for Waiting in The Summer: After Story11/20/2018 c3 danioo77
You did a pretty good job in continueing the series.
i love how you picked up the part with her space ship at the ending of the series and also the "new" facts about her return.
you may shouldt go into further detail about the sex scenes, cause you had this platon like love in the series so these ecenes dontt fit the characters (in my opinion)
you should mention them but dont go into further detail.
But overall, loving the series and loving your fanfic.
hope you continue
You did a pretty good job in continueing the series.
i love how you picked up the part with her space ship at the ending of the series and also the "new" facts about her return.
you may shouldt go into further detail about the sex scenes, cause you had this platon like love in the series so these ecenes dontt fit the characters (in my opinion)
you should mention them but dont go into further detail.
But overall, loving the series and loving your fanfic.
hope you continue
11/15/2015 c3 EvanDoesStuffs
This is an amazing story.
Please continue 't mind what others say to you.
Because this is amazing.
Don't let the others say were awessome.
This is an amazing story.
Please continue 't mind what others say to you.
Because this is amazing.
Don't let the others say were awessome.
9/8/2015 c1 Wolfmanwolf
I just thought I might point out something about this story that's been bugging me a bit. I've noticed how certain sentences just get randomly cut and I was wondering if that's the website screwing up or if you are using the elementary method of dealing with run-on sentences.
If you are using the latter, at least try to wrap up the sentence correctly if your trying to shorten it. If there is valuable information at the end of the sentence that you don't want to cut, just split the sentence in half.
Besides the problem I had with the sentences being incomplete, it was overall not too bad of a story. The sex scene was a bit much considering the theme of the show, and you are writing a story featuring minors having sex. Just want to point out that does sort of make you seem like a pervert. Sure you say they are 18, but in the beginning you say it is 12 months after the end of the episode episode. Kai was 15 at the end of the last episode. That means he is 16 during this story and Ichika is 18 (assuming she, during the series, was in-fact 17 years old which would make sense since they said she is a Junior AKA 3rd year high school student).
I just thought I might point out something about this story that's been bugging me a bit. I've noticed how certain sentences just get randomly cut and I was wondering if that's the website screwing up or if you are using the elementary method of dealing with run-on sentences.
If you are using the latter, at least try to wrap up the sentence correctly if your trying to shorten it. If there is valuable information at the end of the sentence that you don't want to cut, just split the sentence in half.
Besides the problem I had with the sentences being incomplete, it was overall not too bad of a story. The sex scene was a bit much considering the theme of the show, and you are writing a story featuring minors having sex. Just want to point out that does sort of make you seem like a pervert. Sure you say they are 18, but in the beginning you say it is 12 months after the end of the episode episode. Kai was 15 at the end of the last episode. That means he is 16 during this story and Ichika is 18 (assuming she, during the series, was in-fact 17 years old which would make sense since they said she is a Junior AKA 3rd year high school student).
2/15/2015 c3 Acarid
This was great and I loved it just should touch up some of the errors throughout the chapters but besides that I need my chapter 4
This was great and I loved it just should touch up some of the errors throughout the chapters but besides that I need my chapter 4
12/24/2014 c3 Guest
you should make more .
you should make more .
8/2/2013 c3 Daniel Robertson
this is a great story i think u should conyinue as i would enjoy reading more and probably more LEMONS!
this is a great story i think u should conyinue as i would enjoy reading more and probably more LEMONS!
