11Try, Just Give Me a Reason, Young and Beautiful, Wintersong, Born to Die.
It took me four days and I'm just not splitting it up I'm not I won't I refuse here have one hell of a one-shot.
Honeymooning
When becoming involved with someone else, there was what a lot of people liked to call the 'honeymoon phase'. This was the space of weeks or perhaps even a few months where the bed was always needlessly large, the gap between visits agonizingly long, the kisses intoxicatingly sweet, and every gesture and touch both magnetic and addicting.
Arthur Kirkland was not immune to the charms of the honeymoon phase, but he did take one very strong issue with it: after the honeymoon was over, what was left?
Not an awful lot when you were busy travelling and jumping on and off of airplanes all the time. Distance only made the heart grow fonder until the heart got sick of waiting or annoyed with the weight of constantly being tethered down. The expectation to call turned into demands for attention, and the requests for a night or two of quiet became ultimatums which (ultimately) led to more stress than happiness. As soon as a lover became a nagging source of guilt, it was always better for both parties to cut ties completely.
And that was why Arthur woke up with a very soft, but very real, sense of disappointment when he pulled himself slowly out of sleep and found himself laying on his side between familiar sheets, tee-shirt and boxers untouched because the other person in the bed behind him wasn't cuddled up tight against his back.
He didn't want the Honeymoon phase to be over already, not this soon…
Rolling slowly onto his back under the thick fall covers of the bed, Arthur yawned between his teeth and cracked his eyes open, taking a look at the brunette still soundly sleeping next to him.
Feliciano Vargas was an art dealer, someone who spent almost as much time travelling as Arthur did albeit to a variety of different places. Arthur's firm was international, and although he was based in London he was usually in Paris a few days a week and Berlin at least once a month. Feliciano's answer was always changing whenever Arthur bothered to ask where he was officially paying rent: a flat in Vienna, a townhouse with his brother in Rome, Arthur's apartment in London…
He was completely oblivious to the world right now though, auburn hair tousled from sleep and curled rebelliously in spirals and waves that he religiously ironed out every few days. His dark olive skin was one of the things that had caught Arthur's eye months ago at a social mixer, that and his smile: the gentle, constant curve of his bowed lips that was still there now as he dreamlessly slept away the morning. There was stubble growing in along his jaw and over his top lip too, a sight as rare as the curls in his hair because he preferred himself clean-shaven.
He also preferred to sleep in the nude, something Arthur found curious but had no real objections to: they'd both been naked the first several times they'd woken up together, so the lean runner's body in front of him and hidden under the wine-red comforter was pleasing to wake up to.
Getting into an actual relationship together had been an accident? They'd both just come out of long and emotionally exhausting commitments, therefore they (as well-to-do, heart-broken men were often wont) had hooked up casually after crossing paths too many times in London and then running into each other in Paris where they'd finally exchanged names and a little bit more.
It could have ended there if Feliciano hadn't taken Arthur's cell phone by mistake the next morning after leaving the hotel, or if Arthur hadn't pulled Feliciano's wallet out of his pocket that evening after a brief meet-up to swap the electronics. Chasing the idiot all the way to Vienna had cost Arthur almost three hundred pounds (kindly do not ask why), but the relief of having his credit cards and licences restored had encouraged Feliciano to take him to dinner. And then back to bed.
And then through four glorious months of honeymooning in train stations, by-invitation dinners, art exhibitions and all sorts of dream-like montages liberally sprinkled with sweet domesticity. They were both habitual joggers and played the guitar: although Feliciano greatly preferred the acoustic to Arthur's electric. Their politics matched up just well enough left of center that they'd yet to find something really important to disagree about, and Arthur knew keeping a tidy budget and home the way Feliciano could cook for and plan an entire three week business trip in about fifteen minutes. Had Arthur mentioned his smile yet?
They weren't that far away from each other on the bed, so Arthur decided that if he wanted a good morning kiss then he was going to get a good morning kiss. No need to fuss or squirm about the issue, he just rolled onto his side and reached one arm out to brace on the other side of his sleeping lover, lowering his head down to kiss the blissful curve of Feliciano's half-parted lips. There was a soft intake of breath from the man under him in bed, and then a wide, heavenly smile that opened up under the brief kiss before Arthur pulled back.
"How long have you been awake?" Arthur demanded, still propped up over him as Feliciano squirmed with a grin and shuffled onto his back, eyes still closed.
"Maybe five seconds…" Feliciano brought both arms up high over his head and there was a great injustice being done by the bed-sheets completely obscuring the fact that he was giving his whole body a stretch. When a warm hand fumbled blindly for Arthur's shoulder and the back of his neck, he rolled his eyes with a light scoff before dipping down again for another kiss. It broke as soon as Arthur felt the unfamiliar grain of stubble against his lips and laughed, settling his weight over Feliciano's torso so he could tuck his head down against his lover's ear, Feliciano whining something in his ear before his hands started fighting with the tangled sheets.
"It's not funny-"
"No, but your reaction is." Arthur picked his weight up enough to let the blankets out from between their chests, then settled back down and was rewarded with Feliciano's arms locking tight across his back, one hand ignoring his shirt completely to rest along his side with a certain sense of entitlement. Oh well, as long as he was warm then Arthur didn't mind giving him a kiss below the ear. "You give the same sigh every morning, why don't you just wax it off?"
"I made that mistake once with my chest and never again." Feliciano kept hugging him and tucked his face against Arthur's throat, his body stretching and tensing up again before he gave a long, slow sigh and just seemed to melt into the mattress under them. He dropped his head back on his pillow and his hug fell away a little, a cold stab finding Arthur's heart when he realized that maybe this was Feliciano getting bored.
"Well if it's any consolation: I prefer you like this." He made the comment to cover the uneasy way he felt himself swallow and then struggle to get up off of his boyfriend. He made it as far as putting his head down again on Feliciano's chest when his lover's hand brushed slowly and softly through his hair, legs shifting under the blankets until Arthur gingerly shuffled over so he was laying between his boyfriend's legs and had fingertips tracing the coarse dark hairs decorating his chest.
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing." Arthur answered too quickly and winced for it. Feliciano's warm hands were still stroking his hair and running back and forth along his shoulders now. He was being held close and safe and the smell of his skin was relaxing and familiar, so Arthur fumbled for a lie and spun it: "Bad business meeting, nothing I can do about it now." Arthur closed his eyes because it meant he could feel Feliciano's heartbeat through his skin, and it helped him think ahead faster than his lover could speak.
"I thought you said your meeting went really well yesterday?"
"Oh, on paper of course it did." Arthur was used to double-talk and half-truths, that was simply how his day to day business affairs were handled. "But you know that brand of humiliation when you stand up and realize your fly was down the whole meeting? Or you go fetch your jacket for a smoke break and once you get outside you realize it's your boss's jacket instead of yours?"
Feliciano laughed and held him tight again, Arthur rubbing his smile into his lover's throat as he was inched up by the tender embrace. He could have purred softly when Feliciano kissed his hair, but was intrigued when his lover pulled both knees up on either side of Arthur and then coaxed his head up with a thumb along and sweeping under his jaw.
