angmar now pour southward over the fords into Rhudaur, but it is a very different land to the one it was then for now it lies ravaged, ruined and half empty. For in the end the Hillmen were deceived and betrayed and they have become little more than thralls to the Kingdom of Angmar.

I am ninety seven years old now and I begin to grow old and infirm, for the blood of the west always ran thinner in the veins of the men of Rhudaur than in those of Arthedain, and in my own case it was further divided. Few if any of the exiles of Rhudaur now remain, for age and long years of war have taken their toll on us and there are none who now live who can remember the land of Rhudaur as it once was in my Grandfather's time, peaceful and prosperous enough, even if false pride estranged us from our kin and led us to disaster in the end. For Rhudaur was a fair and rugged land of river, crag and vale, lowland and forest, her people proud and resourceful, her towns and keeps ancient and well wrought. But little now remains from that time, and since it seems all other records and histories must now be lost I conclude this account in the hope that it will serve as a lasting testament to all that was good and noble in the land of my birth before it fell into darkness and despair.