"I think I know how to help you." Oh? Arthur couldn't feel anything especially exciting pressing up from under him, but he took the brief kiss from his grinning lover without commenting on that fact. "The no-work game?"
Arthur groaned.
"I don't like that game." He stated. "I always lose that game!" To expect either of them to simply not mention or talk about or refer to their professions for however long they agreed to was terribly unfair. Arthur couldn't count the number of times Feliciano had tricked him into mentioning something from a business meeting or a random detail about the company. Being released from his hug also wasn't going to help convince him, but Feliciano only let go so he could prop himself up on his elbows and sit up just enough that Arthur had to sit up too. Their lips locked briefly and Feliciano pulled back with a sultry lick over his own lips, dark eyes half-closed and targeting Arthur's mouth so hard he could almost feel the stare. Add in the breathless tone of his voice and the subtle lean forward and it all made what he had to say sound all the more appealing.
"Twenty minutes?" Because they kissed again with just the right bit of force and spread lips to convince him. Arthur was the one to pull his lover's bottom lip into his own mouth, licking and sucking hard to stop him from talking as his hands slid off Feliciano's chest and hit the bed, propping him up and putting weight on their overlapping hips. "Loser can-" A-ah! He'd hadn't given Feliciano permission to take his mouth back, so Arthur followed him on the retreat and was there to interrupt him with a demanding nuzzle and an aggressive nip that made his partner gasp softly before kissing back. He hoped Feliciano's eyes were closed, because Arthur's certainly were as he gave a shallow but unmistakable thrust down on his lover's bare hips to break the kiss.
"Loser can make breakfast when I'm done with him." It didn't matter who took what role most of the time, and Arthur didn't particularly care if they went all the way with each other so soon after waking up. It was a treat to have Feliciano like this though: curly-haired and rough with stubble, no colognes or shampoos, just his skin and hair and hot bronze skin as Arthur tilted his head for a properly deep kiss. He brought one hand up under his lover's shoulders and stroked along the raised part of his back, and Feliciano groaned softly before getting a hand behind Arthur's head again, mouth open but anything but passive and pliant through the kiss. It was Feliciano's turn to rut up against him this time, and Arthur grinned until the kiss broke before dipping his head to find the side of his lover's neck, following him with a laugh when Feliciano gasped and dropped flat on his back again so he could use both hands to inch Arthur's shirt up.
Before his shirt hit the floor, Arthur's 'I don't mind' attitude was replaced with the need to hear his lover come undone under his hands. It was going to hurt too much to lose this, to wake up and be exasperated by wandering hands instead of flattered and pleased by them, to hear 'let's play a game' and start desperately checking the clock to know when it would end. He didn't want that first fight when he told Feliciano where to find the apartment key because Arthur would be out of town unexpectedly and have to cancel their weekend. He could live a long time without the bitter text messages that would follow him even if Feli was still trusted and welcome to use the flat in his absence. He didn't want to come home and find Feliciano's drawer empty and a passive-aggressive letter left taped to the bathroom mirror, angrily post-dated 'whenever you get back from wherever the hell you've been this month'. No accusations and no-
"And do I dream again?" What? "For I find the Phantom of the Opera is-" WHAT? "-inside my mind!"
"Cazzo…!"
"What the hell is that?" And had he just heard Feliciano swear? The song was grainy and electric, obviously being pumped out of speakers too tiny for the duet singing from across the room.
"It's my phone, get up for a second?" Arthur dropped his weight completely and heard Feliciano squeak and fuss about with his arms trying to get free. "Arthur that's not funny!"
"Who's calling?" He demanded, rightfully put out at being interrupted.
"It's Sadik." Who? "Sadik, from the galleria." From where? "The gallery!" What was that? "Work, Arthur!"
"I thought you'd say that." Arthur did roll over because he couldn't imagine being very happy with the roles reversed, their legs a tangle that almost got him kicked as Feliciano left the bed completely in his naked glory to find the jacket he'd worn yesterday and the smart phone lodged in the pocket. That had lasted for all of, say, three minutes? "I prefer my eggs soft boiled on toast, thank you."
Arthur got a look for that as Feliciano pulled the phone out and swiped his thumb over the screen, holding it up with a cheerful "Ciao, Sadik!" as Arthur sighed and regretfully checked himself under the covers. He would have much, much rather kept his lover pinned and at his mercy, because watching him stand over there without a stitch of clothing was extremely unfair. The lines of his shoulders and lean muscles down his arms, a spiral of downy red hair along the small of his back that he probably never noticed or saw himself, but Arthur did, and that with the quiver of his lover's thighs and the toned muscles of his legs made Arthur frown deeply and finally pull himself out of bed. He could at least brush his teeth while Feliciano was on the phone pretending he hadn't been gasping and humming so pleasantly a few moments ago.
"No, I said we cancelled that today." Arthur's bedroom had a small en-suite bathroom which, sadly, lacked a bathtub but did have an enclosed shower. He was just starting with his teeth and admiring the atrocious mess Feliciano had made of his hair when the conversation registered for him: "I told you on Thursday! I'm taking the day off. No, I definitely told you, check your e-mail!" Day off? Why would he do that when he was the kind of person who worked on commission and only got paid for closing deals? Arthur wracked his brain as he filled his mouth with peppermint suds, distinctly recalling Feliciano telling him his latest deal with Sadik Adnan was supposed to be worth over fifty-thousand euros, and a satisfying chunk of that was set to end up in his bank account.
"There, see? I told you. I already rescheduled- yes, yes, of course at country club! Don't forget your tennis racket tomorrow." Arthur chuckled to himself and spat into the sink. The world's best business deals were closed on golf courses and tennis courts. "-Arthur? You mean Arthur Kirkland? I can definitely ask him, sure?"
Feliciano leaned into the bathroom doorway with his straight nose all wrinkled with confusion and brown eyes cut down by his brows. He didn't have to look so cross but Arthur couldn't explain with a mouth full of paste, so he mimed swinging a club to remind his boyfriend of the golf tournament they'd gone to where Arthur had met Mr. Adnan in person instead of keeping him as just a faceless, voiceless force in Feliciano's business life. Feliciano answered by swinging one arm like he was holding a tennis racket and then pointed at the phone, and Arthur kept up the game by holding up his left hand and rubbing the base of his ring finger.
"Oh, is your wife Sakura coming? We can play doubles if they both agree!" Arthur wasn't offended by pretending to not be in the room and was very quiet with the water and rinsing his mouth out properly where the mint had begun to burn. He knew which of his co-workers either could or really should not know how he conducted his private life.
Bonnefoy was annoying but entirely liberal, however Yao from the Beijing office was a bit of a pain. It was Feliciano's burden to decide who knew what in his circle too.
This was the sort of understanding that had carried them through the very first month, because it had been the same issue that had sunk Arthur's last reasonably healthy relationship. Thank God he had transferred back to New York…
"Hurray! I'll let him know and we'll see you on the courts tomorrow, nine o'clock? Perfect, ciao, Sadik, ciao!" And then came the silence of the phone-call ending, a sorry effect of new phones but Arthur just turned the tap on high and bent over so he could wash his face. He heard his boyfriend wander into the bathroom, and when he was done with the soap and warm water there was a towel being held out for him as he straightened up.
"Thank you," for the towel, "and a tennis brunch tomorrow sounds lovely." He had his eyes and face covered as he spoke, and that was why he didn't see Feliciano get behind him until he felt warm arms slide around his waist and felt his lover lean against him with a kiss on the back of his neck. The surprising part was Feliciano resting his cheek there on Arthur's nape like he was sad. "Feli?"
"You aren't mad, are you?" What?
"Over you answering your phone? Of course not." And he wasn't upset about being invited to tennis either!
"I mean about me getting out of bed." What nonsense, Arthur dropped the towel on the counter and tipped his head back, twisting his neck so he could rub against his lover and encourage Feliciano to stand up properly behind him and put a kiss on his cheek, hands over his where Feli'd linked them under Arthur's navel. "I promised, I'm sorry."
"Promised…?" Now, Arthur usually had a very good memory for things like promises and appointments. Speaking of which, Feliciano'd just broken one of the latter: "What spurred you to take the day off?"
"You did?" Oh dear, that was a confounding answer that only invited more questions. They were watching each other in the bathroom mirror, so Arthur didn't have anywhere to hide his scowl. Feliciano straightened up and stopped leaning into him, the contact still there along Arthur's back and Feliciano's hold on him still sweet and strong, but they were using the mirror to keep eye-contact. "You said you wanted to spend the day in bed together. Movies? Music? You really don't remember?"
Arthur had no reason not to want a day in-bed with his lover, laptop set up on the chest of drawers with a stack of DVDs and extra pillows pulled out of the linen closet.
But Arthur still had a one-o'clock executive's brunch today.
And there was a glitter of panic creeping into his lover's reflection, that silent horror of realizing he'd just postponed an extremely important meeting to spend time with someone who didn't want to-
"I don't," Arthur admitted, turning around sharply and taking Feliciano by the shoulders to pull him into a fast, almost crude kiss so he absolutely could not even begin to think that this was a fight about to blow up and shatter the glass bubble they'd built around this relationship. "-but I believe you and that's exactly what we're going to do today."
"Arthur if you have work-" Arthur kissed him again, fighting through the words Feliciano wanted to say and dropping his hands under his warm arms so he could hook them up behind his shoulders and hold him, just hold them chest-to-chest because please no fighting, he couldn't stand to have a fight and have everything fall apart. Everything good and beautiful had to end at some point but Arthur wasn't ready yet: he was not ready yet.
"I have you." He felt short of breath and probably looked it too, because Feliciano's eyes were wide and his hands felt shaken and unable to decide how to hold him, they ghosted down his shoulders and along his arms, but Feliciano's touch didn't settle as Arthur threw words at the silence before it could form. "I'd rather have you so if you've got the day off, Feliciano, then I'm taking one too."
"Arthur you look afraid, what's wrong?"
"Nonsense I feel fine: let's go back to bed."
But Feliciano looked worried, brushing his fingers back through Arthur's hair again before letting his hand be taken like a child and they both walked back into the bedroom. They didn't share a kiss as Arthur climbed back into bed first though, in fact Feliciano didn't touch the sheets at all as he quickly excused himself to brush his teeth and shave in the bathroom. Arthur couldn't come up with a sensible way to argue with that decision, so he was left in painful, awkward silence when Feliciano grabbed a pair of red boxers from his single drawer in Arthur's dresser and vanished into the bathroom.
He'd been half-hard before the phone call but now his body felt clammy and small, shrunken down from head to toes because he'd woken up with a sad feeling and now the cold was creeping into every thought and whisper. Arthur wound up standing and pacing around the bedroom as non-chalantly as he could manage with his nerves as he swiped his phone up off the desk by the window.
It was ten thirty, hopefully plenty of time as he picked out the contact he wanted and called in to cancel.
"Bonnefoy-"
"Oho, called into gloat have you?" What? It was definitely Francis' voice coming through the phone, but Arthur still quickly pulled it from his ear to check the name and number. Yes, this was him… "Honestly, taking the day off and then disturbing those of us who have to carry your sorry reputation for the day?"
"What are you nattering on about?"
"So you've changed your mind and are on your way in?"
"No?" What? "I mean not anymore, I was just calling to-"
"Say exactly what you said last week about blowing off the Brunch, oui, Arthur, we know! Now enough of this pretentious attitude, we both have more important thing to do today." Arthur was stunned by the response and barely choked out a 'what?' before he heard Francis give a dramatic sigh. "See you tomorrow, Arthur!" he announced, and then hung up.
Arthur just stood there a few more moments, listening to the water running in the bathroom and staring at the name and flashing number of the call length before he gave up.
He'd already booked the day off.
He'd already booked it off last week.
And he'd convinced Feliciano to do the same thing.
It was so much easier to just creep back into bed and lay there on his belly, face buried in Feliciano's pillow, than try to sort out the fact that he had no idea where this had come from but at least knew he really did want it. A day off, one more day to just honeymoon with kisses and touches and sweet things before it all turned bitter in the end. His chest hurt just thinking about it…
Feliciano took so long in the bathroom that Arthur almost fell asleep, fingers grasping for cheerful memories to distract him from the impending doom of boredom and frustration. When he felt a warm hand come and settle between his shoulder blades it startled him, but Feliciano's touch led with fingertips that pressed and pushed across his back before the warmth of his palm soothed the pressure. Two hands rubbing over his shoulders made Arthur hug the pillow under his face and close his eyes again with a soft breath. He was happy to shift his legs and hips so there was plenty of room on either side of him for Feliciano to come and straddle his hips from behind, warm hands pushing and twisting along his neck and sides, kneading deeply until Arthur groaned gently in appreciation for the massage.
"Are you going to tell me what's wrong?" Feliciano asked the question with his hands caressing the sides of Arthur's stiff neck again, thumbs pressing down along the base of his spine. When Arthur felt the weight on him shift a little so Feliciano was on his knees, one of his hands vanished and the other slid down Arthur's shoulder in a hold he understood. As comfortable as he was on his stomach, he slowly rolled over so he was facing his lover again even if he didn't have all of his words put together yet.
Feli made it easier on him though, because their hands found each other and wove together, Arthur's wrists pushed down onto the pillows next to his head without any talking. He felt cold and disturbed inside, but everything Feliciano was doing made him feel a little safer. Arthur was the one to spread his legs a little, patient with the pressure on his hands as his boyfriend shifted and moved, navigating cotton sheets and that thick comforter to settle between Arthur's legs and press their hips together.
And then his lover kissed him too, eyes closed, weight settling so easily over Arthur that he leaned up into the breath of mint and cool scent of fresh aftershave. Feliciano's soft lips pressed and pulled over his in a coaxing, comforting way that made him struggle not to melt. Feliciano was forever the one to back down in a lip-lock though, playing affection like a game to force Arthur to come after him and demand deeper, longer kisses.
He bent his legs on either side of Feliciano, feet flat on the mattress and thighs cradling the hips on top of his with a gentle rocking motion. Feliciano didn't smile, but he did break the kiss to lap at Arthur's lips until he tugged a hand free of his lover's hold. He wanted to tangle his hands in Feliciano's hair and pull him down so he could stop trying to escape, and on top of the liquid pleasure of kisses substantial and deep, Feliciano's hips pushed down on him properly, a strangled groan getting caught in Arthur's throat as they started to grind and flex into each other.
The boxers they were both wearing would have to go eventually, but Arthur wanted his other hand free first and with a diligent tug Feliciano released it. There was so much skin to touch, a full caress down his lover's closed eyes and long cheeks, out over his shoulders and then under along his chest before finding his back and so much smooth warm skin that Arthur pulled him down so they were chest-to-chest on the bed. Feliciano broke the kiss again but this time he travelled, breaths short and hot down Arthur's cheek as his jaw was grazed and those bowed lips latched onto the sensitive skin under his ear. Tongue and teeth and with a relieved gasp Arthur brought his hips up in a full arc, slowing right when the pressure felt perfect between them and stressing his back and legs to make the sensation last. He had Feliciano's arms cradling him under his shoulders, fingertips digging hard into his spine against the mattress before one hand wandered confidently down his side and over his hip, jumping over the elastic of his boxers and finding Arthur's knee when he willingly pulled his leg up for Feliciano to touch him.
They had a slow, dissatisfying rhythm going, too shallow and subdued, but Feliciano's hand swam straight up Arthur's thigh and his warm fingertips made Arthur gasp and tilt his head back. There wasn't much space between their hips, but Feliciano moved from one side of his throat to the other and twisted his spine just right so his hand could palm down the inside of Arthur's thigh all the way to his crotch, muscles a tense mess until with a soft hush at his ear he let his hips relax and his legs fall open, ankles hooking behind his lover's knees as his touch explored familiar territory in a most intimate way.
"More?" Feliciano dared to ask, shoulder down and lips too far away to kiss him with such a light, fondling caress down between Arthur's legs. He left the most exciting places alone so their hips could grid and rock, touch grazing back and forth teasingly at the join between Arthur's legs, not far back enough to sneak inside his body, not far enough forward to handle him fully. A fingertip drawing tiny circles against dry skin made answering that question so hard…
"Don't play coy just because I…" Arthur stopped speaking but the thought kept going, the cold biting into him again and making him tense up. It was ridiculous to think Feliciano wouldn't notice when they were tangled together and building everything up beautifully, but the hand between his legs was suddenly withdrawn and the hips over his stalled. "Nevermind! It- it's alright."
"Arthur?"
"I'm fine, keep going I- no, no!" Feli was straightening out and trying to lift himself up off Arthur's body, something he absolutely was not going to consent to after so much attention and seduction. Both his arms snapped up around his lover's head to stop him. "Feliciano don't."
"Don't what? Don't worry?" No: don't get mad, don't let that tense tremble in his voice take over. Arthur didn't want it to end- please don't… "Arthur, tell me what's wrong."
Feliciano tried getting off and Arthur refused to unwind his legs from around his boyfriend's knees, persistent to the point of desperation so that as soon as Feliciano gave up and settled down on his side next to him the blond could curl up tight against him, arms locked under his arms and one knee hiked up over the other man's hip. Feliciano couldn't resist physical contact: at least that was what Arthur was praying for until he felt a close, comforting arm drape around him, fingers finding his hair to ruffle again. He felt a tender kiss press against his temple and slowly squirmed and kicked his way further up onto the pillow, nose to nose with his boyfriend and nuzzling there until Feliciano tried to kiss him again chastely.
Fine then, out with it:
"I love you," Arthur admitted, and as much as he wanted the protection he just couldn't close his eyes. "And I don't mean I love the sex or conversation, or the little games or outings we go on alone or with friends." Feliciano didn't look like he really understood what Arthur had just blurted out, but he was listening with his kiss-red lips softly parted and his head tilted so he could hear just fine and not lay there half-deaf with an ear against the pillows. But the more things Arthur listed off that he didn't love, the more he saw those caramel brown eyes slowly starting to react and, he hoped, brighten as they widened. "It's not the cooking or the music or when we out-last each other jogging through the park, it's- it's that I love you." He loved him and he loved all those other things that were intrinsically wrapped up in Feliciano. "And I… and I'm just very afraid of losing that."
Oh god, the silence. The way Arthur had to drop his eyes to his lover's throat with them still cocooned in each other's arms because there was nothing for him to listen to. Under blankets and wrapped tight in an embrace, Arthur felt the heat leaching out of him. He was about to be pushed away, a rough cough and a made up lie about forgetting something for work, a chaste kiss on the cheek and a false promise to talk about it later. Or maybe Feliciano would be more subtle about it, maybe the kiss on the cheek first and a close hug that felt more like something you'd give a team-mate on the football pitch than a lover who'd just confessed.
Gingerly, as much from the cold, deflated sensation in his hips as from the crushing chill around his heart, Arthur pulled his leg down first under the covers. His first sign of retreat was what snapped Feliciano back into the moment from whatever panic he was internalizing on Arthur's behalf.
Feliciano did hug him, but it was nothing like a team-mate's pat on the back as Arthur was squeezed tight enough to feel a harsh, shaking breath rattle through his lover's chest before he gave a rough breath like he was about to cry.
"Feli?"
"No just- just wait…" he was crying, Arthur felt the damp touch on his shoulder and nearly panicked, arms locking around Feliciano's torso before he started pushing, one eye on the edge of the bed to make sure he wasn't about to throw them both off the mattress. Once Feliciano was on his back his lover let go of him and brought both hands up to cover his eyes, lips quivering and cheeks flushed. It was Arthur's turn to try and sit up this time, but Feliciano wouldn't let him get higher than his own elbow: "No no! I'm fine- I was just scared, I was terrified, Tesoro. I thought- I adore you but I thought it would be something else."
"Don't be ridiculous, what else could it have been?" Adore, Feliciano'd just said he adored him… "Feli look at me."
"I'll stop crying in a second, I promise."
"I've seen you cry over sillier things, you ninny." And this was one of the first times he'd seen Feliciano act like his tears were something to be ashamed of. He could be shameless about all sorts of things, but his own emotions rarely fell into that bracket. "Please, darling."
Arthur had to pry one of Feli's hands off his face just to replace it with his own palm against his cheek and fingers swiping away quiet tears. Between the need to be close and calm down they both sat up on the bed, Feliciano twisting to rest his shoulder against Arthur's chest and lean into him, taking one of Arthur's legs across his lap and the other behind him, arms hooked and holding on so they could stay together.
"Can you say it again? I thought I'd say something like it but I just…" Arthur kissed the corner of his eye to calm him down, closing his eyes and nuzzling into his lover's hair to prove how close he wanted to stay.
"I love you," he repeated, and he was rewarded with Feliciano relaxing gently into his arms. "So if you're going to leave, I recommend you do so n-" And then he was interrupted by his boyfriend twisting around and giving him a fast, affectionate kiss on the mouth to shut him up.
"I need you," Feliciano answered, voice low and face pressing up until their foreheads were touching and Arthur closed his eyes at the sensation of their noses locking gently. "I adore you, so please don't get bored with me."
"Bored with all your smiles and games?" Arthur lifted the knee behind Feliciano's back and let go where he'd been holding tight along his lover's shoulders, fingers rising to twist and tangle with the brandy-coloured ringlets still spilling down his neck from his rebellious hair. "Alright, but only if you promise to be patient with me."
"Patient?" Feliciano twisted his legs so he was resting on one hip, a hand sliding up and down Arthur's thigh outside the grey cotton of his boxers. But the sound of his little chuckle and the way he nipped at Arthur's unwilling smile were slowly driving the cold out of his fingertips and gut. "I've only seen you mad when you're drunk."
"I've been mad plenty of times," he argued.
"Yelling fits with Francis don't count: you went right from slinging insults to telling me I looked good in my suit without taking a breath."
"Fair enough, but you did look good and I wasn't talking about my temper…" Arthur kissed him first this time, another chaste touch on Feliciano's freshly shaved cheek as his fingertips wandered down his lover's chest. He paused and brought his lips up over Feliciano's ear, making his next admission very softly… "Just because I'm not here with you when I say I will be, Feliciano, it won't mean I didn't want to be here."
"Like when you make me cancel work to spend time with you, and then you tell me you forgot?"
"Yes, exactly like that. Can you forgive me?"
"No." That answer was jarring not only for the content, but for how softly Feliciano said it with the hand on Arthur's thigh drifting up to stroke across his stomach and then patiently walk up his chest to his collarbone for more slow, sensitive touches. Feliciano's other arm uncurled from behind Arthur's back too, a rush of fear muted by confusion telling him to keep quiet when he felt his lover retreating only to put both hands gently on his chest and then start to push. The distance gave Arthur a clear view of the smile tugging on his lover's lips though, perhaps not as radiant as the ones Arthur was so fond of, but still there. There was a warm, thorough motion to his eyes as he looked Arthur up and down, forcing him back until the blond had to let go of him and prop himself up on his own hands.
Feliciano's smile grew deeper, and then he pushed a little harder to make Arthur slowly retreat onto his elbows. He didn't get the message until Feli twisted around between his legs and moved like he was threatening to physically climb on top of him, at which point Arthur finally fell onto his back.
"No…?" He asked, because it felt like there should have been more to that answer if his lover was so happy to re-arrange how their legs were getting twisted around again. There was a soft, safe delight in feeling the mattress bend with Feliciano's hands on either side of him now, such an affectionate smile beaming down on him between curtains of tousled red hair that Arthur just wanted to reach up and touch again. Instead, he watched the muscles along his lover's arms and chest flex as Feliciano lowered himself down so his lips were hovering where they belonged over his.
"Of course not. How can I forgive you for something I wasn't even angry about?" Feliciano tricked him and fell to kiss Arthur's cheek again, warmth coming off his skin as he travelled quickly down the side of his neck again.
"Haa- so you didn't want to spend time together?" He was being a jerk and lifted a hand up through Feliciano's hair to hold the back of his head to make up for his horrid sense of humour. Arthur was punished with a sharp pinch at his nipple by his lover's fingers and grinned when Feliciano came back up to loom over him, a familiar darkness soaking into those brown eyes and a less than innocent turn to his lips.
"I could always call Sadik back."
"Or you could tell me how to make it all up to you…" Oh, that was the answer Feliciano wanted to hear, because he only licked his lips like that if there was one thing on his mind, and Arthur was not about to discourage him.
"Say it again," he demanded, slowly shuffling back off of Arthur and the bed, but as soon as he was standing Arthur got to watch him slip his thumbs under the bright red band of his boxers and run them along his own hips.
"I love you, darling." And he loved the way he was still warm where Feliciano had been laying on him, purring softly because the two of them could easily keep eye-contact while Feliciano's hands pulled out the drawer of Arthur's night-table and went straight for what they wanted. Just the soft plastic thunk of the little bottle hitting the table sent an eager spike of warmth through his hips. They'd already had two false starts and Arthur was quite through with playing cat-and-mouse with the mood as the foil on the condom packs crinkled and twisted apart.
Feliciano brought the lube and condoms back to bed, but he also left his boxers in a pile on the floor and it made Arthur grin from anticipation, hands at his own hips until he was tisked and tutted not to do that.
"Oh? This isn't going to work if I'm still covered up."
"You won't stay that way for long, Tesoro." They shifted and changed position on the bed, Arthur piling the pillows against the headboard so he could lean back and relax, arms up waiting for Feliciano to climb back on top of him for more kisses and strokes and caresses, but he was foiled when his lover bent down between his legs instead, settling all the way back like- oh.
Feliciano was not subtle in bed, his hand didn't ghost over Arthur's crotch but came down in a full, warm sweep that settled over him and held on loosely. Being rubbed through cotton wasn't the nicest feeling, but his grip and the way Feliciano was humming to himself bid Arthur be patient. He didn't say anything as he rocked his hips gently under that hand, but then the grip fell away and those warm fingers returned at the waistband of his boxers instead. He was being so considerate and careful that it was almost Arthur's turn to ask if something was bothering him.
But just because Feliciano wasn't subtle didn't mean he couldn't tease. His fingertips were a warm delight that pried the cotton down off Arthur's backside first, but as soon as the head was uncovered Feliciano dipped his face down with a kiss, then a slow, wet lap of his tongue. It was coy, but oh the shiver Arthur felt down his hips…
He wasn't hard enough to stand erect, but Feliciano was wonderfully thorough about fixing that. His mouth followed the edge of Arthur's boxers until half of him was out, then his soft lips and ready tongue travelled back up to lick and suck at him until his toes curled. The boxers were pulled down the rest of the way and it was torture to lose that attention for one of his legs to be lifted and bent so Feliciano could get the cotton off of him, but he kept one hand stroking his base until with a soft chuckle he lowered himself back down and Arthur sighed so hard he missed the pop and snap of the bottle between Feliciano's hands.
"I love you…" A warm hand came back to palm down under Arthur's balls, fingertips softly stroking the sensitive skin behind them while lifting gently. He knew what Feliciano was doing, but he also felt the way his lover gave such a suck and pulled the head properly into his mouth so Arthur could unravel a little bit more and run his hands through Feliciano's hair. He bent his legs and spread his thighs to make the next part easier, not that he really needed to when a lube-slicked knuckle stroked down someplace unspeakable, fingers so clever and patient that Arthur found only pleasure at the slow, persistent rubbing outside that matched the beat of Feliciano licks and sucks.
"It's not my first time-mhm…" Arthur had never felt pain with Feliciano in control and this was turning out no different. The stimulation was making him tremble, thighs rigid and hips overwhelmed without a sense of which way to flex or push for more. One finger when he was already so willing and wanting meant he just had to wait for the lube to spread before he had to consciously relax around two knuckles instead. Arthur gasped and licked his own lips, eyes confused when he opened them and had to look down his own chest to find his lover's head.
Feliciano let him out of his mouth without going down properly, leaving kisses down the shaft and murmuring warm words Arthur couldn't hear as those fingers spread and moved in and out of him. It was slow and it was thorough, a dizzying thirst growing in his throat that demanded either water or kisses, but he wasn't about to get either one as the hand fondling him reached up and pumped him once from head to base and back again. He'd taken his hands off Feliciano's head already, fingers curling hard in the sheets when a third finger came a little sooner than expected, but Feliciano's kisses had him standing straight and shaking with weak thrusts out onto that hand.
"More?"
"Stupid question-" Arthur grunted, but then he closed his eyes and tipped his head back again when the warmth and wet of Feliciano's mouth fell over him again, and it went deep this time with the motion and rhythm of his throat. The fingers pleasing Arthur stalled as the focus shifted, and both of his hands came up to hold Arthur's thighs open, hips pushed down because choking on his lover by accident had only happened once, but Feliciano had a sharp memory for things like that.
Arthur didn't mind the precautions, if anything having so much weight forcing him down meant he could moan and struggle all he wanted to rut into the hypnotic up and down washing over him. His hands went clawing from the mattress to his own hips, grasping for Feliciano's hands and finding them, fingers weaving together tightly on the dry hand and struggling frantically where the lube on his other one did its job too well.
Arthur felt a hard puff of air hit his skin and Feliciano's head came up too high to keep him in, Arthur exposed to the bedroom air again and groaning softly at the loss. Ah, but there was also his boyfriend's laughter to tide him over, a frantic giggling that came complete with Feliciano resting his forehead on Arthur's stomach, nuzzling over his navel as the blond got fed up with the failed hand-hold and snaked his grip around to take Feliciano by the wrist instead. There, much better.
"You're so persistent." About holding hands? Oh shut up!
"Get up here already."
"I'm not finished yet-"
"You're finished if I say you're finished now Feliciano Vargas you get up here and you fuck me." And he gave a demanding tug on Feliciano's arms to punctuate the order!
Feliciano just burst out laughing properly this time, rolling there on his belly between Arthur's legs and leaving kisses on his stomach while Arthur refused to let go of his hand and wrist. He was smiling though, struggling not to mimic the laughter as Feliciano clumsily made his way to his knees, and Arthur let one of his hands go so he could use it to lever himself up properly and settle with one shoulder under Arthur's, hand holding his side and slipping under his back. He was still too far down for kissing, but he was grinning so purely that Arthur had to screw up all of his bitter, resentful feelings towards the pause not to fall into the same sense of bliss.
It was a hard battle and he was losing.
"Why would I want to fuck you, Arthur?"
"Please tell me you're being clever."
"Of course!" Arthur let Feliciano's other hand free too, and he was rewarded in two ways for it. The first was the condom packet that was pressed into Arthur's palm, and the second was Feliciano grabbing him by the back of the head and rising up at the same time for such a kiss. Strong and controlling, mouths open and a full, aggressive sound in his lover's throat as his tongue slipped back and forth over Arthur's. And the kiss didn't suddenly end either, not until Arthur was being forced down hard into the pillows behind him, both arms up and coiled around Feliciano's shoulders and head, hips grinding but not lined up properly for the penetration Arthur wanted.
He had to break the kiss himself because he could barely breathe, toes curled and body aching for that kind of passion all over instead of just on his lips.
"Why would I want to fuck someone I adore as much as you, when I could make love to him instead?"
"Cliché," Arthur accused, lips brushing Feliciano's as he spoke because they were holding each other just that close.
"You've got the condom, you make the rules, Tesoro." Arthur chose to kiss him for that remark instead of anything unsavoury. The condom wrapper came apart between his hands and then it was just the laughing, excited trouble of trying to worm his hands back down between their rocking bodies to get it on his lover. Arthur didn't appreciate the relative softness he felt down there however, and before Feliciano could try and lift his hips to get away Arthur had a good, firm grip on him that made the brunette tense up beautifully.
"Lube, darling?" Arthur asked with a long squeeze.
"I can't reach it." My, didn't someone sound breathless.
"Stretch." Arthur made the rules and ensured that there was enough slack and space for Feliciano to get one arm down and paw fretfully between Arthur's legs for the bottle. It meant they both had to sit up with Arthur contently stroking and squeezing the man in front of him, but finally the purple-capped bottle was found and Arthur was liberal with it, stealing kisses from his lover's flushed lips, touching his cheeks and nipping at his throat before the condom was in place and they could slowly twist and tangle with each other again.
Feliciano kissed him the same way, hard and heavy, one hand grasping Arthur's neck from behind and cradling his head to keep him busy. There was a soft murmur about what to do if it hurt, and Arthur gave a warning push with one hand on his shoulder to communicate the fact that he would flip them over if Feliciano didn't get on with it.
His eagerness was calmed when he finally felt Feliciano and the guiding hand there between his legs and pressing down on his hips. Their bodies were separate so they could have the easiest, kindest angle. Feliciano stopped holding him down as soon as they were ready, because the only thing that made this part harder than it had to be was not letting both of them move and adjust at the same time.
"Yes…" But it still felt good. The stretching, the tension, the nail-biting need to move constricted by the sensible, experienced fact that going slow was always better. Arthur was gasping and Feliciano was there leaning down with eyes closed to kiss his cheeks and murmur soft things in his ears, but it still felt good, it still felt so completely satisfying on top of physically filling. He could barely move his hips at all by the time Feliciano was completely settled, but his breaths calmed down quickly and he was thrilled to return those kisses, hands petting and stroking across his lover's skin telling him he was perfectly alright.
"I love you, Arthur." And he knew how to whisper over-done, cliché things in Arthur's ear and make them sound completely new and untouchable, his arms winding under Arthur's shoulders and holding him warm and tight, perfectly close and connected.
Arthur moved his hips first, to little effect, his lips on Feli's and holding them softly. It was better than speaking because it gave Feliciano the pause to take a breath and then the will to move.
"I love- oh…" his toes curled at the shallow thrust, thighs trembling despite how easy the motion was. It made the full feeling in his lower half retreat and then come back in full force, the unmistakeable sensation of being stretched and filled causing him to moan softly before it happened again. He had Feliciano's hot breaths fluttering down his shoulder the next time, a gasp when Arthur pushed his hips up into another thrust, and moaned again when it kept happening. "Faster…"
He said the wrong word: he meant deeper but Feliciano silently obliged him, taking himself almost all the way out so Arthur tensed to keep him in before being pushing back down and shuddering from the pleasure.
There was no rhythm yet, the tension over him wasn't settling down either. He felt Feliciano's legs stretching on the mattress trying to shift his weight to push down, his arms unlocking from behind Arthur's shoulders and bracing him on the mattress as another thrust was worth a soft gasp. Combining the staggered, deep hits with the kisses that came breathlessly down the side of his throat and Arthur knew what his lover was struggling for, and he groaned his name with one hand combing back through auburn hair.
"More…" Another push that made his toes curl in the bedding.
"Soon, Tesoro, soon…" And another that felt almost right and Arthur bit his lip gently. A little closer and- ahh..!
"Yes-" The next one missed but he corrected for it so fast Arthur gasped and felt himself shake, feet off the bed and spine doubled over. "Now more, now-!"
It was an electric sting, a burn more intense than an itch but impossible to equate with pain. It sat right in the seat of Arthur's hips and instead of relieving it when he thrust down, Feliciano's actions just made the burn flare up mercilessly. The air rushed out of his lungs and Feliciano suffocated him with a sudden kiss and gloating smile that started Arthur panting, completely missing the way he pulled out until he cried again because Feliciano's whole spine twisted into the thrust of his hips into Arthur's.
"Mine-" It was the only word of Italian he understood in the string of low, possessive words that came pouring into his ear like poison, hips rising and being pushed back down with every bite of pleasure gnawing on his bones. Taking too deep a breath made their stomachs push and trapped his cock between their bodies as Feliciano came down again, and Arthur's spine twisted from the overstimulation.
No counting- he didn't want to know how many times Feliciano pushed him down. He closed his eyes because he refused to catch sight of the clock on the wall, its endless ticking drowned out by his gasps and cries. They'd gone so much faster and harder than this before, but it wasn't the same.
Feliciano would kiss at any moment except the ones when they were trapped in each other and fighting to breathe between gouts of pleasure, but Arthur could barely move his head without feeling lips on his cheeks, his chin, his eyes, his temples- he was being showered with them. Kisses and whispers: broken endearments and possessive gasps that for once Arthur couldn't connect with just talking dirty for effect, because he believed it.
"More-" He believed it and he wanted more of it, more kisses and sweat, more locked knees and tangled fingers, more whispers and promises and vows. For the first time he could remember Arthur's mind fled the roar of pleasure burning him with every thrust because he wanted what would come after too: to talk and touch and sleep and laugh, to be here and stay here, always, like this: in love. "Yours- I'm yours, I love you: more…!"
"Roll over-"
"Kiss me-!"
Two different demands and Arthur's was fulfilled at once, unable keep his mouth closed or let his lips lock on the kiss he begged for as he dug his nails into Feliciano's shoulders and dragged down with a keen moan of pleasure. He was coming undone and not afraid of it at all, begging breathlessly for more when Feliciano gasped at the scratches and changed his angle so he made long and full connections. Arthur's voice was rubbing his own ears raw as he could barely breathe without more making noise, but with his whole body jolting and rocking hard on his back with every thrust, he just tangled a hand tight in his lover's hair and strained himself for another kiss. Feliciano took him again with mouth and hips, his eyes closed while Arthur couldn't bear to look away, and then he felt the burn turn into water and an electric chill broke across his scalp and surged down his spine, washing deep into his hips with the next blow to his insides and- "A-already-?!" –he came.
His whole body tensed up and that with his cry must have been all Feliciano needed, because with a full, heaving gasp Arthur felt the rush of orgasm and the stream of hot wet fluid that hit his chest and stomach, every muscle tightening and twisting around his lover before all too soon it was over and everything started to unravel and relax.
But the full, stretching sensation didn't instantly go away, and Arthur's feet and legs didn't fall to the bed either. Instead through the fading dazzle of pleasure he felt Feliciano moving in and out of him, his skin and heart relaxing as the motions over him lost their focus but kept on doggedly. With Arthur no longer so wrapped up in himself, he opened his eyes wide to drink in the delicious pleasure of his lover in action.
"Have me," he panted, gasping softly with his head back when Feliciano hit that inner place again, his shoulders spread and flexing with his hands planted on the mattress, caging Arthur down so he could watch every muscle ripple and pull. "Use me, darling, I want to watch you." And feel him, and smell him, and rock his hips up into Feliciano's again like before, maybe not as dramatic but so willing and happy to oblige him. Arthur squeezed when Feliciano pulled back and relaxed to let him in, watching the bliss pass over his lover's face and listening to his voice catch, throat swallowing every time he closed his mouth where his lips were left hanging and sucking in ragged breaths of air. Locks of red hair were sticking to his brow and cheeks as he snapped back and forth, sweat glazing his bronze skin as Arthur watched him like a dream, hands on his knees to keep his hips up just right, shoulders hitting the pillows behind him every time he was pushed into. "Didn't- I didn't mean to finish so soon." His voice hitched because his breath wasn't all the way back into his lungs, but he hummed loudly and closed his eyes for a moment when Feliciano's sloppy, persistent actions grazed him again perfectly.
But Feliciano wasn't supposed to be a sloppy lover, and that realization made Arthur grin along with the desperate, pleading whimper from the man using him so thoroughly.
"I'm gonna die-" He moaned, Arthur's eyes watching the shallow muscles of his gut flex with another synchronized plunge and grinning, smiling so hungrily because his lover was just barely holding on now.
"I love you," Arthur whispered, clenching hard enough to make Feliciano almost choke and throwing him off for a second or two with a shiver over his bare shoulders. "I adore you," so of course he did it again, "Come now, darling, don't make that face." And again, and again, as many times as it would take with Arthur's heavy body relaxing and sinking down, his knees staying up on their own accord now so he could stretch his arms up over his head and hold the wood paneling behind the pillows he was lounging on, tongue licking his thirsty lips before Feliciano finally lost it.
And oh he lost it beautifully, arms completely straight and holding him up, head down and neck rigid with his spine arcing perfectly and all his weight down on Arthur's hips instead of his own knees. He shuddered and twisted, gasping several times before settling into a series of deep pants like he'd just run five miles. He dropped to his elbows first, forehead touching Arthur's chest and eyes closed as Arthur ran a hand down through his lover's sweaty hair, coaxing him to find the strength to lift his hips up and withdraw, finally relieving him of the swollen, paralysing fullness.
"Oh my god…" Feliciano swore softly, and Arthur felt him shifting to-
"Don't-"
"I don't care." –to settle and lay down on him and in the mess Arthur'd made of his own torso. He gave a sharp tisk on his tongue when Feliciano made the mess worse and didn't seem to care at all with his heart hammering Arthur's ribs and breaths fluttering across his chest. "We'll shower. A long, hot shower. Use all the water. Make it a bath: no standing."
"You're delirious," Arthur warned, arms creeping down now to settle across his boyfriend's shoulders and slowly rub down between his shoulderblades. If not for the moist, sticky feeling between them Arthur would have been ready to give in and close his eyes the way he knew Feliciano already had.
"I'm in love." Feliciano corrected him, body going limp and heavy on top of Arthur and ignoring him when he tried shifting his legs or giving a soft push to make Feliciano roll onto his side and let Arthur clean them up. "In love with someone who loves me…"
Oh, now didn't Arthur just have to pause when he heard that? And not in a terrified, upset sort of way either, not at all. Feliciano's ability to speak was always impaired after sex, for Arthur there was always the challenge of keeping track of his hands, which right now were holding his lover so close that Feliciano had to brave the discomfort between them to inch up and tuck his forehead under Arthur's chin to ease the tension Arthur's fingers were putting on dark skin.
"I do adore you…" He whispered back softly, tilting his head and pressing a warm kiss of his own to Feliciano's forehead. The soft sound his lover made in thanks for the kiss fooled Arthur into thinking he was moments from sleep, but then Feliciano surprised him instead.
"Then I want to meet your family." Oh-
"Darling, I reserve them for people I hate."
"Will meeting them make me stop loving you?" Arthur doubted that, and he said as much as he brought one hand to rest on Feliciano's hair. "Then I want to meet them, Arthur, please?"
"Only if I get to meet your brothers in return." He didn't think that response through all the way because Feliciano plucked his head up off Arthur's chest with such a sunny, brilliant smile that he knew he'd lost valuable ground.
"Yay! When can you come down to Italy?"
"Now, Feliciano-" But before Arthur could backpedal his way out of things, he was given a startlingly sweet kiss, a brief smooch over his lips that shut him up very quickly and left him laying there pouting at the grinning face in front of him. "You win."
"I always do." And another kiss to soften the loss, and because it didn't seem like either of them were going to be getting out of bed any time soon…
"Move over." Arthur succeeded in getting Feliciano off of him and onto his own side of the bed, sitting up a little too fast and letting out a soft 'ohh' at the twinge that ran straight across his hip and nibbled uncomfortably at the small of his back where so much weight had been resting. It was nothing new and it would go away, but he made sure he was quick about getting the bottle of lube and extra condom off the bed, then grabbing his discarded boxers and using them to try and get rid of as much of the tacky mess on the both of them as possible. He was an expert shot and got the rumpled grey cotton in the clothes hamper from the bed, then dragged the sheets and comforter back up over both of them with Feliciano humming in appreciation and helping cuddle up close to him again. "Don't you dare leave this bed without me…"
"You promised me a day in bed, I'm not going anywhere." Feliciano's eyes were closed, giving Arthur the opening he needed to lean in for a kiss that left his lover smiling contently. Fingers locked and toes touching, knees hooked around legs and only one pillow for both of them because this bed was just senselessly large. When Feliciano took a quick breath, Arthur tilted his chin up eagerly for the next kiss his lover gave back to him. "I love you…"
"And I adore you…" And another kiss, softer this time because it was hard to imagine falling asleep but harder still not to give up and sink into bliss.
"Don't leave me…" Oh, they'd have to fire Arthur on the spot before he'd even consider doing that…
They slept close and tangled like that until they were lost in the afternoon, and Arthur made sure his lover lost himself again completely under steaming jets of hot water trapped between cool limestone tiles and Arthur's will to hear him beg and scream for more with his body writhing under beads of soap and water dripping off him like pearls. They ordered in because cooking was a needless chore that left time for Feliciano to nap while Arthur paid the delivery man, clad in a housecoat and a clever towel around his neck that hid the red marks which might have caused a stir if seen.
God only knew what time it was before, between several helpings of fresh-to-order pizza and several cups of tea and coffee from Arthur's kitchen, they were bickering over several sheets of music with Arthur's guitar in Feliciano's lap. The argument was solved with a different kind of fingering, but it was more important to just kiss and nuzzle and grin and laugh after that. Finally though, hours and hours into their perfect day, Arthur remembered to ask something:
"Did I make you promise the day off over the phone? Were we out someplace?" Feliciano mocked him again for having forgotten it, but answered just the same.
"You sent an e-mail." He said it so matter-of-factly that Arthur forgot he was supposed to be looking for his tennis racket in the closet for tomorrow. "Here, I'll even prove it to you!"
"Feli I believe you."
"No no! You're going to look and read it!" So Arthur sat down obediently on the bed where Feli pointed him, and he took the phone when it was handed over with the e-mail open for reading, and he even hooked an obliging arm around his lover when Feliciano straddled his lap and settled down quite comfortably to await validation.
It was an e-mail from Arthur's phone, dated Saturday of last week when Feliciano had been in Vienna and Arthur had been on a business venture with Francis from the office in Paris. He vaguely remembered the bar where he and Francis had spent most of the evening after their last meeting and hours before their flight back to London the next morning, but knew for a fact that nothing unsavoury had come out of it.
The e-mail simply read:
'You're in London next week, so take Saturday off. If you have plans: change them. I won't let you out of the house, you'll be lucky if I let you out of bed, my dear, because it's high time you knew the truth about something. Promise me, won't you? Good bye.'
And that was where the simple ended, because three things were very wrong. One: the icon on the e-mail said it had been answered, but that was a message Arthur knew for a fact had never arrived in his in-box. Two and three were exactly the same in nature. Instead of 'my dear', the actual text was 'mon cher', and instead of 'good-bye', it said 'adieu'.
Arthur had been in Paris.
Arthur had been drunk in Paris.
"Darling, how soon did you reply to this?"
But Arthur Kirkland,
"Oh, right away I think? I was awake waiting for a bank transfer to go through."
Arthur Kirkland never wrote in French.
'Francis meddling Bonnefoy-!'
"Arthur-?"
Monday at the office was going to be a riot, but right now Arthur had someone's legs wrapped around his waist and an arm draped over his shoulder, sheets of music and a guitar abandoned on the bed behind him.
So with a simple toss of the phone to the pile of blankets next to him, Arthur tightened his arm around Feliciano and looked up at him again to plainly answer the curiosity swimming in his eyes.
"You make life warm and beautiful." He said matter-of-factly. "Don't ever stop doing that, I doubt you could if you tried but I digress: you're worth everything to me, Feliciano, and I love you for it."
It was hard to make him blush. Feliciano was always the sort to take happiness and rebound it back double rather than get caught up in his own momentary glee and let it overwhelm him. But Arthur got him this time: he summoned that soft pink colour that stained his dark cheeks, made Feliciano's eyes flutter and widen before glancing away to let the smile pull unconsciously at his full lips. The kiss he got for the effort was sweet and soft, almost innocent, and Arthur sighed longingly into it as strong fingers worked down his neck and slipped under the collar of his house-coat to caress his back.
The love and affection he got back in return for his honesty made Arthur reconsider the urge to commit murder on Monday. If Arthur was being handed the luxury of the stable marriage in exchange for the fleeting honeymoon, then he could abide by letting one Francis Bonnefoy live another day.
But only if Feliciano could convince him of it first.
"Day's not over yet, love."
"It will be by the time I'm done with you, Tesoro…"
OTP! Comment below?
